January 14, 2003
Suicide chat rooms? Huh?
Internet suicide
chat room killer held
The Register had a morbidly interesting news story about a woman who
arranged her own murder via a "suicide chat room."
While not nearly as sensational as
the poor
schmuck who arranged his own murder AND cannibalising, it's still
pretty disturbing.
Get on antidepressants, people. Or take up chess or something. This
stuff is not healthy.
Posted by Christopher at January 14, 2003 01:05 PM
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Christopher, that is the stupidest comment I have ever heard, "Get on
antidepressants, people. Or take up chess or something." Of course, it's
not healthy, and ignorant people like you are making it worse giving out
unhealthy comments like that. If it were as easy as taking antidepressants
or taking up a hobby, do you think the sucide rate would be so high?
Of course, we should not take pills to alleviate the pain, nor should we
submit to stupidity when we lack the emotional maturity to cope with
complex issues. The suicide rate is high, but there is still a massive
gulf between the amount of people who have thought about it and the amount
of people who have actually done it. Why? Why don't the people who think
about it put a gun to their temples and blow themselves to the moon? There
must be something worth living for: not chess, and not prozac, but
something that is never explained and leaves us groping for oxygen... as
though it were sweeter than golden honey. To hell with all of you
gentlemen, love life to the best of your capacities, and if love runs dry,
then...
if u dont know what its like 2 want 2 die or 2 have tried 2 kill urself
dont think u have a right 2 say anything about us. itz not as easy as
taking ur antidepressants. 4 1 anti depressants take weeks 2 actually kick
in and when they do they screw up ur mood so ur not who u usually r and
friends think ur acting strange. u cant just start doing something new and
b happy it takes time. hell ive been like this 4 years and i still am not
even close 2 being better. understand the problem b4 u make comments ppl.
i believe that when we are faced with a issue which concerns more tha one
person, their families and friends the situation is even more intense and
with alot more consequences. It easy to say take up a hobby, to take anti
depressant, and any other recommended methods but live you life hoew you
want to. And don't anwer that question with i don't have a life to life
for because why are you here? there is a time and a place for everything
and enjoying your self is 24/7!! So i strongly suggest you take up that
method. don't assume anything all assuming does is make a Ass out of you
and me!! look at the word assume and you will see ASS-U-ME
I thought this was going to be a live chat room, but I see that it isn't.
I am having a very difficult time dealing with my husbands suicide. Can
someone steer me to the proper chat room? Thanks
hello! I thought that this was a real chatroom but it isnt. so i will go
and find on one that is...
If you know of any proper chatrooms then let me know.
Thanx.
like many others i thought this was a proper chat room does anybody know
of a real one or is this all a a joke? let me know if there is a proper
one bye and thank you
how the fk would takin anti-depressents make it all beta they don;t evan
wrk most of the time and u ppl sound pretty happy for ppl who r and hav
bin suicidal.
i made a comment recently on this "live chat" room and i didn't and i say
again didn't get any response from chris or any one else on this issue.
can someone please tell us all where a chat room is. As there are some
really big issue that people wish to sort out! over'n'out Angel96
hi everyone. Look i'm just saying that if any one here needs someone to
talk 2 or just needs a friend, i'm here 2 help. I had a friend who tried 2
kill himself recently but with plenty of help and support he began to
recover from his depression. I like helping people and i think it is
rewarding just to see that i've made somebody smile. It is not only hard
for the person who wants or is considering suicide but it's hard for the
person who is trying to help knowone knows what it is like to almost loose
one of your closest friends unless you have experienced it. You can come
to me with anything and i will happily listen and if you want my advice i
will do my best to give it to u. luv "n" hugs angel03xx
I had no idea this topic would generate as much interest and controvery as
it has. Lurid.org is now the #1 hit when someone googles for "suicide chat
rooms."
I've posted a list of resources on the main page. Please check
out http://www.lurid.org for some suicide related resources.
Well Christopher, I am glad you are so lucky/ healthy/smug/young/ignorant
or any combination thereof. I am a 57 year old health care professional
and almost took my life last night. No particular reason. In my case it
was the low pressure system from the storms that messed me up. Clinical
depression is a biological disorder just like diabetes or hypertension.
Not everyone is lucky enough to find a cure. It's hard and until it's
happened to someone you love, have some compassion. A doctor I work with
just had his 18 year old son hang himself for failing pre-med. You just do
not know until you have walked in another person's shoes. I am older,
alone, have no family. Last night I really needed someone to talk to.
Young man, life is not all what you think it "should" be. Lighten up on
the rest of us and thank what ever God you believe in that it is not YOU
who suffers from this disorder.
death....shoudnt be of pitty they just got smart
i thought this was a sucide chatroom obviously not. could u tell me the
addy to one pls!
thats it give them anti depressants and guess what??? they overdose.
shudnt we be tackling the issue instead of avoiding it? and the chess
comment just shows how ignorant u r!
Being lonely in the world in the worst thing. I wouldn't wish apon it to
anyone. Trying to find meaning for living is the saddest thing next to
being lonely to me. It sucks when all you think about when you wake up is
why you are still not dead. You think about if people would even notice
the space you gave up when you died. The reason that I am not dead right
now is that I way trying to find the best way for me to dye. I think I
should just be burned and barried and ever be talked about ever again, but
who would take the time to barry me? If you can help me find a reason to
live please help me now. Thank you
Beth,
Please contact someone with whom you can discuss your feelings.
Here is a link to another story on this site with some information
about suicide prevention.
Good luck and keep me posted.
http://www.lurid.org/archives/000199.html
hey if u want to talk chris i am here for u okay just wanted u to know
that well i got to split for now but not forever bye sweetie i am 14/f/tx
im gonna go kill my self right now
i had hoped this was a suicide chat room. I reeally want to hurt myself
right now, but no one seems to care. I'm all alone right now and i have a
bottle of extra strength tylenol and some strong wine. I hope it will do
the trick.
youre a fucking moron whoever owns this website
One of the most sacred of my rights as a rational person is my right to
self determination ... and when the time comes ... when the music stops
and it is no longer fun I curse anyone who so much as attempts to
interfere or hinder in any way how I exercise this right ....
And a pox on those who interfere with right to die laws.
DEB from Oz
I'm working on implementing a real-time chat room. Until then, please
refer to the list of suicide prevention resources I listed here:
http://www.lurid.org/archives/000199.html
i hate life coz all i have had in it is shit
To Beth and Diane and anyone else reading this with that incomprehensibly
heavy ache in your ribcage -
It can get better. It can. I went through
two years of trying to figure out the best way to end it. I woke up in the
morning and saw my life yawn in front of me as endless grayness, endless
pain. To shower in the morning was a tremendous accomplishment. My grades
plummeted (I was in fourth year university by the time I hit bottom), my
friends stopped calling because I could never give anything back, my life
collapsed.
After a failed attempt, in which a roommate came home earlier than
expected, I made the decision to leave everything behind and go live
overseas for awhile. For me, what I needed more than anything was to shake
up my little snowglobe, to try and find me amidst all the pain and sense
of failure.
It was so hard, but I returned to North America two years later with a
strong sense of who I am, what I want from the world, and how to get it.
This may not be the answer to your suffering, I realize, but I guess I
cannot go to bed tonight without at least trying to tell one of you, any
of you, that no matter how gray it may seem, no matter how hopeless it
feels, THIS CAN END. Life can be worth living. You can believe you're
worth living again.
Please do not give up. Suicidal people are often those who feel the
suffering of the world the most acutely - we need you on this planet to
counter all those other people who become so overconfident that they
abandon their humanity. We NEED you.
May you find the strength for one more day's fight.
E.
I too am disappointed not to have found an actual chat room. Thank you for
that last comment, "Ka". It made the most sense of many other opinions
that seem to TOTALLY miss the point. Having said that, i have one
question......... I have long had the belief-feeling-view point-whatever
that ANY of the many things ppl do to try to get my interest Back into
Living Life, are nothing more than distractions to occupy my time untill
such time as i die of natural causes at an age when Others will feel more
comfortable. This is something that I KNOW even when I don't feel quite
brave enough to take my life, or gloomy enough to ignore the fear or pain
of death. That fact never changes for me. And I have never been able to
have any one propperly address it. Anybody feel like giving it a go??
Hey Bono,
Others are always going to grieve for you, whether you die at
your own hand at 15 or by cancer at 95. Any, or at least most, attempts to
help are not to distract you from taking your own life for the short term
but are trying to help you see the reasons you shouldn't. Yes, it's
probably a little selfish - so's not sharing your ice cream with a friend
because you really want that extra six mouthfuls.
The problem is, no one can understand how much it hurts unless they are
or have been in it: people who tell you "life is wonderful, buck up!" (my
parents used to say "I can't understand why someone of your talents is so
unhappy!") usually only serve to push you deeper when you realize that
life isn't always so wonderful.
Your life is yours alone and no one can or should tell you what to do
with it. And, therefore, you and you alone can find the reasons for making
the decision to live.
In the meantime, recognize that the people trying to "distract" you are
doing the only thing they can think of in the face of losing someone they
care deeply about. And no, this doesn't just mean family or friends, who
can often be less than supportive when you're this low; I have never met
any of you but, since happening upon this site, you have never once left
my mind or my heart.
So try to forgive us for being selfish and trying to keep you on this
plane with us for a bit longer. Life's too short at the best of times and,
when you care about someone, you'd give anything for an extra day, month
or year with them.
E.
Only thing I can think of is take a walk and get your mind off this
subject and into something else.
And don't listen to the negatives obviously inhabiting this thread just
to do harm. Don't even need to know they've harned anyone as long as their
sick perverted message is seen they've done their work.
Get a pet or something that would depend on you being there tomorrow.
Even a plant or garden.
does anyone know how to purchase cyanide???
i found a live suicide support chatroom. www.4-lane.com
here are some more
www.eyecatchers.com
www.depressiontalk.net
lightinthedark.net
walkers.org
im on my 16th tylenol as i type this, and with any luck ill be done for
soon. if i dont make another post in 2 days, count tylenol as my two
thumbs up method!
I agree with these people ! this is no chat room this is a tease to people
that need help want help and you say this is a chat room Duh! it not it's
a tease!
I hope those that need a friend or someone to talk to find that . I know I
do! I guess I won't get it here.
Val.
I know this is a joke of a chatroom, it's just a message board---i have
found a suicide support chatroom at www.4-lane.com. check it out, there
are some others i have posted earlier as well. Hope to see you there.
Faerie (((hugs))) and kisses ... and she flutters off...
This site is a weblog, not a chat room. It was never intended to be a chat
room. Take a look at the main page http://www.lurid.org and you'll see it
is a personal web site and not a site dedicated to suicide prevention.
If the need/interest exists, I may implement a real-time chat room. I'm
looking at php-based chat solutions now.
If you would use a real-time chat room, please respond here so I can
guage the interest level.
Thanks.
--Christopher
i ve tried
ive never succeeded
tonight i want to succeed
but i want it to be easier and smoother that before
will it
Suicide is not the answer for anything. You can get on pills or talk to
someone or just have the balls to hang on. And for those of You who say
well, have You tried it? Yes, I have. I had a razor blade and was starting
to slit myself. You know what held me back, the fact that killing myself
was going to hurt the few people that did care about me. So, instead I put
the razor blade down and went out to the movies. And if anyone reads this
and needs to talk, e-mail me at aphroditehecate@yahoo.com. See, now You
know someone cares so until You talk to me You can't kill Yourself.
~Britt~
Can anbody describe the pain that you go through? I know that emotional
pain is so bad sometimes that people find it unbearable and use suicide to
escape from the pain. i feel this pain as well - some have described it as
being like a stabbing pain inside. I can't decribe it. Can any of you?
Lodso
you know what the cool thing about deciding to kill myself is. it is
figuring how to come up with a way to make all of the people who have
caused me the pain that drives me to suicide feel it back ten fold.
suicide is only an end if you die like a baby curled up in a corner with
your pill bottle lying at your feet. instead is it not better to cause an
event so horrific that not only the people who have caused you pain,or the
people who have ignored your pain so they can feel better, or the people
in power who feel that they can flaunt their power while you are crushed
by the weight of their tyranny.ahh im getting off track. anyways wouldnt
it be better to make a name for your self like dahmer, gacy,
kazinski,rudolph,bin laden, and on and on you get the picture. anyways if
you think im giving away the game by saying who i am than you are crazier
than i am. of course it could just be like the saying goes i am normal it
is everyone else who is crazy.
oh well tata for now ill be back maybe
this will sound totally retarded but whats it like wanting to kill ur
self? coz my friend tried once but i got to her in time (before she could
do any serious damage to her self). she used to talk 2 me about it but she
could never put all of it to words so she didn't say much. i want to try
and understand part of what she went through.
i want to be in heaven with god, there is one person in this fucking world
who cares bout me and her name is becca. she is suiccidle too, someone
kill me.
i want to be in heaven with god, there is one person in this fucking world
who cares bout me and her name is Ashley. she is suicidal too, someone
kill me PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!
I have had alot of suicide thoughts lately because I am short fat and
going through a seruious depression.
Christopher you are a pain in my ass because i thought this was a chat
room. Hope you are happy in misdirecting people with your useless
comments.
christopher should help me out, bring me a gun a pull the trigger, im on a
high dose of anti-deprssants and i play chess, you think thats gonna
freaking help???? i wish you killed yourself your the reason we feel this
way sicko's like you..............y should we want to kill ourselves when
its people like you we should kill!!!!!!!!!!!
For those who posted alot of these comments doesn't know what it is like
to think about suicide. I think about it alot, there are things in my life
that encourages me to not live anymore, I have a boyfriend that makes me
very happy, and he is the reason I still breath, but there are other
things going on in my life that makes it hard to even get out of bed,
things I have no control over right now. Everyone tells me to be patient
and wait, that God will work things out. God, he is the other reason I
still live, I'm not a christian, but I do believe in God. And I believe in
hell, that is not a place I want to go. I do think about it, alot, but for
the small or big reasons I haven't done it, I'm glad I have. But here
lately, I scare myself, because I find myself thinking about it alot more,
and I find myself in a state of mind that I can't control. And this
feeling is not a good one, I used to be so happy and full of life, I'm not
sure what happened, I used to think I could control how I feel, but trust
me, I was wrong, no one can control how their going to feel, you wake up
in the morning and think hey I'm going to be happy today, because
something might happen to trigger your emotions, and make you feel like
life isn't worth living.
hey raylenne or what ever the hell your name is dont fucken say that to
chris is you are in depression you should damn well know not to tare him
down cus would you like to find out you were the cus of someone dieing
that is bull shit i have tryed to kill my self more then ne one i know of
it been 14 years of suicide in my life and its becus ppl have been so rude
and mean and no human like say "bring me a gun a pull the trigger, im on a
high dose of anti-deprssants and i play chess, you think thats gonna
freaking help???? i wish you killed yourself your the reason we feel this
way sicko's like you..............y should we want to kill ourselves when
its people like you we should kill!!!!!!!!!!!" that is so not call for kay
you know damn well how it feels to be so sad into the pool you would do ne
thing to die okay chris was giving ideas and chess isnt gonna kill you!
your attitude is! grow up!!!!!!!!!!! chris if you are still here i dont
know you or your story but i will help you and every one in here i am a
surviver of suicide and i can help i want you guys to know when the world
seems so big and no one there loves you, i do and so does heavenly father
!!!!!
~*~ JasiLynn price~*~
heh. i would like to be the cause of someone dying. i would like to start
a group suicide in my town but i'm just not sociable enough to find
people.----------i'm on antidepressents and stuff but the only thing that
does is screw with my sex drive. i'm also on an antipsychotic but all that
does is make me to drugged up to think about the things that bother
me.---------october 10th is my death date. the way i'm gonna go is take a
dissociative (dextromethorphan-ingredient in cough syrup) and then slash
my wrists. it'll be a .slow.painless.death.
by the way, when you slash your wrists make sure you do it the correct
way. don't go across your veins. go *with* your veins. that way it won't
clot. or something.
maybe none of us really have problems. that doesn't mean we can't commit
suicide for the experience of committing suicide. we can still be tired of
our lives et cetera. i'm sure you understand. it seems like suicidal
people think they know more than everyone else. i do it.
My life sucks, I'm tired of living it, I don't feel like going on anymore,
I know now no one can help me get better, especially the people on the
internet, because no one knows if my life is worth living, no one knows
me.
hey debbie thanks i know what you are talking about! i have lived with
depression all my life andi know how it feels to wanna kill myself! and i
know who it feels to lose someone who killed them self and it hurts i
loved them that is whats changed my life all the way and who ever said
they are gonna kill them selfs on oct 10 dont please you are ending you
hurt but you are hurting a lot more then ending hurt! trust me well g2g
love y'all
~* Jasilynn~*~
*sighs*
It's not easy to be happy when you're feelin so alone.
I understand, i've been to the darkest places and
Continue to return there; my dark and lonely places!
Who's gonna stand by my side, comfort me and help
me through this hell, i'm alone in the valley
of darkness.. And i keep commin back for more!
People shouldn't suffer in silence.
"When you laugh, The whole world laughs with you.
But when you cry, You cry alone?"
Lonely crys with tears in eyes, there's millions like
You, that's no surprise ;-)
This place dont to have a live chatroom?
It's nice to have a place to meet decent friends...
Might not be the cure, but it might also help you...
Talk to friends sharing simular intrests/problems.
If enough people email me, i can set a live session up.
There's alot of people out there that couldn't care
Less about your situation, BUT! there's millions! of
People out there who would love to help you back on your feet.
Huh am i makin this up as i go along? probably,
At the least someone will see it :-l
ep_freeland@hotmail.com
Becca, you n your friend could have alot of fun together during you years,
go on vacations, dancing, shopping! whatever you like doin together!
Don't you know, we only get one life, it might be hell at times, but when
it's gone, it's gone.
And then you cant miss eachother.
Debbi you'r not alone, and i agree the
net isint the the best of places at times, but there's alot of good peeps
out there, hard to trust though, i know
now i gotta go be alone cya
it seems like all the suicidal people think that they know something that
everyone else doesn't. i mean, they'll always say that no one can help
because no one knows me. or knows what i understand. bah nevermind. i'm
guessing cuz it's something i do.
Does tylenol OD actually work?
I don't know if tylonal od works, but I do know it can make you severely
ill, and mess with your kidneys, trust me, I tried it. The doctor said I
was lucky that it didn't kill me, I didn't think I was lucky, because
thats what I was trying to do. I have also tried Lortabs with ibuprofin.
These also make you severely ill, I've tried to od, Then for a while
people convince me that life is worth living, I'm happy only for a short
time, then I fall back into the pit I was pulled out of. I have beautiful
children and a loving boyfriend that need me, I really do want to live,
but my illness or whatever yo call it takes over, and my life don't seem
as important.
To all those that read this, I'm sorry for the same post over and over,
but for some reason , my post it botton froze up on me, and I didn't want
to aggravate anyone, really sorry.
TO ANYONE AND EVERYONE!
here to announce>
IF ANYONE EVER NEEDS SUMONE TO TALK TO OR JUST TELL UR PROBS TO OR HAVE
SOMEONE TO ASK ADVICE I AM HERE I AM HERE TO HELP CUS I TOO HAVE FALLEN
INTO DEPRESSION,...HAD THOUGHTS BOUT THE DARKER SIDES OF LIFE...BATTLED
PPL IN PURSUIT OF MAKING ME BURN INTO A PILE OF SHIT...IVE BEEN THROUGH
THE SAME SITUATIONS AS MANY PPL IN THE WORLD... TALK TO ME CUS I TOO NEED
SOMEONE TO TALK TO!
"To die would be an awful big adventure"...........
Peter Pan
^^^lets find out. Heghlu'meH QaQ jajvam.
Debbie you're right, you have beautiful kids and a boyfriend, they love
you more than anyone, imagin what they'd be like without you.
I'm nt so lucky to have a beautiful wife and kids, and the rest nobody
wants to hear about.
Try your best, everybody has bad days, some worse than others.
People, think of the damage you'll cause to the minds of
Your young ones, friend/s, family, aquantances...
I've seen so many people go through un nessacery pain as a result of
someone giving up their lives.
I'm struggeling, but i'm still here and i know that you cant tell what's
around the next corner.
But this is the only adventure we have, the next life is just a dream,
live the reality first.
Do you love me, or do you not?
You told me once, but I forgot.
I had a heart so tender and true,
but now it's gone from me to you.
I do the believe the lord above,
sent you here for me to love.
he picked you out of all the rest,
because he knew I'd love you best.
If I shall die and go up there,
I'll write your name on the golden stair.
If your not there by judgement day,
I'll know you went the other way.
I'll give the angels back their wings,
golden harps and other things.
Just to prove my love is true,
I'll go to hell to be with you.
I'm sure that all people have someone
that love them this much, and feel as they're their world, please try to
hold on, and let the people in their lifes enjoy them as long as God will
allow. There are sorrow and pain all around, you can't hide from that, but
we can hold are heads high, and live the life God has granted us, to the
fullest.
By the way, Debbie is one of my friends, I stumled on this using her
computer, she has it saved, I try to talk to her about her problems all
the time, and I hope that each and everyone of you have someone that tries
to help you and talk to you about how important you are to them and the
other people you have in your lifes.
I use to have someone special, but now we dont talk.
i'm glad debbie has friends, look after her, it's a terrable feeling to
have people around you and still feel alone. and worse if she had noone to
turn to.
peace!
Ep, I understand you, I know exactly what your talking about, everyone I
talk to close to me, they don't understand. They talk to me, but they tell
me how I should be feeling, instead of listening to my problems, they
can't understand how I feel, and the most usually ask me why I'm not
happy, because they believe just having them should make me happy. They
don't see the stress and how my heart is breaking all of the time. Some
actually yell at me when I say I don't feel like living anymore, so I
continue to hide the way I feel. the way I did at the beginning, and I go
through this alone.
Hey Debbie, at least this board gave you & me &
anyone else, a chance to clear the head and get
some troubled thoughts out in the open B-l
That normaly noone else would want to hear *laughs*
They should delete all those stupid suicide stories
too and focus on the living and recovery!!..
instead of something we know nothing about.
I feel i have a reason to be here, but i'm not sure what that is at
present. i'm happy today, i could be
mentaly depressed tomorrow, but i'll deal with it. you do the same! think
of the happy times ahead, watching you kids grow. Would you let anybody
harm one of your kids? i doubt it, they'd be alot worse without you truse
me, scared for life.
Now i haven't got anything off my cheast but hope you feel good today :-l
Peace!
Ep, I feel the same, I come in here and type my problems, it relieves some
of my stress, not all, but at least I'm able to tell how I feel among
people that feel the same way, or are at least interested in hearing. I'm
not like alot of people, that is constantly depressed, I do have my happy
times. But they don't last, and when this horrible feeling comes over, I
can't control my thoughts, so I usually curl up in a corner on my bed, or
in a chair, in the dark, and cry until I fall asleep, or at least
something happens to make me feel better.
I hate this feeling that I have all the time, it scares , me. I wish it
would all go away.
well, when i told one of my friends i'll be slashing my wrists come
whenever, he told me to make sure and do it right. cutting across the
veins is wrong. cutting with the veins is good. less clogging clotting
whatever. he's a good friend.
it's a feeling i like. it's a feeling i
had last year. it was amazing. maybe i felt like shit but the feeling was
awesome. but i was depressed. maybe that's the feeling i like. but now,
killing myself has become...how much do i hate myself?
Skimmer, I don't know you, but I would like to be your friend. A friend
who tells you how to cutt your risk, can't be that good of a friend. A
friend wouldn't want to lose you. I can say this and honestly mean it, you
are the first person I ever heard of, that likes the way depression feels.
I don't, and I wish I never felt it, I try to avoid this room now, because
I don't seem to find much help, I think the room was actually created to
make fun of suicide, not to try to help.
I don't know much about life, but I do know the one I have is the only one
I'll live. Then after that is eternity, and I don't want to live eternity
in hell, because I couldn't handle the life God gave me.
thought i oughta bare my naked feelings/thought i oughta tear the curtain
down/i held the blade in trembling hands prepared to make it but/just then
the phone rang/i never had the nerve to make the final cut
Skimmer don't be stupid, noone wants to be depressed lol
Maybe next time you'll get a little closer and you'll scare the life out
of some friends when they find you have alive. I hope there's not a next
time man!. noone wants that!
Hey now we have Debbie giving good advice yay!
They probably did create this board to make fun of suicide, but i don't
see noone laughing !
Keep up the good work lurid! looks like it's turning round :-i
Jesus i'm depressed.
i read all the comments and i am still depressed.
i dont know why i want to die, my family r rich im 16 and i have a nice
car and a beautiful girlfriend.
why do i hate life and why do i feel so empty like i have this hole that
sucks all my fealings away. and finaly why doesnt any one care
Brad, have you talked to your family or your girlfriend about how you
feel? Maybe you'll realize that people really do care, you are 16 years
old, you're to young to end your life, everyone no matter what the age is
to young to end their own life. Death will come on it's own, we don't need
to make it happen.
EP, I wish I could take my own advice, I'm not stupid, I know what my life
is worth, I just forget myself. I don't want to see anyone kill theirself,
or hear about it, but I'm human. I too am depressed, and I come to this
room to relief some stress, the other night I really needed to come in
here, but I couldn't get connected to my internet server, I sit and cried
all night, and I felt worst than I ever did.
I'm in that deep dark cold hole tonight, is there anyone out there?
Jees that was yesterday Debbie, hope you're well today
I wake up lately and its as if i've been thinking all through my sleep!!
Brad, you should tell your g/f if you can't talk to your family.
Maybe she can help you figure it out or get you some help?
Don't let it get to you, everybody has depression or stress, but we all
handle it differently
Some better than others, the strong survive!
I feel weak but i'm surviving :P
Least yall got someone to turn to if youd just relized you can.
I remember when i though i could talk to someone, then they left me alone
:-l
So forgive me for not being close with any of you, but i feel you too!
Peace
i like this girl. i've been having an awesome fantasy. no sex for me. i
want to taste a depressed girl's tears and blood. i mean, how hot is
that!!? no seriously, has anyone else had something like that?
Well, the mood I'm in tonight is much different, I'm very pissed off. Life
is a funny story, huh?
Skimmer, don't worry, everyone has fantasies, I have some weird ones all
the time.
For those who really want to know how suicidal depression feels, I'll
share about what mine feels like. YMMV.
I'm down, sad, and lonely,
perhaps angry or mad but unwilling or unable to express it. I hate myself
for not only something I did (or didn't do), but also for all the other
mistakes I've made in my life, especially those few thousand mistakes that
emotionally hurt other people. I wonder what's wrong with me. I believe
I'm hopeless and that I can never get better. I believe I'm broken.
I look back and see that the years of therapy and self-help groups have
NOT helped. I've been on meds for about a year and still I cycle into deep
depression. I see myself as an utter failure with no solution in sight.
Nothing seems to help.
I feel despair, darkness, a desire to be far away from everything. I
literally want to crawl off somewhere and die. I don't want to be seen, or
touched, or "helped", because I don't deserve it. And since I'm so fucked
up it won't matter anyway.
I believe that people would be better off without me. Sure my loving
wife will miss me and it will hurt her for a while if I die. But when I
compare that to hurting her for decades to come, the choice seems clear. I
never want to hurt her or anyone else, but despite that I still make
mistakes. I feel utterly hopeless.
When I cry it seems to come from my soul which is filled with pain,
loneliness and despair. Maybe if I cry long enough it will end... but it
doesn't. No one really understands, even though I can explain all this
quite clearly. It's so tempting to give up and just close in on myself for
good.
Why am I still alive? I don't know. Maybe I'm too weak to actually do
it, but I doubt it, because over time the hopelessness and despair deepen
even more, and fewer and fewer options are left. I've visualized dozens of
ways to perform it. I've thought alot about what I would write in letters
that I leave to others, mostly apologizing for having been in their lives
at all.
The only "out" I have for myself is a decision to call 1-800-SUICIDE
before I actually kill myself. Not that it will necessarily help, but what
the hell -- one last shot. Often I re-read this:
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
Eventually I go do something and go from "suicidal" to "severely
depressed" -- an improvement. Or I fall asleep and wake up moderately
depressed. Some days I feel ok, others are killers (sorry 'bout the pun).
For anyone who CANNOT sympathize with these feelings: please do not
post here. If you can't be helpful, please find something more
constructive to do than kicking people when they are already way down. Go
find some conceited bastard or bitch to slam instead. Thanks.
No one should be forced to live a life they do not wish to. I know what
the doctor would say that my depression was due to an unbalance of
chemicals in my brain. But no antidepressants could change the enviroment
I am in nor the people who affect me.
Oh yea, for all you who have thought of slitting your wrists, make sure
you cut along the veins in your arm not across, keep your arms away from
you body, also hot water helps keep the blood from clotting. No one is
fully responsible for murdering themselves.
You all have your own problems, i don't think any of them relate to mine,
i'm in hell, or something close to it.
I'm working on an animation, i'll be in it and a few other persons. Don't
know if i'l be here to see the responce it gets but it'll be posed so the
right people get to see it, maybe they will see my situation.
Great site maybe ill be the top story soon
peace
I was hopeing to chat with a live person,guess not! Time is running out,I
don't know what to do,well I do. Sorry to have bothered you,if any one's
there.
I was hopeing to chat with a live person,guess not! Time is running out,I
don't know what to do,well I do. Sorry to have bothered you,if any one's
there.
Wow it's people like you that make depressed people just want out of this
world even more..how can people preach life will be happy when they
haven't even experienced the pain people thinking of suicide have dealt
with..it's like going to an alchol annoymus class and having the fucking
counselor never had a drink before..it doesn't work..thanks for making me
consider this more..shit you really shouldn't be so insentive :/
Dear No
Thats not fare! I came here looking for help,not to be shit on. There must
be somebody out there who cares if i live or die?
I was'nt trying to hurt anyone,just myself. Please do'nt act on my pain.
Icould'nt forgive myself.
Although,your words speak to me with abundent clarity!!!!!!!!!!
Mike, I can relate to how you feel, I didn't need you to describe those
feelings, but I'm glad you did, because you also described how I feel.
I find the events that happen in my life make me even more depressed, I am
told by everyone that it'll get better. But everything just gets worse,
when is it suppose to get better? How am I suppose to believe things are
going to get better?
Everyday as time passes, I just see myself getting old and feeling this
way forever, I don't want to live this pain any longer, I've realized, I'm
just in the way, I'm not good for anything, my life is worthless.
Why do some people just have nothing but good luck following them, and the
rest of us jsut have black clouds hovering over ours heads? And why do all
the sounds of the world, sound likes thousands of little beas buzzing in
my ears?
Why does my skin feel like it's crwling when I get near people, and why
does the thought of leaving my apartment make me want to puke my guts out?
Does anyone really have the answers to life? I don't think so, because
there are no answers to life.
Sometimes, I wonder why I was put here, I am worthless, I don't contribute
to anything worth living for. I am a nuisance, I'm cumbersome.
i feel so shit, my mum dismises all i say we dont even talk. im always in
my room and my dad works around the world. my mum had a drink prob. and
had 3 days left to live. i handled it but the thing is i can't handle
myself.my boyfriend keeps me positive but when im alone i feel so down. my
body gets to me a lot also.i hate my tummy and legs and im going insane
with people around me. every one is a transparent sheep!!! all clones.
i feel the same way DEBBIE. why are we here? families arent any help they
want to show love and affection but all they do is cause pain. why trust
someone when it gets thrown back in youre face in the end. u can't trust
anyone and even though i dont even have trust in mself i force myself to
keep to myself incase i get hurt. i only express myself on this because i
will never see any of u.
Is there anyone out there tonight? Is there an actual chatroom for this?
Why don't you create one Chris? You created this message board, I tumbled
on it by typing in suicide chatrooms, hoping to find a live chatroom, it
does relieve some stress by typing in here. But sometimes, I would like
some response back, because at my loneliness points, all this does is
makes me feel even more alone.
I need a real chat room...am extremely depressed...marriage
problems...have no true family...and everyone at work appear to ahet me
and doesn't have the courage to tell me, accoeding to my wife who runs the
business with me. I have no answers, all oue business, and can't afford to
divorce and can't find a purchaser of the business...I fell the best
answer is ending it all, than everyone who doesn't like me woulf be
releaved, as would my wife and her children. I've taken 3 valium 10s with
3 more waiting for me and I want to use my gun to end this misery that no
one close to me understands, but instead I feel they hold it against me
stating that I blame everything on my depression...they don't truly
understand how debilitating this illness can be,...any miracle ideas
before I folloe through?
Sorry bout the misspelling in the comments section, my email was wrong a s
well tooo, I think the valiums have kicjed in
email is traylor_business@mindspring.com
thanks & God bless yuo all...
Hi i have come here for some time and i myself have problems i can't
describe.
As i search through forums, it seems alot of you need a more instant means
of communication.
I know it can be hard for some to join in group conversations, but i hope
this helps.
My friend and i spent the last two days finding a host to post this for us
all, including you!
http://godsent.port5.com/
They say "if you build it they will come"
Please use this instant chat service/chatroom which we hope you wwill
enjoy, it's yours.
And we will add more features for our new community.
Break away from these forums and help your new chat community grow
http://godsent.port5.com/
let us know if it works ok thankyou
we will add more features daily
now you have your live chat you wanted
And dont be afraid to wait if nobody is home, someone will drop by :) good
luck
Jose, I was just in the chat room, it worked, but no one is in there
Yes it works fine now (our new flash chatroom)
We need to add more features which will be up soon
I hope you enjoy watching this community grow
Where's everybody? The chat rooms been empty for hours. Anyways, need
some1 2 talk to.Chat at
http://godsent.port5.com/
what do you think will happen if i take 150 tylonal pm.
IF U WANT A NICE CRY READ THIS....ok hows this for a fucked life, my life
all started to go bad at age 8, i was put in a mentle home for trying to
kill my parents and aculy put my dad in hospital for 2 weeks with stab
wounds, it all started when my mum has a still born baby, she started
ignoring me like i was never there, i was alone, i never went to school
cos i used to be locked in my room at night, and in the day i was alone
with a dog called ben, my only friend. i spent 3 months in asylum being
treated for skitz, they recorded each session we had and then after the 3
months of not seeing my rents or brothers, i came out into the world
feeling lost and alone, no one to go home too that would really care, they
played some of the tapes to my mum and dad and it made my mum depressed,
because she has thought about wot she had done, 5 months later my mother
killed herself and my dad disowned me and moved away with my brothers, i
went to a kids home, for 3 years and when i was 11 i was put with a family
that couldn't sleep at night after they found out wot i did, people say i
have an evil stare that just makes people on edge about me, so i went back
to the home after 2 weeks of that, but this time it was diffrent i ran
away to live on the streets for 5 years i lived under bridges and tunnels
and subways in most parts of london, not knowing anything about my past,
they say the truma of my childhood made me forget myself, i didn't have a
name or a home at the age of 16 and was taking to a sorta youth centre,
and learnt how to read and write again, and went to a sorta school to help
"people" like me they said, i was the only one in this HOME that aculy had
a real problem, listerning to people saying they were upset cos there GF
left them or they had there rents devorce at an early age, i met my best
mate TOM there who had nearly the same problems as me apart from his were
that his rents died one night in a car crash and he blamed himself because
they had an agument just b4 they went out and he thought that 3 secs would
have made a diffrence, so tom lived in the fear of that everyone blamed
him, we thought fuck the home and we ran away, and i taught him how to
live on the streets for 2 years till we were 18, no one would even dare to
come near me even on the streets because i was a skitz and had no
medication i was so easy to set off in fits and rages, i would hurt
everyone around me if they tryed to steal somin of mine or toms, when we
we 18 we decided or well he wanted to go back to the world, so we set off
to the home once again, and met the same nurse that was there that knew me
straight away, i spent 3 days in a padded cell with a straight jacket for
trying to cut open this boys thoat called ben matthews, but i ended up
cutting open my own hand when the c**t moved so i have 11 stitchs in my
right hand, 3 days in the dark, gives u time to think, about a year later
me and tom were still at the home, getting alot better, tom even had a GF,
i was 19 and never even had one, no one could even look at my face without
feeling fear for there life, how could anyone ever love me, i was a
monster at the time, tom moved out of the homw with brandy and the counsel
gave them a 1 bed small flat type thing and benifit, once again i was
alone, i had taking a liking to really loud music, cos i found i couldn't
think with it blasting in my ears and even heard lyrics that refected my
feelings, i wouldn't be aloud into the public eye for months after tom
left, i got a flat though and i met a girl called sophie that don't know
about my past, seeing as i am trying to forget it i don't really wanna
tell her, is that wrong ? would she really leave me like tom says ? we
love each other and have moved out of that one bed flat into a 2 bedroom
big flat, and we were really happy to start with, were still together but
ym mind is a tormented place and isn't used to having a GF and i am not
yet used to trusting people and things. i can't get a job for obuous
reasons, so i'm living on mental benifit, thats like 200 a month enough to
eat, soph is trying to become a newspaper person, and has a job for the
local paper and the boss person says she has a lot of spunk cos the lady
boss says she reminds her of a young her, i found having a GF is really
helping me get used to being around people, i used to not be able to walk
down the street without feeling everyone was looking at me, cos dressed
like a bum u kinda do get a few looks, but all changed, i am 21 now and
have been told i have a heart mermer and a little lung problem, comes from
sleeping around shit things, my left lung is really bad and black from
smoking butts and drinking cheep and left over drink so i can't smoke or
drink now, it;s a little strange not having to drink at night to keep
warm, (sleeping on street corners gets cold) but i have had a LIFE TIME of
pain and misery and i read some of these SO CALLED problems u have and
they seem so small, but every problems a problem and i have been helping
alot of my mates with there problems there isn't a problem u can say to me
that i havn't had (within reason) so if any of u wanna talk then just drop
me a line or somin. thanks for reading this if u aculy did read it all, i
hope to hear from u all soon, just so u know, i am suicidal and want to
die for many reasons, shit life, childghood, lonely, list goes on.....
thanks for listerning. bye
Hi. For anyone in crisis now, PLEASE go here and read this:
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
or call: 1-800-SUICIDE
Already read it or called? Read it again, or call again -- please.
I also ran across this FREE BOOK that you can download and read called
"Suicide: The Forever Decision". Go here:
http://www.qprinstitute.com/Forever.htm
and click on "Click here to download the book" at the bottom. The other
links will help you download WinZip and Acrobat Reader, if you need them.
It's only 1 meg, so it's a fairly quick download.
I haven't started reading it yet.
Don't believe anyone out there cares? Well check out this site:
http://www.spanusa.org/resources.html
which has a TON of links to just SOME of the organizations out there
wanting to help YOU. There are thousands of people who are working to help
you survive, even though they don't even know you. How's THAT for caring?
:-) See, you do matter to lots of people.
Why am I writing this? Do you think I have no idea what you are going
through (so what the hell do I know anyway)? Well, look at my post (above)
on August 20, 2003 (by "mike"). I get it. I really do.
Please check out the links above. Read the book. Call a friend or
therapist or relative to talk. Take your meds (or go get evaluated). Think
of something you can do to help someone else today or tomorrow, and go do
it. Trust me, it will help. Repeat the above as necessary.
There is a way out -- and it's not death. I promise.
Hey Debbie, thanks for your reply on Aug 25.
I know you didn't need to
read it, but lots of other flamers here did. This shit is real, and it may
help the flamers to understand it better. It may also help you and others
to realize that you are not alone. Lots of other folks are struggling like
this too, and lots of people want to help (see my post above).
Is everyone still wondering why suicide chat lines are so scarce?
Here's why:
http://www.msnbc.com/news/924292.asp
People are afraid of them for several reasons. One is liability,
another is capacity. There are too many of us that need support just to
survive, and no organization could handle it all right now. That doesn't
mean there is no help out there -- THERE IS. Again, see my posting above.
I'm just explaining why there are so few suicide chat rooms.
It appears our new site has vanished,
We can find more free hosts but we can't depend on them
I'll try put soem money into hosting for a permanent site, if that helps
anyone.
We had a few visitors to godsent.port5.com
But it's gone or the host is deleted us :( sorry i tryed.
Jose, I thought you said the new roomis gone, I was just in there, but by
the time I got there, everyone was leaving.
Oh well, that sounds about like my luck.
Ohh good Debbie, i'm happy for once,
I was typing www.godsent but that doesn't work.
http://godsent.port5.com/
Come join our new comunity if you see this people!
My life is crashing before my eyes, I know that it is my decisions that
made it come to this, but I dont have much hope left in living... the only
thing keeping me from killing myself right now, is the thought of what my
family would have to emotionaly go through if I took action to do so. But
I dont think that is going to stop me for much longer... im not even sure
why im here or why im writting this.. maybe a cry for help, I dunno ... im
18 ... but I dont think ill make it to 19 .. im a male, I dont want to be
another statistic.. but I can only handle so many negative thoughts in my
head.. and I have no reason for positive ones... sigh im at a loss for
words
I really enjoyed reading all comments and they helped me so much because
I've been suicidal for such a long time and finding company helps a lot,
it makes me feel better. I am really trying to find an easy way to do it.
I won't like to suffer too much, and I was making the decision of using
sleeping pills, but I'm not sure what type of pills I need to get and the
amount that I should use. I would like to go somewhere where nobody knows
me, so my family won't suffer, my parents, brothers and sister.
I love you all. Take care of yourselves. I will visit some of the chat
rooms you talked about and hope to meet you there.
Hello, is anyone out there tonight, I really need someone to talk to , the
only thing I can get my computer to download is this. I don't know why,
but tonight I feel the worst,
hi, i dont know why people keep putting links to chat rooms that dont
exist or dont work. The last thing anyone wants when they are suicidal is
to be f#@ked around like that. I just endured a car crash that killed my
whole family except me im only 19 and my world is crashing and u people
are bull@#!ting me .............................THANKS
Kiren, I'm really sorry about your family, I'm also sorry that you
couldn't find a real chatroom. I don't know what to say to make you feel
better, but I hope you find the help that you need. I came on here tonight
because I needed someone, but after reading your posting, I am really
short of words. I pray that you find what you need.
I just entered a depression chatroom if anyone wants to try it, I can't
promise it will work for you, but it did me.
http://www.mental-health-today.com/dep/chat/depchat.htm
So please don't
get angry if it doesn't work, a friend gave it to me, it worked when I was
there, but I can't promise anything.
I wasn't posting any false links,
I have a site built because of this group
And i spent hours looking for a free hosting service
So we could get it online, and free hosts are crap
I haven't forgot about it, i need another host
the site will be up again tomorrow on a different hosting service. ill
post the new hosts link everywhere again!
thanks for the replys Debbie and Jose, im sorry if i was mad but i really
needed to talk to someone and i couldnt, Life is really horrible at the
moment. I didnt mean for anyone to take the blame i have been so scattered
since the accident, i am not seeing the world clearly at the
moment.....................................................
Hi i spent a few hours searching for another host for
http://godsent.port5.com < as it is down alot.
I've just finished and everything is working again
The new address is
http://gscomune.cjb.net/
Easy to remember address, please let me know if
You get any problems, if it works, i guess i'll meet
Someone in the chat or in the discussions forum
This whole project is taking my mind off my troubles
GS World http://gscomune.cjb.net/
Come check out our 3d section
Maybe some of you can help out, lots of people in there allready
I think you will enjoy it, i hope to meet some of you there
Our 3d section gives you alot more options than posting on a message board
You can walk around, see other people from other countries,
Visit other peoples 3d worlds, voice enhanced chat by robotics :)
Please join us, i put alot of time into this site with all of you here in
mind
http://gscomune.cjb.net/
i went to that blaxxun site to download the 3D thingy and it won't let me,
i have tryed for hours, i know how to use a computer well and can't get it
to download the file cannot be found ??? plz someone help, either by
sending the file to my e-mail or telling wot i am doing wrong, thanks,
matt x PLEACE TO ALL YOU PEOPLE OUT THERE !
Hi, I have never posted anything on this board as I stumbled across a
similar one a few weeks ago in hopes of finding live chat and pro-suicide
messages. I am 31 years old, there is little to no hope of me ever
"recovering". I am the mother of 3 beautiful children and though I hate
the thought of leaving them motherless my own suffering and torment are
all I am able to see most of the time. I have been suicidal for 2 decades
now, I have a chemical imbalance in my brain, I am on meds that do not
help but these are the only ones I can take that do not cause weight gain,
I am a recovering anorexic but I am fearful of gaining weight still. I
have certain expectations that I must adhere to and I can't handle the
pressures anymore. I am 31, I have had three children. The guy I love does
not feel the same and is a player. I quit school, my major was Med. Admin.
Assist. program at the local community college. I am not working. I want
to die by carbon monoxide asphyxiation but have no garage or storage unit
or other airtight building to complete this plan. I do have an ancient,
crappy car though. I do not want to do anything gory and bloody, trust me,
overdose is rarely effective, I have learned that the hard way! That is
just an attention getting tactic. My romanticized, ideal fantasy suicide
that I would love to make reality: my car, cleaned nice and tidy, a warm,
aritight garage or storage area, my "suicide mix" CD, my comfy pillow,
dressed in my white lace feminine long skirt and white top, my Estee
Lauder Pleasures eau de parfum,and someone to hold me and make me feel
safe and protected like no one ever could in this miserable life. Just
turn on the engine, make sure no fresh air could come in and relax and
sleep peacefully forever. Obviously I am completely insane! I once made
the mistake of entering a suicide pact with someone who was truly
psychotic, who had no intention of killing himself but just wanted to know
what it was like to murder someone else! No, I know, if one truly wants to
die, it should not matter how it is carried out but I have felt powerless
enough in this life and want to die on my own terms! If I am to die, it
will be by my own hand! I am saddened to know there are so many others out
there hurting and feeling the way I have felt for all of these years. I do
not like to see anyone suffering. I really do believe some are just
destined to suffer. I am sorry to say that but it must be true. I am
sincere in my wish to die but as I have stated, this I may have some
control over and it will be done as closely to my plan as possible. I
never try to persuade any one else to do harm to themselves but I think I
have not been successful because I do not have another person with me.
Ugh, that sounds horrible, maybe I am just evil. I jsut want someone to
hold me and reassure me in my final moments. Also I need a garage!
AdoringAngel, I think of suicide to many minutes of my life, but my
children are the reason I hold on, do you really want your children to
suffer like that? It sounds like you have most of the same problems I do,
please don't end your life! That would kill your children, you see the
problems you have now, imagine the impact that your suicide would have on
your kids.
What if they blamed theirselfs, or the experince of losing their mother,
put them in the same or even a worst state of mind that you have. There
are reasons you feel the way you do, and committing suicide could be a
cause for your children to feel the same way.
Please reconsider.
Maybe our destiny is to feel all this pain, all this suffocation, all this
shit that life has to throw us, but give your kids a chance. They need
you.
Debbie,
Hi, Thank you for writing. Wow, 5 kids! Sometimes 2 is alot! I have
actually had 3 children but my firstborn son was stolen from me by DHS
(human services). My parental rights were terminated, due to my emotional
instability and a suicide attempt. I lost him and I greive that loss every
day. I am unable to forgive myself. I imagine him being severly abused,
starved, beaten, raped, and overall tortured by the people who got him as
they send me no information or pictures or anything, what other conclusion
is there? My son will be 10 in 2 weeks, I have not seen him since he was
18 months old. I may not ever see him again, especially if I end my life,
unless he chooses to want to find me when he is 18 years old! The state is
corrupt, I was not given any choices, no chance to get help, just my son
ripped from my arms. I now have a 6 year old boy, who is about to turn 7
and a 5 year old little girl. They are very precious to me, I love them
beyond all measure. I wish I were more responsible, I sometimes feel that
they would be better off in the long run without me and my psychotic
episodes. Then the issue with the guy I love that does not return the same
feelings, I allow myself to be used by him but I feel as if I cannot
resist him. I know looks are not everything but he is so gorgeous, I have
so much lust and passion for him that I never felt with the kids' Dad. I
always act before thinking about the consequences of my actions, I feel at
times I am living a double life, I am ashamed to admit this but I
sometimes in a subtle way try to hold on to the kids' Dad because he is
like a 2nd Father to me and offers me the security that the guy I love
does not! I must be evil. I know it is wrong to use someone. I have never
before in my life ever intentionally hurt anyone, other than myself. Just
curious, have you ever heard of Borderline Personality Disorder? That
along with severe depression, dysthymia (chronic depressed mood), and
anxiety disorder is my diagnosis. Fun! I never asked for any of this. Some
of it is hereditary too, if I have passed any of these brain diseases to
my innocent children I really will want to just die! I have a chemical
imbalance too which compicates this. I feel like such a loser, I withdrew
from school fall semester, I am not working, and I get in such bad
depressions where I do not even want to leave my house for anything. I
know my babies need me. They are so beautiful and sweet. Still I wonder
how you can manage 5! I really admire that!
I feel like killing myself but never go all the way
my body cant take the pain, i worry about everything.
no one believes im depressed, they think im just in a phase, i feel alone,
lost, confused, im never happy, i put this facade on and pretend as if
this pain was just going to go away, but it hasnt, my parents have done a
lot for me and i thank them, my siblings have put up with my attitude. no
one hears me. im destined to walk alone, be alone forever. every day i
play out in my head if i were to die, how would i meet death? how would
everyone react to me gone? my bed untouched and sheets cold, my work left
alone for no more eyes to view it, my school books left in a pile in the
corner of the room, my body numb, my eyes bloodshot from tears, im lying
in my own pain, this feeling never leaving, i dont take any medication,
and i never tried to get counciling, i feel like it wont work, its just a
load of crap to me. why was i put here? chosen this body, this ugly sack
of skin. every morning i ask myself why didnt i end it last night. why
didnt it go away. i dont need people telling me it will be ok, they dont
know how much it hurts. sometimes i feel like someone else has taken over
me, playin games, hurting me intentionally.
let me breathe this one last breath and end it now.
no one believes im depressed, they think im just in a phase, i feel alone,
lost, confused, im never happy, i put this facade on and pretend as if
this pain was just going to go away, but it hasnt, my parents have done a
lot for me and i thank them, my siblings have put up with my attitude. no
one hears me. im destined to walk alone, be alone forever. every day i
play out in my head if i were to die, how would i meet death? how would
everyone react to me gone? my bed untouched and sheets cold, my work left
alone for no more eyes to view it, my school books left in a pile in the
corner of the room, my body numb, my eyes bloodshot from tears, im lying
in my own pain, this feeling never leaving, i dont take any medication,
and i never tried to get counciling, i feel like it wont work, its just a
load of crap to me. why was i put here? chosen this body, this ugly sack
of skin. every morning i ask myself why didnt i end it last night. why
didnt it go away. i dont need people telling me it will be ok, they dont
know how much it hurts. sometimes i feel like someone else has taken over
me, playin games, hurting me intentionally.
let me breathe this one last breath and end it now.
AdmiringAngel, I too admire you, all though you feel the way you do, you
have lived this long for your kids. If you read all the postings here,
then you know my kids aren't with me right now. That makes it all worst, I
haven't sen them since Christmas. I know how you feel, I also find it hard
to leave my home, I force myself out of bed and into the showers. My
nerves and stress are destroying my body, I stay constipated for 2 weeks
at a time, because of thyroid disease I went from 130 pounds to 200 pounds
in two weeks, that also depresses me, last sumer I was in size 10 jeans,
and now I'm in 18. I made my weight back down to 175, maybe I'll make
more, I don't know.
I have no job, no money to take my astranged husband to court to fight
over my kids.
Where I live, jobs are hard to find.
The thought of getting older drives me crazy, alot of my childhood
memories sadden me into a state, that I hate being around people. I feel
like I'm in a deep whole, and there's nothing around me but blackness, I
can't remember ever having a happy time that lasted longer than a few
minutes, because painful thoughts always over run them. All the time, I
feel like the world would be better off without me. Angel, somewhere
inside you is a strong women, one that lets you live today for your kids,
try everyway to hold on to her. Trust me, I know how hard that is, I fight
everday to keep that part of me, it's a hard on going battle. I wish there
was some miracle pill, but there isn't, because if there was, then
everyone would be cured, and would be happy all the time. I wish I was.
Debbie,
Thanks for writing. I keep checking this board for some reason and I am
happy to see that you wrote again. I still want to die, I know I have my
kids who need me but I guess it is true when people say a person can't
live their life for someone else. I know I am selfish, I am placing my
pain and suffering over that of my children. My Mom will take care of them
and reassure them that I love them so much. I keep thinking of death as
magikal somehow and my spirit would be with them even stronger than my
flesh and blood body that is here with them, but just wanting death to
come. I know that sounds crazy, gee, maybe that is why I have been to the
psych ward 20 times in 20 years. I do not want to go back, though the
nurses and doctors know me so well, it is almost like a vacation there. I
just want to spare myself the embarassment and do it right this time. I do
not hear voices, the radio does not send secret messages to me, I do not
feel that paranoid or irrational but I do feel like I am stared at a lot.
I am 5'9, 135 lb. I wear junior's size 7/8 or 9/10 if I can find jeans
long enough. But I am a 34DD. I know to some this does not sound like too
much of a horrible problem but I feel like a freak. I get dirty looks from
women, lewd looks from men, comments from little kids that do not know any
better. I do not even want to leave my home. I used to be so active, I
used to like walking on the nature trail that is by my apartment, I just
do not get any joy out of anything anymore except my kids. So much
emphasis is placed on physical appearance, I was conditioned at a young
age to realize this. My Dad verbally and emotionally sexually abused my
sister and I, no actual physical contact directly but to this very day he
preaches the importance of maintaining a "skinny little hardbody". He is
starting to push these perverted beliefs on to my 5 year old daughter who
says she does not want to get fat because Grandpa won't love her anymore
if she did. She would not even have an ice cream cone at Dairy Queen. I am
just so fucked up. Pardon my language, I try not to be so unlady-like but
that is an accurate description. I graduated high school(a long time ago)
with a 3.8 GPA, my Dad has never said he is proud of anything I have aver
accomplished but he did tell me that I have a nice perfect little ass! It
is very damaging for a person to hear things like that from their own
Father. When I became pregnant my Dad's reaction was not joy of becoming a
Grandpa, he said" Great, now you've ruined your body forever!" Well,
obviously this still affects me, I guess lately I have not even been
consciously thinking about that issue. I do not do anything to please
anybody else anymore. I try to be a good Mom to my kids, I know I am
failing at that as well.I am doing all I can do to continue drawing
breath. I just don't want to go on anymore. I do not want some bloody,
gory death, I want to be able to have some sort of veiwing before
cremation, so my kids would be able to see me intact, just looking as if I
am asleep. I think my Dad would be happy, at last I would be a perfect,
beautiful skeleton! He also says I am a parasite to society for getting
SSDI for my lifelong, biological mental condition. See, I would be taking
care of that as well!
Angel, I won't try to convince you that your life is worth living,,
because I have trouble believing that mine is worth living. But as long as
you live, I hope to keep seeing your postings. I came in here the first
time looking for help, then I realized this room was made as a joke for
someone to make fun of suicide, but then I read all the posting and
realized also, that most of the posting are people needing help, or people
who have or have had the same problems, and feel the same way. I come in
here to relieve some of my feelings, it's help only a little, but a little
is better than nothing. I wonder sometimes, if the people who post are
real, or if it is just the person who created this room, just trying to
get a responce.
My parents have always been good to me, it was my grabdfather who made my
childhood a living hell, and the kids that I went to school with. I wrote
about all that before, so I won't bore anyone with the same story again.
You shouldn't worry about what your dad says to you, you are beautiful no
matter what you look like.
Debbie,
That is terrible that someone started this as a joke, but whatever the
motive it has brought people with similar problems together. At least it
is not preaching about God, I am sorry, I know I "should" be a Christian
but I cannot believe in what I do not see or feel. I am tired tonight, I
take my kids to daycare at 4 a.m. though I do not work yet and dropped out
of school for the second time, I need my breaks during the day and plus
they catch the bus from their daycare center with all of their friends. I
have just recently found this board and another one like it so I do not
know what you have posted before. May I ask, why are your children not
with you? I miss my son so much. Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
Matt I can meet you on yahoo or whatever and send blaxxun to you.
I don't know was my site a good idea because nobody is using it
I'm looking for any ideas for the site that will make it more intresting
to you guys.
I imagin as a group we all could have some good times!
My site's not about death or killing yourself, but the idea for creating
it arrose from me visiting this site.
It would be nice to have soem support or even if i geve someone admin
rights to the site you could do anything you liked, other than that i'll
delete it.
Jose, I'm sorry I have visited your site, and I found it very interesting,
but in the state of mind I'm in, I'm just usually looking for confort, or
a place to pour my feelings out. I usually don't feel like doing anything
else, it isn't that I don't like your site, because thats not the reason I
don't go there. I can't speak for everyone else here, most people are
usually looking for the same thing I am, and if their like me, they have
no enthusaism to do anything else. I barely go or do things with my
boyfriend, because I don't feel like it, I force myself out of bed, the
biggest tasks I do in days, is lay around listening to music, I lay with
my tv on, but I can't keep focused enough to watch a whole movie, or keep
up with whats going on. Then I get on here, and come to this chatroom, or
look up information on depression, or information on other problems I
have. Your site is interesting, but people have to me in the mood, or they
won't visit.
FUCK LIFE!! im fuckin sick of it. I can't take this anymore. Bye everyone
Have a fuckin good life
Don't fuck up!
It sucks. If someone hurts you tell them to fuck off and hurt them back.
If someone abuses you. push up back. Stand up for yourself! Good luck with
your life...It will be better than mine
Bye
I really am sad that anyone else feels this way, and I have no words of
wisdom or sage advice or grand reason to keep living, I cannot convince
anyone to live if they choose not to want to exist anymore, just like I
cannot convince anyone to commit suicide if they don't really have the
desire to. I think maybe people should try to get help at least twice and
if they have made an honest attempt and still feel like dying then end
their suffering if they really want to. Take me with you, if you are
sincere in doing it, C'mon, How about my garage idea? It is painless (I am
guessing) and it is not yucky and bloody? If someone is going to carry
through with a suicide they can ease the suffering of one more person. I
am really not trying to be insensitive and maybe I am the only one who is
beyond all hope and help. But there are some people who are actually
successful at this and have found peace that they were seeking. See, I am
insane. Sorry. I am the only one who DESERVES to die, not you people here,
just me. It has gone too far with me. I am completely without hope.
It's ok,
I just thought i'd try make a few friends,
That's way i made the site http://gscomune.cjb.net/
I feel like shit today, i've been left down really bad.
And that's just added to my troubled mind.
I think friends help but they let you down more,
Especially when you think you can talk to someone you thought was there
for you and you actually relize, you're on your own again.
No one to turn to but the corner of a darkened room
I'm actually trying to stop thinking of hanging myself
I don't know how my mind is working today
I hope i'm here tomorrow but what's the point.
I hate myself. I want to commit suicide.
sometimes ppl feel as if they have no one to talk to. then you go on the
internet and find a site like this. its a place to let off steam and tell
the world how you feel. its hard to live when you dont want to live, its
hard to bear the fact that ppl think that ur insane, its hard to even
imagine the fact that ppl actually care if you life or die, i feel as if
the only ppl in this world that care, are the ppl who dont know me. the
ppl who take the time and read the pathetic things that i have to write
and answer back, its amazing to think, that someone you dont know and have
never met can help you deal with the pain. i read almost everthing that
was on here today...feeling as awful as ever to think that maybe i could
help someone, then i thought...how the hell can i help someone if they
cant help me? then i understood it, if we dont want to be helped...why ask
for it? if we need help...we should seek it out, not sit here and say that
we need help yet not go and look for it. i;ve attepmted suicide so many
times i lost count...and as you can tell...fuckin a...im still here. i
hate the fact that i quit when i was almost gone, that i went to the
hopsital, that my friends called the police. why must life be so
painful??? i need to understand why life is supposadly the best thing
ever. and why we should be greatful to live on this rock. i just dont
understand...to me...life has no meaning
Hey dad, listen to me.
Did you raise me accordingly?
I know you think I'm wasting my time...
But it hurts that you won't listen.
I'm trying hard to fake..
that i'm alright.
No one can change me.
I've lost it all.
I can't be perfect.
It's much too late...
I'm looking back.
I'm sorry I can't be perfect.
I'm trying not to think...
Did you know, you use to be my hero?
The rest of the family's sore.
I know you don't care anymore.
You all think I just lie.
I'm such an easy target...
It's easy to just blame me.
I don't stand up for myself.
I know there is no point.
Nothing that I say you believe.
I try hard to fake it.
I just want you not to yell.
I can't stand another fight.
I've lost it all.
Where I go, it's dark.
I'm not even close to perfect.
Now it's much too late,
I'm looking back.
I'm sorry I can't be perfect.
THe world isn't perfect, no one is perfect, only you can control you. Only
you can decide what is best in your life, everyone is put on earth without
choice, God puts us here, to end your life would be a ticket to hell. No
one likes everything that goes on in their lifes, but sitting around and
drowning in your own sorrow is your choice. You can control what you do
everyday, no one can make you live or feel the way they want you to.
People go crazy, and they can't control that, but depresses, suicidal
people can at least rty to get help. They're not so crazy that they don't
know what they're doing. They do know what they are doing, because they're
not crazy. They still have a mind.
You think your at your end, that's only because you made yourself believe
that. Try to get a grip and hold on, I know it's hard, because I consider
suicide everyday,,,,, but I hold on because, I never had the choice to
come into this life, and I don't have the choice to go out of it. Eternity
in hell would be my reward, fire and brimstone would be what I was ending
my life for, things wouldn't get easier. In fact, there would be no
escaping hell eternity in hell. You would hate that, but you wouldn't be
able to escape that, like you would life.
Pick up a bible and read it, and think that if it wasn't real, then how
would someone know, that everything that has happened in this life was
going to happen. One hell of a psychic, I guess. My bible speaks of hell,
and i believe it. People, don't end your life, give God a chance, go to
church, try that, then if that doesn't work, do whatever you think.
How are we here?, if there is no God, how do we exist? I know, no one
wants to be preached to, but what else can we do. You don't have to
believe, but if yo do, give God a chance, gotta be better than killing
yourself. How bad could believing in God be? gotta be better than hurting
your families and friends, gotta be worth trying to live for.
ANNOUNCEMENT
I've finally installed a live chat room for you guys to
use.
If you scroll to the top of the screen here and over to the right hand
side, you'll see a button that says "Suicide Chat". Click that button and
you'll be taken to a real, live chat room where you can register your
screen names and chat your brains out.
The direct link is http://lurid.org/chat/phpMyChat.php3
--Christopher
Great. Believe in God. Then what?
life is really shit i am OD on anti depressants to make them work, the doc
says don't do more than 3 and i take 9/10 a day and just get high and
happy, it is effecting my memory and i am starting to forget my life and
my family names i have forgotten my mothers name, my GF has left me and
now begged me to come back to her i aggreed and now she doesn't want me
back, y is she doing this to me it just seems she wants me to suffer, i
smoke too much because it used to calm me but now i need to smoke 100's to
do it, i am coming to the end of the line, i have tryed to kill myself 5
times unsucsessfuly, each time i got found or stopped, plz cam someone
talk to me as i have no friends left that care or want me, plz there must
be someone out there who feels trhe same, e-mail me with the subject "I'LL
HELP" in CAPS to mwako2@aol.com thank you,
Well, if you truelly believe in God, you wouldn't feel this way, because
God answers prayers. And you would have a reason to live, because then you
would be scared to go to hell. Who would want their soul to burn in hell
for eternity? not me. Because even though your earthly body will be here
rottening in the ground, your soul will go on, it's your choice as to
where it goes, heaven or hell.
Put your faith in God,, that's what, let him help, let him help you
survive, give him a chance. That's just a suggestion, I don't want to
offend anyone, or make them mad, your believes are up to you. I just want
to try to help, I don't know how to do that, I'm sorry. I do not want to
offend anyone, so please don't take that the wrong way.
People. your life is your life, don't end it just because things in your
life aren't going as planned, my life is so fucked up, it isn't funny, I'm
depressed, I hate everything about me, I look in the mirror, and wish I
was someone else. I am so embarrassed to go out into public, because I
feel ugly. I hang my head when I walk past men, or if I'm standing by
another woman, I feel as if I don't even compare, and I'm only humiliating
myself by trying to communicate. I feel that people think I'm trying to
fit in, and I should just hide myself from the world. I cut, perm and die
my hair trying to find a look I like, I try dieting and it always fails. I
hate that I can't wear sexy, fashionable clothes.
I fear that my conversations that I have with people, are just stupid,
because I never know what to say, I'm a piece of shit, trying to fit in
with a dozen roses. Everyone tells me I'm beautiful, guys always ask me
out, but still I feel, I'm shit. I have no job, can't seem to find one, I
hate the world. I don't fit in, I'm useless to mankind, I give nothing, I
try not to take nothing, because I don't desrve to have it. I want to be
skinny and beautiful, I want to be able to wear sexy, stylish clothes,
when I stand near another woman, I want to know men are looking at me
also, and not just her. I want to be smiled at, I want to be told everyday
how good I look. I want a life worth living, I don't want to feel like the
world is my enemy. I want to hear from my family, your looking good, and
not, I see you eat well. I want to feel young, even though I'm in my 30's,
I want to be able to give to my kids, and know they love me, I want the
best possible for my kids, I want the best possible for all my loved ones.
I want to wake up and be able to do something good, and be proud by the
time night rolls in, I want to feel like I have accomplished something. I
want to give and be proud, I want to help people, and not just lay around
in bed all day, and waste my life, I need energy, I need enthusiasm, I
need encouragement, I need the strenth, I need the love for life.
I pray to God but nothing really happens. I have concentration problems
and when I pray, there's just a blankness in my head that I can't do
anything about. Fear of hell is not going to make suicide any less
desirable, the pain and anxiety will be there only there will be more
because of fear of hell. I never chose to be on this earth, and if God
wants to throw me in a pit of fire so I can i burn forever just because I
didn't think about him enough or believe in him enough, well the God's an
unreasonably sick f*cker and there's nothing I can do about it. I don't
see how heaven's going to be any better, I mean, don't you think it'll get
a little boring in heaven after you're first 800 trillion years there?
very true and can u get kicked out if u missbehave heavan isn't worth it,
and i can't see how satan will punish us for doing his work i think hell
is a paradise for people that kill and murder because satan is evil y
would he punish us ??? it makes no sence
Satan is in hell, because God put him there for his punishment, he wasn't
there because he wanted to be. The bible tells, that when you go to
heaven, you have no bad thoughts, infact, you won't even remember your
eartly encounters, you have no pain and no sorrow, there is no way of
feeling any of thse things. I'm sure that when people go to hell, that
there going to think it's paradise. I don't think anyone wants to feel the
pain of burning forever, non stop. Why would God have to be a unreasonably
sick f!!!er as you said, he gives everyone a choice, it's up to you. God
gave us his only son, and his son gave his life for us, that wasn't fair
but it happened. And just starting to pray, isn't going to help, you have
to believe, and soon, the spirit of God will enter your soul. It isn't
going to come easy, give to God, and he will give to you.
screw god, my mum and dad r dead they died in a car crash killing them
slowly, god is just a power mad sick f!!!er he should be the one in hell
not us, how can u preach to us saying ot hell and heavan is like u have no
idea the bible is full of flaws and should be burnt u can't prove he is
real in the bible it says if u prove he is real he will not exist, so
either way it is full of shit like you god loving fucks wasting ur life
following a book, u might as well follow a cook book and belive that gravy
is god,
where is everyone gone it has been 2 days and no one has posted nething,
has everyone got suddenly better and got over all the death business or
have they all killed themself and no one is left to talk, or is there a
drug that someone is taking and suddly got better if so I WANT SOME :( if
anyone wants to chat my e-mail is "mwako2@aol.com" in the subject line put
"RE: HELP" in caps like that and i will listern to you and ur problems,
hope to hear from someone soon, LOVE TO YOU ALL "god isn't real if u want
help u have to look for it, not pray and hope something happens" remember
that, ne god loving freaks "F**K OFF" these people need real help from
REAL people not a book or a higher being. hope to hear from u people soon
i am here to help i had problems but from talking to people and taking
advise i got better, i am not perfictly cured but i am getter there, ttys
x
matt
When you need a vacation,
Visit GSWorld, virtual communities...
GSWorld is just a gateway to new worlds.
[REMOVED BY SITE ADMIN]
Matt don't talk like that bout the guy
You're gonna answer to in the next life.
I believe because i'm scared if i don't,
And if there is some higher power out there,
I'd of spent my whole life without any faith :-l
Hope to meet you all in 3d
Jose
something is wrong with my copm or somin, my Iternet exploring says it
doesn't surport JAVA and i donno how to sort it out ? can some one help, i
have Iternet explorer 6 and it should have it wots wrong, and jose, i am
going to hell i am counting on it, i will do nething to get there, i
belive that it;s not a punishment and that it is aculy a bliss, how can
satan punish us for standing up to god like he once did he would reward us
for trying to destroy and corrupt his world, thats wot i belive, i am
satanic and belive in him as our real god,
matt
p.s don't hate me for my beliefs we all belive in difrent things, the
question u should be asking is "why are u right" there are 100's of
religions y are u right, ? don't shoot the messanger,
p.s.s please help with the internet problem i wanna do the 3D walk
around thing...
i cant fuckin stand it. i just cant take this shit no more. this guy ok i
told him about cutting and i thought he understood why i told himbecause
he did it too..so i thought well he'll understand..instead he criticized
me about it...he told me that i was insane and needed help he wa the one
who fuckin told me to go and talk to him about this shit cuz i was
depressed. then he wrote me a letter saying tha i should move on and i
think that means to get over him and i am fucking over him...i've been
over him for a long time now but he still thinks i want him!!! what the
hell is wrong with the world that they seem to hold a prejudice against me
because i've fuckin cut?!?!?!?!?!!!??!?!?!?!? i cant take life anymore and
the fact that this damn earth is thinking that im fucking insane...what
the hell do i do? do i just sit here and take the criticism that i've
gotten for so long? i belive in God, and I talk to him...but damn
sometimes its hard to tell him things and stop from doing it. please
ppl...help me
I haven't been in here in a while, I haven't felt like it, don't feel like
getting on a damn computer, that takes no energy, oh well.
The comments about Satan and God, everyone is entitled to his or her own
opinion.
I myself believe in God, I pray to him all the time,
no matter how shitty or how bad I feel, I will never stop believing in
God.
I don't understand why the things go on in my life aren't fair, no matter
how hard I try to improve the things in my life, no results happen, I'm
getting closer and closer into ending it. I won't fail, this I know,
because if I do it, it's gonna be something fail safe. Maggz, I don't
think you are insane, don't let anyone put you down like that, you are as
normal as anyone, you just have trouble handling your problems, that is
not insane, people like us, we just have to try harder than the rest,
beacause for some it comes easy.
Me, I think my luck is running out, something good better happen in my
life soon, or I'll be in hell with Satan, and trust me, I don't look
forward to it.
By the way, I think people prove God is real everyday, and he still exist.
I don't no where it says, prove God exist, then he won't. To me, people
prove he is real everyday, just like people prove Satan is real.
How could you believe in Satan and not God?
Matt, I am not putting you down, ok, I believe the same, there are alot of
religions out there, who knows which one is right. All I can say pick one,
no one knows whats right or wrong, just believe in what you feel is right.
I don't feel nothing bad about you Matt, for what you believe, you are the
same as me, human, and I'm glad that you are partially cured, it is good
to know that there is help, and I hope I can find some before it's to
late.
But please don't put down the people who believe in God, that is there
right, they feel like maybe this information will help, they are not
trying to hurt anyone. They too, like you just want to help, and they feel
like God might be some help.
Jose,, everytime I try to go to that 3d thing, all I get is a half white
and half black screen, I even downloaded the blaxxum thing. I know little
about computers, please tell what I'm doing wrong? I just get angry trying
to get in there, then I want to break my computer.
When I click trying to get out of that page, a popup comes and wants me to
order something for $49.00. What is that?
The thing it keeps wanting me to order is called
tera-byte, I just wanted to visit your 3D world, not spend money.
debbie, i am not putting them down i just get so angry u can belive in
something so BLINDLEY where in the world has NEONE proved he is real, if u
mean the mircles and cures and stuff thats all crap, life is just one big
show that we play a part in, it's all a show we can either take control
and be the leading part or we can be sad and depressed standing in the
backround in the dark where no one sees us, i have lived my whole life in
the shadows cos of wot i belive in people don't accpet me for being
satanic, they think i am gonna steal there babys or try and drink there
blood in some stanic ritual when if u aculy knew nething about wot we do
we ask satan for guidance and power to do things for ourselfs, people that
ask god to do things for them are just lazy good for nothings, satanics
aculy summon power to do things for urself, i used a ritual to get the
courage to ask my boss for a raise and the next day when i asked him i got
a 14% raise i have the power within me to get wot i want no ask some false
idol to do it for me and bring me wealth and power i have it already
within me, i am skitzaphnic, a depressant, i see and hear things, i have
been in and out of mental homes since i was 8, my life has been hard
andimposable to cope with, i have thoughts of dying each day and every min
i have a spare moment to think, i take extream sports such as motocross,
sky diving, swiming with sharks because i have not a fear of dying, i
belive in fate i was born to do something, may that be killing people or
saving the world i was born to do it for a reason, each one of us has a
part in life, u play ur's and i play mine, don't tell me how to live my
life because i don't tell you how to live ur's, people who belive in god,
just take a min to think, wot u are doing, u are shutting ur eyes and
talking in ur head, wot u are doing is the same as people in mental homes
how can god alow such things as sept 11th or children dying or sucide, u
say he gave us free choice and i will punch u, so called wot adam and eve
did is no reason to punish us for there mistakes they choice to follow a
talking snake, that just sounds stupid in it's self i am gonna go now b4 i
upset myself and people..
matt
CAUTION!!!
The 3dworld site advertised by Jose above installs at least
one piece of Spyware on your computer. The installer program tried to
install Gator on my machine, which is known spyware.
Read about what Gator does here:
http://simplythebest.net/info/spyware/gator_spyware.html
Jose, until you remove all spyware from your site, I will not allow you
to advertise it here. I have removed all references to it in this post.
Thanks.
--Christopher
lurid.org admin
Matt, I didn't try to tell yo how to live your life, infact, I think I
told you, I don't hate you for your believes, I also told you I think of
you as I think of myself, and everyone else here. Your religion and
believes are just different than mine, I believe in god, but I'm not a
Christian.
I actaully do what I please, because to me everything I do now is a sin,
until I give myself to God, the one I believe in.
I get into witchcraft, I have satanic friends, I have wicca friends, I
also have christian friends, the things they do are their choices. I kind
of like drinking my boyfriends blood, as sick as that may sound. To me,
it's a good aphrodeshiac, or however you spell it. I won't discuss
religion with you, because that is not why I am here. I just said don't
put down the people who believe in God.
By the way Matt, to me, you sound like a really good person, one who
actually is doing something I have trouble doing right now, that is
finding help.
So please don't be angry with me, I don't want to make a enemy out of
someone that is actually willing to listen, I need friends not enemies.
dont we ALL have a secret inside of us about dying, onecomment iread the
person said i have never thought about killing myself. well that person is
lying, if you dig deep u will remember a time maybe only once when u said
god i just wished i was dead. well people i am thirty six and i do want to
die......
thanks debbie sorry i sounded angry but as u know we all have diffrent
ways of showing how we need help, it has taken me YEARS to ask for help
and i strill havn't. i am doing this all on my own, i moved out and into a
house with 5 other people all my closest mates THATS HOW I AM GETTING
BETTER, being around people that care, i have hurt my family by not
letting them know where i am, they have no idea but accpet that i am
leading my own life the people i am with care about me laods enough to
stay up at night and listern to wot i have to say as i do the same for
them as they have problems too, my GF alice is a great help, she makes me
feel so good about myself, only the other day when i was depressed and
wanted to be alone that night, the next morning she brought me breakfast
in bed to try and make me happy and it did we sat there eating together
and cuccling up listerning to music, having a partner is such a help to me
and my friend always smile and pass a joint my way to help, i am not
saying this to make people start smoking pot but it really helps me
balance out, it makes me thin deep thoughts and makes me see how i have
such a great life living with people, all i can say is i hope all of u can
be as happy as i am, as for god, i don't belive but i understand how some
people ca, but i will never understand faith after all the bad things that
happen they still belive, nm neway if u wanna talk debbie in more private
state, e-mail me @ "mwako2@aol.com" and put the subject as "DEBBIE FROM
SUICIDE CHAT" so i know who u are cos i get tons of junk mail ok ttys
hopefully, love you all
matt
my life sucks and im going to commit suicide
im goin gto jump off a building
christoper, you're wasting ur time, fair enough ur doin a security check
on my site, the only thing i've used is a redirectory url to shrten my web
site address to what it is and.... i'm sorry about any adds that poped up,
any free services displays adds on peoples pages, not my doing, id advise
anyone to install spy bot search and distroy its free.
Debbie it
shouldnt be any trouble once uv got blaxxun contact, millions use it with
no trouble.
And like i said, the adds that pop up came with my free site i put
together because of this site and others, i have no intension of spying or
misuseing or misleading anyone
I'll ask around the 3d communities for some help
sorry about the adds again,
Ok christopher, i'll find another redirectory service with no adds
hopefully
I just want to interduce you guys to a whole different experience
online, it round years
you basicaly got the chat working debbie, all you're missing is the 3d
screen over that
Uninstall blaxxun from ad/remove programs
I'll have a look for another version of blaxxun
It's fun in 3d, i made a 3d mansion for the enterance, you can choose
places and goto other worlds and meet lots of people.
thats all im advertising
MATT i mailed you a few weeks back from jpaterson98
i see we're all still alive at least *laughs*
jose--
I have no problem with popups or ads for a free service. I just
have an ethical problem with allowing a site to be advertised here that
installs spyware on user's machines.
Maybe you don't realize what is happening, but I'd urge you to check
out what gator's application really does and think about using something
else. I don't know if gator has any legitimate uses, but it is definitely
spyware.
Good luck with your site. :)
--Christopher
lurid.org Admin
Jose, I'm trying to get into your 3D world, because I figure it maybe
something new. The only thing I ever do, is get on my computer, so I
figure maybe find something new to do on here.
I hope that playing with my computer will somehow inspire me to get off of
my ass and actually start living, maybe you all know what I'm talking
about.
Christopher, you have the power to erase this stuff on here, up above on
one of my posting, my post it button got stuck or something, and it posted
it several times, could you please erase some of those and leave it just
once, it really aggravates me to see my same posting 2 or 3 times.
It would also give you more room.
I'm sorry about doing that.
I'm really in a shitty mood today, so I'm just trying to find things to
write about, to waste time, because if I don't do something, then I'm
going to lose my mind. I felt this way for days, and it's making me crazy.
Christopher i agree about gator, it's hardly of any use to anybody and
it's anoying to get popups on a page you just visited, i allway! try to
use free services(hosts) for my designs, that doesnt have any adds or spy
crap waiting to install on ur system when u visit pages, this is actually
the biggest treat to people these days(adds/popups), i've just got online
now so i'm gonna find a better service, The adds(popups) arent comming
from my host, they are comming from the short redirect url service which
is my site. and they are cjb.net if you want to check what im using them
for. i'll actualy mail them and tell them their service is bad with the
adds they use.
Debbie, i'm the same, it's my hobbies online that stop me from cracking
up. I have a feeling when you guys see what can be done in 3D you'll be
intrested to create something yourself.
I might put up another chatroom or message box just to keep in touch or
leave messages about my site's progress. i wont put up a link anywhere
else untill i get rid of the adds.
the pic on the home page is me btw in 3D
Christopher i should explai how this works to everyone, although some
might know this allready.
i built a website and hosted it at spaceports.com
The url to my site origionally is
http://scorpius.spaceports.com/~gs/world.html
Which i think is to much to remember for people,
So, i find a free redirect url service and get a shorter url to replace
above url^
The problem is that most free services make you use adds or banners on
your pages or pop up windows, i dont want that so im not using cjb.net any
more.
I found this tonight, http://www.smartredirect.com/
They do the same redirect url service but give you achoice of what type of
advertisement they make you display - when someone surfs to your page.
I've chosen a frame Christopher, it's a banner on my page directing to
http://www.smartredirect.com/
So no more unwanted popups, im tryin my best to advertise my new site
without to much problems for the visitors, but everything i do, i try to
keep it free, without adds and what have ya, it's hard.
so if you dont mind Christopher, here's my new link the the same world...
http://gsworld.allreal.net/
or http://www.gsworld.allreal.net/
is it ok with you guys i mean no adds ?
3D chat gives you a voice :)
Okay, I've spent way too much time reading this post. Here's my armchair
shrink analysis:
Suicide Wannabe Type A: Teenaged angst. My parents
suck, I don't fit in, wahhh.
Guess what? We've all been there. It was no fun. You deal with it, and
one day you grow out of it. Try writing in a journal or actually talking
to your peers. Really suicidal? Talk to your school guidance counsellor.
Suicide Wannabe Type B: I make bad decisions. I'm a hard luck case. Bad
boyfriends, can't keep a job, parenthood's too demanding, etc. Woe is me.
Suck it up! Deal with the consequences of your actions. Talk to a
pastor or a mental health professional and learn to make better decisions.
And grow the hell up.
Suicide Wannabe Type C: Had a recent run of bad luck totally beyond my
control. Parents just died. Lost a baby. Laid off.
Go see a mental health professional -- you need counselling and maybe
short-term meds. Things'll get better. Friends can help, as can other
projects to get your mind off your pain -- volunteer at a hospital. Visit
a nursing home. You'll be stronger for surviving this.
Suicide Wannabe Type D: Mental problems throughout life. Depression,
violence. Maybe a past victim of abuse.
You need help ASAP. It will not get better without professional help.
You need LIFELONG medication and therapy...before you hurt somebody.
I have sympathy for the teen angst folks. I was there. I laid on my
bathroom floor and cried and prayed that God would kill me right that
second. I was fat and had acne and bad teeth and didn't fit in. And ya
know what? Probably 2/3 of my class did the exact same thing. It's a
stage. You'll get over it.
I have sympathy for the sudden bad luck folks. I've been there, too. I
miscarried at 3 months and it damn near destroyed me. Sometimes things
will happen to remind me of it and I'll cry and ask why and yell at God.
But if you take it one day at a time and rely on your friends and other
distractions to get you through it, you'll come out the other side just
fine.
I have sympathy and real concern for the lifelong mental folks. My
grandmother was mentally ill, and it was horrible for her and her kids.
She really suffered and died alone. If she had just taken her
medication....
But the people who whine because they made bad choices and now are
suffering the consequences -- I've got no use for you. Buck up. You hang
with the wrong crowd, shack up with people you know are bad for you, do
drugs, are financially irresponsible, and want to blame everybody else...
Grow the hell up. Yeah, your life sucks. Stop doing stupid shit. Get your
life in order.
Last but not least...nobody's troubles are so bad that you have to end
your life. Suicide is not an option. It doesn't fix anything. What, you
think you're gonna feel better when you're dead? You're DEAD!!! You don't
feel better! The only way to *feel better* is to deal with the friggin'
problems that got you to this point. There's nothing that can't be dealt
with in a satisfactory way. May not be YOUR PREFERRED way, but you can't
have everything you want -- you just deal with what you've got.
I doubt there's a person on here that doesn't have a family
member...parent, child, cousin, great-uncle, grandparent, half-sister...
SOMEBODY who would be hurt by your death (by your own hand or by fate).
You've got a friend, a neighbor, a pet, a teacher, an old flame... It's
one thing to have your own pain, but it's another to want to inflict your
pain on others. Why would you want to do that to someone who cares about
you?
You think nobody cares about you? I do. May have some tough-love to
offer you, but I do care. If I could reach out and give a healing hug to
whoever's reading this and needs one, consider yourself hugged. But I'm
not going to solve your problems. Nobody can do that but you yourself. Do
whatever you have to do to make yourself feel better. And remember,
suicide's only gonna make you feel dead. It doesn't fix anything.
Get off the damned computer. Get out a notebook and make a list of what
makes you sad. Make another list of what you can do to address those
problems. And if you're seriously thinking about offing yourself, put
"talk to a suicide hotline person or some kinda counsellor" at the top of
your To-Do list. Do something proactive instead of this "misery loves
company" hanging-out-in-chat-rooms crap.
Nobody can make you happy but YOU. Do something about it.
Off the soapbox,
Becky
oh u mailed me then plz can u mail me again i get so much junk mail i
delete most things without reading them, canu put "3d world" in the
subject line then i will know, thanx
matt
Becky,
Sounds like you got all the answers to life, good for you, gald you can
just scratch your ass and go on, gald that you know that our problems can
be solved easy. And the comment about making the wrong choices, yeah they
made their choices, but you never know if it is a good one or bad one
until you make them, and alot of the things you do may seem good until you
do them, and alot of bad mistakes can really hurt and can't be repaired.
But you sound like Miss goody good shoes, you probbaly know everything you
do is gonna be bad, your actually the only perfect one in this world.
You know it's easy to get over life, and be happy. Well wise up bitch, you
sound real sympathetic, sounds like your heart is made of ice
Try carrying a baby full termed having the baby, watching it have to be on
life support for 14 days, then being the one to make the choice to pull
the plug, because you know the baby is brain dead and will never live. See
how easy that is, see if you can get over it and say oh well life goes on.
I'm glad that you can go on, and hold your head high no matter what
happens to you, and say the hell with the bad. I'm glad it's easy for you,
but why the fuck do you think that you have the right to come into a
message room, that helps some of us calm down to write our feelings, and
tell us we're full of shit and we need to get off our asses. So what,
we're on the computer, but so are you, how else did you find this page.
Life isn't that easy, you bitch, we take medicine, we see doctors. we talk
to family and friends, we do what we should, and it is still hard.
You better watch what you say, because something might happen in your
life, and it may not be so easy for you, and you might feel the same way
we do. Because not all of us felt this way all of our lifes, and life
isn't simple or easy for anyone, but you don't know what goes on in other
peoples heads, and you will never understand life until you open up your
heart and eyes, and realize, that some peoples problems aren't that simple
or easy.
I do things, I get out, I write down my problems, I go places with
friends, I do stuff all the time, but nothings last and you have no right
to put me down.
I'm sure everyone that read your posting felt like you really sympathised
with them, you really encouraged them, and made them feel their life is
worth living. I bet you brightened their day, you selfish bitch.
sounds like u desurved to loose the baby go F**k yourself, who are u to
come here and dictate to us, the guy again and get another one, becky is a
good person and no one gets treated like that in here ur loose is no
reason to flip, get a life and feeling if u have this way of talking wih
kids u don't seserve to have them now stop being a bitch and f off
matt
- defender of becky
im so fucking sick of life. i cant stand this shit no more. everything i
ever do is wrong, and everything i try to do is never the right way to do
it. i try to help out someone and the tell me to go to hell. well damn
maybe i should just give up. screw life right? what the hell is there to
live for in this damn "wonderful" world. today, i tried to help my friend
realize that saying things that weren't true hurt other people. so i told
the people that it involved. and well needless to say, i was told to go to
hell all fuckin day. and i asked them so if i dont show up tomorrow, you
wouldn't care? and they said i wouldn't have ever cared...in fact, i ask
for it everyday...for you not to show up. so one of these days..im not
gonna show up...and im gonna put in my suicide note telling the people
that i'm sorry that it took me so long to finally leave.
Matt, defending Becky, must be your wife or girlfriend, or something, I
didn't lose no baby, my friend did, why don't you read Becky's posting
again, you'll see, she was just criticizing the people in here. She wasn't
trying to be helpful, And to tell me I don't need any kids, or deserve to
lose them, I read your postings, you talked no better than I did in here,
infact, you said bad stuff about God, you devil worshiper, who deserves to
have kids? guess your no better than I am!
I also don't understand your comment,the guy again, get another one. that
made no sence, what the hell? Becky has the right to dictate us? just
because we're not as stable as her, I don't think so, where did you read
on her posting to see that she is a good person, in kind words, she was
trying to tell us we're fucking stupid for filling the way we do, and to
tell us to get off our asses, maybe she thinks we're just lazy.
Maybe using waahhh or woe is me, is a way of helping, right? that is
ridiculing.
And her comment about people that made the wrong choices, I've got no use
for you, buck up. yeah your life sucks. Stop being stupid, Okay, they made
wrong choices, maybe these choices really messed up those peoples heads,
maybe they really disturbed them, and maybe thei so depressed over these
choices, you can't go back and change time. But you can't get over things
that easy, especially if their really depressed and bothered over it. My
problems aren't because of bad choices, some are, but most I had no
control over.
Matt, no one deserves to lose their kids, unless they're really bad
parents, or are awful people.
You put down all the God loving people, do you deserve to have kids? I
think so, as long as your not a bad person.
Hey all you susicidal and depressed people, did Becky's posting encourage
you to live? Was her posting inspirational? Did it seem as if she was
actually trying to help? Or do you feel the same as I do? She was just
putting us down.
I really love one of her last lines, do something proactive instead of
"Misery Loves Company" hanging-out-in-chat-rooms crap, good advice, right
folks? Makes me energetic, gives me motivation, hey, I feel like dancing.
Anyone want to dance with me?
Good thing we have people that want to listen and give us good advice, or
we might have already killed ourselves.
By the way, feeling like killing yourself, doesn't mean you can do it
easy, even though you feel like your life is worthless, and that you want
to end it, some people still have the fear of death. That is why, even
though we feel like doing it, we can't do it quick. Some even really want
help, so they hold on as long as they can, seeking the help they need.
But I'm sorry, after reading Becky's posting, it made me angry, the first
line she wrote got to me right away.
Okay, I spent way to much time reading this post, here's my armchair
shrink analysis.
First off, who asked anyone to be our shrink, I think we all are looking
for a shoulder or a ear, not a shrink. And second, if she didn't want to
read them, who made here? We want someone friend to listen, not treat us
like a mutant.
I'm sorry, if my posting are pissing everyone off, but I don't feel like
Becky was trying to be friendly or helpful, it was if she thinks we're
just doing this to make people feel sorry for us, or to get attention.
Me- defender of the real world
because not everyone is the same, and some can't cope as well as the
others.
This is pretty interesting. I agree with the author.
dna,
the auther said that the woman who arranged her own murder was morbidly
interesting, via, "suicide chatroom".
I don't see anyone in here wanting to arrange their own murder, or anyone
wanting to arrange their own murder and cannibilizing.
we're just people searching for solutions and the strength to hold on to
life.
Well there was one lady wanting to borrow someones garage, and maybe find
someone to hold them while she died.
Maybe this is why Christopher put this room up, maybe he was actually
trying to see if he could find people like that, maybe it turns him on.
Well, I want to think everyone for putting up with my post, and for
listening, wanting to help or to put me down, if you read my postings,
then you still listened.
I'm not going to be coming in herer anymore, no, I'm not committing
suicide, I just decided to do my best at living.
I've been doing alot of reading and researching on suicide, how the people
feel when they have depression, how suicide reflects your loved ones, what
happens if suicide fails... everything you should know.
I know, I have no control over my life, the bad or the good, I still get
depressed, and I still feel like ending my life, but this message board is
not my answer. I need to get my life in order, it's not going to be easy
for me, I'm scared of failing, but as the saying goes, " failing is not an
option", I need to find a way to make things better, even the littlest
accomplishments will do.
Christopher, I want to thank you for creating this page, no matter what
your intensions were, but, after reading some of these postings, I
realized I need to live.
I found a poem on here that I would like to share with everyone.
"Before You Kill Yourself" by Mirigrace Lodice
Your Mind's made up
You can't take it anymore,
Life's impossible
And suicide's the answer to Heavens Door!
Before you kill yourself
Ask the 15 year old,
Who tried to electrocute himself,
He lived, but now...
He must carry on
with both of his arms gone!
What about jumping?
Come see Jack, who survived his leap
from a 10 story building
He lived, but now...
He'll always need care,
He's a vegetable - mind like a cabbage,
He lives in fog,
With ireversible brain damage.
But worst of all...
He knows he used to be normal!!
Come see the All American Football Player
Who thought he was cool and bought a gun
And shot himself in the head at 21.
He thought it be easy
And without any harm,
He lived, but now...
He can't feel his legs and has a useless arm!
He lost his dream, his vision and his hearing on one side
But he lived
Through his atempt at suicide!
Then there was this prom queen
who was left comatose
with extensive brain damage
From her grug overdose.
She mixed some alcohol with some pills
It took awhile... but it definetly kills.
First, you're in excruciating pain
Your eyes roll back & your skin turns yellow
It's not a pretty sight and it's a hell of a way to go!
Who will cut the rope from where you hang down?
Who will identify your body after you've drowned?
Who will scrape your brains from the ceiling?
Or clean the blood off the carpet?
A cleaning crew will refuse the job
But somebody got to do it!
Oh, and that carefully worded suicide note is no help
For the unending pain that is forever felt!
Who will it be? Your sister? Your mother?
Your father? Your brother?
Those who love you will never recover!
They'll have to live with regret and the quilt
Along with all those unanswered questions.
They love you... but deep down inside they hate you
For thinking only about yourself and
your lifes ending decision!
There are people who can help you
Before you decide to put your life to an end.
Call a hotline... or call a doctor
Call the hospital... or call a friend.
Call a minister... or call a priest
Call a family member... or call the police!!
They will help you
And they'll give you hope
When your will is down
And you can no longer cope!
You say you don't want to be stopped
Are you definetly sure
You want to commit suicide?
Because if you fail
You're gonna wish that you were left to die!
So... Before you kill yourself...
Remember...
Suicide is not always the answer,
NOr is it always successful
Consider your actions
Because living with the results are dreadful !!!!
This room is part of a larger site, www.lurid.org.
Lurid is a blog, a
running commentary on social and personal issues. This message string
sprang into life when google ranked lurid.org as the top hit for the
search term "suicide chat". This post gets lots and lots of hits from
different search engines for searches about suicide and suicide chat
rooms. I posted the initial post because I found people arranging suicides
via chat rooms to be disturbing. I'm glad that some of you have come
together to form a sort of semi-cohesive community, but that was not my
initial intention.
No, I don't "get off" on people meeting for suicide pacts. I remove the
live chat room last week for that very reason. I feared it might be used
as a vehicle for people to do damage rather than good.
I've had a close friend and co-worker commit suicide, so I understand
how horrible it is. I would never knowingly provide resources for people
to arrange suicides.
As for the recent activity: please be civil. I think we can all make
our points without resorting to personal attacks and insults. Profanity is
just a crutch for the inarticulate, anyway.
Be well.
--Christopher
lurid.org admin
It sounds to me like Debbie got my point. Hanging out on the computer
commiserating with other depressed people is NOT going to change your
life. You have to be proactive and make a commitment to life. Deal with
the cards life dealt you. See a therapist, get on some pills, read some
self-help books, change your self-destructive patterns, whatever applies
to your particular situation.
The only person who's mad here is the one
who fit into my category of people who screw up their own lives and then
want to whine about it. The truth hurts, doesn't it? Obviously, or you
wouldn't have attacked the messenger (me, who you know nothing about), you
would have addressed the message.
No duh that people make decisions that might seem right at the time and
then turn out wrong. Um, that's part of being human, isn't it? We're not
omniscient, we aren't perfect, we screw up. EVERYBODY does that. But the
REST of us DEAL with it, make the most of it, learn from it, and move on.
We don't sit around whining about offing ourselves, looking for pity or
company or whatever in a suicide chat room.
And who was it that said she moved on from one loser man to another? Or
couldn't leave the loser man she was with? Hello? Whose problem is that,
honey? Ya don't like your life? CHANGE IT. And no, it's not gonna be easy,
and you might have to make some sacrifices in your creature comforts in
the short-term, but there are agencies set up to help people in
need...churches, charities, community services. But nobody can help you
until you decide to help yourself.
Angry? GOOD. GET ANGRY. And instead of sending your misdirected anger
my way, take a good assessment of your life and realize that what you're
really angry with is yourself. AND ACT ON IT. Anger's a helluva lot more
productive an emotion than this whiny crybaby shit. Anger comes with
adrenaline and motivation; try channeling that into something positive
instead of resorting to fourth-grade-level retorts to a person who posted
a message on a stupid computer.
You REALLY wanna show me??? PROVE to me you're not a crybaby wimp by
CHANGING YOUR LIFE. Then come back here and tell me what you've done TODAY
to improve your situation. THAT would impress me.
y is it the drugs i took all those years ago made me the way i am today, i
used to smoke pot ALOT and it started to make me hear and see things when
i hadn't been smoking it in ages, i developed skitzaphiena (sorry i'm not
to good at english nemore) smoking all that pot, coke, speed, E, they all
messed me up, so y is it i can't live without them even tho they made me
the way i am, i can't live without pot i know that sounds wierd but t's
true, it's the only thing that balences me out and gives me timw to chill
out and think about my life, i can't get a job cos i have skitz and manic
depression so i am living on mental benifit which is only £250 amonth and
that has to feed and keep clothes on my body, i get a flat which is the
only upside cos i can't aford nething on my own and all the bills are
inclusive execpt phone bill but i don't have a phone cos without friends
it seems pretty pointless, i have a mobile and a few people txt me a few
times a month, too see if i'm still alive i guess i live with my GF we are
both very private people apart from when we go out to places for dinner or
fun, my lifes simple i eat, keep alive, pleasure alice and sleep,work
doesn't come into it not for a few years i guess neway, i have been
suicidal since i was about 8 or so, used to throw myself down the stairs
all day hoping that time would be the last, never worked just hurt, the
wierd thing is tho i havn't broken a bone yet in my life even tho i wanna
know wot it feels like, guess i an't had a bad enough acident yet, even
tho i have been hit by cars, bikes, beeten up in kickboxing fights AND i
do motocross and still no broken bones, the motocross helps so if ne of u
guys wanna find somin fun and for EVERYONE it really gives u aa high going
fast flying over dirt racing round corners and best of all if ur good
enough winning money at the end of the race, if u wanna find out more
contact me if u like and i can help u sort it out if u like, there are
places that do day corses for like £170 and u get the bike for the day and
all the protection clothing.
all i can say is dont let life get u down theremay be a god they may not
be, wot ever the outcome u are ur own god at the end of the day think
about it wot does god have that u don't ? control over life, u have that
over ur oen, just think how special u are u are one of a kind.
matt
JESUS BLESSED ME WITH A HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THIS A GOOD THING SO NEXT TIME I COME BACK THERE WILL BE A CHAT
ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
is this a chat room i need to chat it is fun..i love god and thank him for
all he has done i love god he is a mercy,forgiving,loving,god....
Becky,
you didn't read on any of my postings saying I moved from one bad man to
another, and I'm not the way I am from bad choices. Okay, I got angry, but
not because you hit me right, because you are way wrong, my problems came
from things that I couldn't control, not from any choices I made.
Maybe I was wrong for what I said about you, but it was because when I
read your postings, I see you putting us down, not really wanting to help.
And I never once said that I was with a loser man,
hell, I don't even remember saying that i was with anyone. All though I do
have an understanding wife, who knows my problems, she knows they weren't
my fault and was nothing I could control, becasue I had no choice over
them.
I do get out and do things, I come in here to escape , because when I get
in the moods I take, I don't want to be out in the real world, that
doesn't help. I also feel no need to prove anything to you, I also feel no
need to impress you.
I am not angry with myself, so if you want to be a shrink, you better go
to collage and learn more about depression and suicide, because right now,
your just practicing being a quack.
I will show you I can be a real man, I want to apollogize for the things I
said about you, you didn't desrve that, I also want to tell you how sorry
I am, to hear that you had a miscarriage, I'm glad that you was able,
after which was probably a long recovery, was able to get your life in
order, at least the best you can and have.
But for some of us, it isn't that easy, we're not as strong as you, I do
get out and do other things besides sitting on a computer, but I come here
to escape, because I found that people who go through or feel the same
way, seem to listen more.
And typing in here also releases some stress and fustration.
We need help and encouragement, not criticism or tough love as you stated
it, tough love is what we need from our families not by a complete
stranger.
Hey Matt, defender of Becky, you know how you put me down for talking
about Becky, because you are her defender.
Well, you should type in www.lurid.org, scroll down to suicide chat, and
see how she reacted and replied to AdoringAngels posting, just click on
comments, and you'll see she did the same as I.
Before you decide to defend someone, you should look for their real side
first.
I'm still popping in here to read your posts
I started posting on this site for my own peronal reasons
Not that anything i've posted here makes any change to my life.
Congrats to that guy or girl, god is good, i'm glad he blessed you with a
horse
I wish he'd bless me with a few important things in my life, but it
allways gets worse.
When you're deep down and blue, your prayers seem useless, unanswered.
I've lost faith in god often, i still pray sometimes, maybe somebody will
hear me and help me.
Most of you seem like nive folk, i tryed on a number of ocasions to meet
you.
I even built a site for people on these forums,
You can walk around, visit other worlds, meet other people
With your own characters, use the chat while walking around in 3d.
Speak to everybody with text to speach software.
All good fun!
I'm still working on other ideas for this site, but the main part is
working fine,
Just search for a copy of Blaxxun Contact, it's a 3d browser, install it
and visit
http://gsworld.allreal.net/
I hope christopher doesnt mind me adding this link
I've dont alot of work to keep the adds off this site.
It wont change your life but it's better than any chatroom you'll ever
experience.
I've actually met one or two people that said they came in through that
link ^
They never thought you could do this stuff inline hahaha
It's around years, but it's getting more realistic, advanced.
Hope to meet you in there, my 3D nick is Sounds
Is everybody dead or something?
Havent seen a ost on here for a while
I have read all the e-mails, before reading them i was fine (happy). i am
not suiciddle i have no idea what you guys are going through but after i
finished reading ur emails I became really sad. i had been depressed
before but i never thought about killing myself. When u kill yourself u go
to hell if you think ur suffering and u want it to stop killing ur self
its not the way to go. The bible says that hell its the worse place to be,
there you'll suffer eternally who says this not me --God, and trust me He
never lies. Some of u think no one cares for u, God cares for you. If am
writing this email is not because i decided to do so is because God wanted
to talk to u i am just an instrument He used. Take a look around you see
everything u own now think about the little kids from worldvision the ones
dying from starvation from different illnesses, now thank God for
everything He has given u. If only u knew how much He loves u. Do you know
He is right next to u right now? Do u know He cries with u when ur sad and
u cry. I encourage u guys to read the bible there u will find the answer
to ur suffering. Pray to God. He knows how u feel but He is waiting for u
to trust Him. He loves u guys if u guys are alive is because He cares. i
don't know u guys but I care for you. I love you, why? because in God's
eyes we are all brothers and sisters. I'll be praying for all of u. live
is precious find something you love and focus your attention on it. For
example i love hummingbirds i would'n like to die without seeing a newborn
hummingbirth imagine how small how full of life and beautiful. Wouldn't u
guys love to go out on a sunny day to look at the flowers the red roses or
maybe go to a lake look at the blue water, the colorful fishes the
waterfalls and all the green surroundings wow!!! that makes me want to
live and be positive and of course Thank God for everything!!!!!!!. i love
Him so much and i have faith that if u guys trust Him and open your hearts
to Him He won't hesitate to answer your prayers u just have to TRUST HIM.
Be humble and honest when you talk to Him.
GOD IS LOVE AND HAPPINESS
"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose
mind is stayed on thee"... Is. 26;3
I have read all the e-mails, before reading them i was fine (happy). i am
not suiciddle i have no idea what you guys are going through but after i
finished reading ur emails I became really sad. i had been depressed
before but i never thought about killing myself. When u kill yourself u go
to hell if you think ur suffering and u want it to stop killing ur self
its not the way to go. The bible says that hell its the worse place to be,
there you'll suffer eternally who says this not me --God, and trust me He
never lies. Some of u think no one cares for u, God cares for you. If am
writing this email is not because i decided to do so is because God wanted
to talk to u i am just an instrument He used. Take a look around you see
everything u own now think about the little kids from worldvision the ones
dying from starvation from different illnesses, now thank God for
everything He has given u. If only u knew how much He loves u. Do you know
He is right next to u right now? Do u know He cries with u when ur sad and
u cry. I encourage u guys to read the bible there u will find the answer
to ur suffering. Pray to God. He knows how u feel but He is waiting for u
to trust Him. He loves u guys if u guys are alive is because He cares. i
don't know u guys but I care for you. I love you, why? because in God's
eyes we are all brothers and sisters. I'll be praying for all of u. live
is precious find something you love and focus your attention on it. For
example i love hummingbirds i would'n like to die without seeing a newborn
hummingbirth imagine how small how full of life and beautiful. Wouldn't u
guys love to go out on a sunny day to look at the flowers the red roses or
maybe go to a lake look at the blue water, the colorful fishes the
waterfalls and all the green surroundings wow!!! that makes me want to
live and be positive and of course Thank God for everything!!!!!!!. i love
Him so much and i have faith that if u guys trust Him and open your hearts
to Him He won't hesitate to answer your prayers u just have to TRUST HIM.
Be humble and honest when you talk to Him.
GOD IS LOVE AND HAPPINESS
"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose
mind is stayed on thee"... Is. 26;3
If you died today, do you know for sure that you are going to heaven when
you die?
Would you like to know for sure that you are going to heaven when you die?
Many people think that going to Heaven is something we have to earn by
being good, by being kind, by doing good things for others. We are
encouraged to pray and go to church. While these are very good things to
do, they will not earn you a place in Heaven. The Bible says that going to
Heaven is a free gift. Do you believe the Bible?
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through
Christ Jesus. (Romans 6:23)
For God so loved the world that he GAVE His only begotten Son, that
whoever believes on Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life. (John
3:16)
Heavenly Father, thank you for sending the free gift of your son,
Jesus, to die for us that we could live forever. Thank you for raising Him
from the dead that we might have new life in Him. Please forgive me for
all the things i have done wrong. Jesus, come into my life and change my
heart. Teach me to love as you love us. Thank you for the free gift of
Eternal Life. Amen.
If you finished this prayer and meant it in your heart, you have a home in
Heaven waiting for you.
www.freegift.net
now you could say that...in theory it could even be truthful...but comeing
from someone whose faith became submerged in alcohol...its a comfort
barrier. it supplies good/correct morals and a basis for self
satisfication...if thats even a word...a way of explaining the
unexplained...and because a few thousand generations of people before hand
had lots of things to be uncertain about like "hmm theirs a big ball of
yellow stuff in the sky...lets imagine that theirs some naked bloke with a
large beard and bigger chariot pulling it thus exploiting the slower
amongst us" Im more inclined to believe in a group of humans out smarting
another group of humans by useing uncertaintity to their gain than think
that everyone many years ago was still having problems spelling their
name.
now i am fully aware that this has nothing to do with anything but its
something to type before i return to flicking thru tv channels
besides....theirs nothing more frightening than a human being who
"believes" in something
hail apathy; the worlds one certainty
and im In Britain damn ur
eyes....so its not! 10pm or something its 3am aha! so just remember
I'm afraid to think about it right now,
But reading about it brings me much more closer to death.
At the moment i'm probably half way off this planet
But the thoughts about, lost friends, who decided to end it all
Passing through my mind doesnt make me feel to comfortable, knowing that i
don't know where they went, but they could be doomed to hell.
I'm sorry people, my brain wonders, i'm afraid right now.
I've had a hard day and even harder night, although i was there i stood
alone.
I discussed "me" with a friend at the end of our evening of entrtainment.
I felt that i stood out and now i know i was right.
My looks arent te problem, i'm jut tormented inside. and people will
notice.
The sad trouth is, i'm out on my own, sort yourself out or let the world
pass you by. how painful is that every day?
If it doesn't hurt, it burns
My worst nightmares every day
It's like i've seen into the distant future.
When you're at this stage, you can only pray for hope.
Been praying for a long time now.
A book, "The Battlfield of the Mind" might be of help about the topic of
suicide.
Also, Revelation 5:23 considers us as tripartite individuals;
that is, each of us has a Spirit, Soul, and Body.
The soul part of this tripartie is our mind (reasoning),
will(decisions), and emotions(feelings.
The state of this soul portion of us is involved with any thoughts of
suicide that one might have.
Thomas, I am at
ttpool2002@yahoo.com
Hello, how are you all? good I hope, thought I'd drop by and see how
everyone is doing. Me, I'm ok, still depressed, but I'm trying to find
happiness and peace of mind.
I don't know if things ever get better, but
I am trying, I try to get out and do alot more, I've been out searching
for a job, I'm trying everything possible to make my life better. Because
for once in my life I want to be happy.
I see that there hasn't been very many people in here writing, I hope you
all haven't committed suicide, I hope you all are doing better.
Well, maybe I'll drop by in here again.
I can't say much cause I am all out of words to say. At the end of the
day, it doesn't matter how you look, it's really how you feel and what you
think you feel. Sometimes it makes me so sad to see that others are just
as sad as me. Why are we dealt the cards we are dealt? Is it coz we can
handle it? If we all joined together we could circle the world again and
again, why is that? I am sick with grief, hate and misery. And I think, if
I leave it will make me feel better. I'll show them. But we're all trying
to leave aren't we? Unless someone or something comes and swoops down and
takes us in their arms. Some us don't even want that any more. I don't
care if I ever meet that person. I don't want to meet him, because I don't
want to turn out like them. I'd give anything for love yet love does not
come to anything. You have to be open and I am not. SO her I am. Here you
are.
were are the chat rooms 4 people that need to talk 2 someone right now?
if you are on this sight to talk to someone about suicide like i thought i
was. im sorry but there is no chat lines that i can find. were you can
chat and tell someone how you feel.if you need someone to talk to PLEASE
EMAIL ME i will talk to you i do understand how you feel.csmpdtsmt@msn.com
hey, look. i read this stuff two nights ago. i didnt even post. i tried
doing it for the first time after 9 years. and i failed miserably. i guess
we all need someone to talk to. my step dad is making me read some health
book, and...it just talks about how we should get help by pills or ECT.
Has anyone ever had that? WTF are these peoples problems......? I hate
this...I hate life....I always will...Its just a matter of time, right?
and dani, your right, the suiside rate is at the highest its been in over
60 years. People born in the 80's are more likely to try and commit
suiside than people born in the 70's or 60's. someone, can u please email
me and talk to me?
whats with all this gawd crap?
ok umm jose, your site needs some updating...email me pls
ok now im um kinda bothered...no ones in here and umm my step father of 15
years just tried to kiss me last night and was touching me. i really need
a friend right now
i just want to tell everyone in here that if they need any help with
anything or advice, maybe i can help you with the things that i've been
through in my life even though i'm only 15. i've been through being beat,
i've been through suicide, i've been through being in a mental institution
and i've somewhat learned about what can help people and what cant. some
of you may think im just a phyco and i need to understand life more. but
let me tell you guyz something, i understand the meaning of being
depressed. i know that most of the time, you just need someone to talk to.
so dont hesitate to email me and just ask me if i think i can help you,
write in the subject, I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE so that i know that its
someone who just needs someone to understand them, and help them through
this.
~maggz~
i'm sick of ppl saying take anti depressents and you'll be fine its a
bunch of crap. i'm on them and i'm still falling apart i dont know how
long i can keep going and all my psychologist does is make me play with
sand trays and toys.mi heads throbbing and my chest hurts. there's a great
weight on my chest and it makes it hard to breath. fuck everyone who
doesn't care stop just doing your jobs and either start caring or piss
off.
Hello all, it's me again, I seem to keep wondering in here, it still
relieves some of my stress.
To all the people that has been saying that coming on your computer isn't
an answer. Well, I heard on my radio the other day, that researches proved
that searching the web was a good way to relief stress and to help you
realize the difference between reality and immagination. They say the
computer helps you escape, no, maybe not spending your whole days and
nights being hypmotized by the computer will help, but coming on here to
escape does.
So, I see that i' not the only one that comes on here to relieve stress,
no, maybe it's not a cure, but occupies some of my time and takes me away
from my life problems,.
By the way, my doctors told me that my tiredness and my sluggish moods and
my depressed moods is caused by my thyroids, I have a thyroid disease.
They said I won't start feeling better until my medicine get into my
system, they said in about 4 weeks.
Who knows, maybe this will work.
God damn it, is there no where to go at 3 a.m.? Bitch, moan, bitch, moan.
I wish I had Instant Messenger, so that perhaps I could get some small
voice way out there to type responses to my laments.
I don't know, depression, anger, jealousy ... when you try to explain it,
of course it sounds like bullshit ... like you're trying to convince other
people that you have problems, but they're skeptical, thinking, "What's
the problem? You've got it made!" So then, eventually, you, like them,
start acting like you've got it made, knowing that no one wants to hear
about your problems, and pretty soon you indeed have learned how to
sleepwalk through life, and it's fucking easy, people really do leave you
alone, if that's all you ask them to do. But god damn it, that's a hard
pill to swallow, agreeing to just live a regular human life, without ever
uniting the world or morphing into something else, or somebody else, or
getting to fall in love in all its splendor every single day.
And so every chance you get, you try to tell people how it feels, and
maybe in the process you can get them to think you're a genius and then
you can rule the world! Ha ha ha!
Ruben, I wasn't really sure what message you were trying to get out, or if
you was wanting to talk about your problems. But it sort of made sense,
well in a way. I kind of got out of it, you try to be what people want you
to be, so your a puppet to life, and you just lock your problems in your
head.
Well, if you do that, someday your bound to explode, because you just
can't shove it to the back, you need to find help, and there are people
willing to listen.
Who cares if it sounds like your bitching and moaning, it's your life your
playing with, you have the right. If you don't get it out, then maybe your
life might not last very long.
Look, no one knows how long their going to live, you can't predict that,
but we don't need to be the ones to end it. Try to live the best you can,
our lives are precious, cherish it as long as you have it.
Lynn
This new world of communication really is the Tower of Babel . Even more
people not understanding eachother. Talk about being lonely in a crowd.
life is getting really hard for a lot of people that i know. i try to help
them as much as i can, but it never seems to be enough. some people say
that they want to talk to someone, and when people say that they will talk
with them, they think that they're just there to see how many fucked up
people there are in the world. i hate the fact that people believe it
because im a person who loves to help people. i have a fucked up life and
im not ashamed to say all the shit that i've done, or to tell about my
experiences. so if you ever need to get so steam off or if your pissed off
at some people and want to talk about it, hell email me. i'll listen and i
will reply i promise. just type I NEED TO TALK in the subject and i'll
know. thankz
Take care of yourselfs
~*~maggz~*~
I come in here to spill my propblems, so I wanted to do something
different for a change, I wanted to share my good happenings along with my
bad ones.
I might not be on so much now, because I work in the evenings, so that
will occupy some of my time.
Power to the people!!!!!
Jesus loves the little children
all the children of the world.
Red, yellow, black and white,
they are precious to his site.
Jesus loves the little children
of the world.
He even loves the brown ones!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ask and ye shall receive!!!!!!!!!!!
Angel
Congrats Debbie!! Im so happy for you. Occupying time, Ive come to notice
is the best way to let go of my stress. Im doing something that I have
always wanted this weekend. My boyfriend has asked me to spend the night
at his house this weekend. So Im getting away from my parents. Maggz,
thank you for just talking to me. I always need a friend to talk to. And
if anyone does need to talk, you can email me too. Im on here everyday,
and i check my email everyday. So thank you all for listening to me. I
always need that. And Rubin, I understand what you mean. I hate being
someone else's idea of what I should be. Thats not me, so I am doing what
I need to at my parents house and when I am out, I will do what I want. Im
getting my life straight now and I am doing what I can. I am slowly
becoming happy. Staying busy. Thank you everyone. HUGZ
~Nicky~
if anyone need to talk about this problem i can help you i have msn just
add me and i will talk to you if someone needs help i have experienced
this and i know many peole that have , i can help you, just message me or
email me and i will answer as soon as i can but let me tell you something
your not the only one, your not alone, your not differ for thinking about
it and also just think that if you kill your self think about what will
happen after you leave how much pain you will leave behind and cause! and
if you think you dont have anyone , then guess again because there is
always someone that care even if you think there is not so if you think
that there is no eason to live i will give you a reason to live for
atleast the one i live for!! that has heled more then 1 billion people!
Believing in God is different than loving God. Even the devil believes in
God. U have to act, U have to ask. I kno, Ive been were u r before. I was
brought up in a somewhat religious surrounding, and i always believed, but
it took my bein suicidal to come back to my faith and learn to love God.
Hello there, I am totally new to this webpage. I am from Northern Ireland
and have been researching suicide for a number of years. I have been
bereaved by suicide from an immediate family member and I also attempted
myself 7 years ago. I know what its like to be in that dark place where
you feel no escape. Its been a long journey, but I am doing great now. I
am in the process of developing a suicide awareness program for schools in
NI and was saddened to read some comments about those who feel no will to
live in here. I am very passionate about the well being of others, so if
anyone needs a chat or a little support, please email. Debbie, I have been
reading your comments, its seems you have come a long way recently.
Congratulations on your job and best wishes for your future! ;)
i want to be a vampire but i looked for vamps but i cant find no one if
there is anyone out the can help me plz call me at 507-[MODERATED] just
ask for justin
I removed the phone number in the previous post.
Please do not post
personal information here or anywhere else on the net. It's just not a
good idea.
is there any point in living..........why are all people just backstabbing
cunts?
how can you trust anyone, wots the point in going on? im depressed, n got
an obsesission with taking a razor blade to my arms n wrists n just
slashing away, is there any reason to stop me going any further :(
i had a kidney transplant in january of this year...now i have to pay for
my medications,which i cant do, so ill go back on dialysis...i cant get a
job, ive gained weight, im crying all the time
To the person with the kidney stransplant, I have never had that, but I do
understand the gaining weight. Last year I weighed 130- 135, now I weigh,
then I went to 200, now I'm down to 185. I have a thyroid disease, I have
hypothyroidism. It causes you to gain weight,, which is about impossible
to lose weight with this, I too have to be on medicine.
I just this sunday started a job, but before I couldn't afford my
medicine, either. But usually there are foundations, and people that will
help you get the medicine you need. Just try to hang in there, I know it
is hard.
Thank you Nicky and Emma, I appreciate your support, and everyone else's
in here.
I have had a good week, I have actually been happy, not depressed once,
sad sometimes, but not feeling like killing myself. It's the first time in
a long time. It feels good.
I hope everyone out there can feel this way, I know it is hard, I also
hope this last for me, if it doesn't, I hope it does for a while anyways.
I have to sleep, I worked 49 hours this week, I'm tired, I wish you all
happiness and peace.
i've had the worst 4 months of my life and i've literally lost everything
that had made me happy. i've lost the person i love, i've lost my self to
drugs taht i had at first used to stop the hurt i felt. i hate myself and
everything about my life. i pretty close to ending it all right now. i
cant go on this way anymore. the pain i feel is too much for anyone else
to comprehend. the burden i feel is finally weighing me down so much that
the only solution is my fathers handgun. fuck this life fuck everything.
im sorry to all the people who care but this had to be done... goodbye
forever ill see you evenually
Dont give up Rick. There is purpose which hasnt unfolded for you yet.
There is someone in your future, close to your heart, that desperately
needs your wisdom and experience to help them through the darkness. Dont
turn your back on them. I will watch over you for now. Be strong and fight
it as hard as you can. Respectfully your Guardian.
Hey guys i never really thought about this so seriously but sometimes i
have these impulses to throw my self in-front of a car, train, bus
whatever.
I cycle alot and some times want to drive in to them aswell. sometimes i
wanna jump off really big cliffs aswell. the only thing is that i get a
kick out of thinking this. does this mean that i am suicidal or just not
right in the head.
I'm currently watching a tv prog bout suicide on the net, thought i'd chek
out sites. My life feels pointless rite now. I know i dont wanna b here,
wanna die. Even tho ive cut myself & taken overdoses i know i havent the
bottle to actually kill myself i dont think. Wish i did.
Hi
have just finished watching that programme on channel 4 uk about suicide
on the net. Brought back a lot of memories. anyone want to chat? I'm here
for a little while.
I HAVE BEEN INTO THE DEPTHS OF WHAT I WOULD CALL A HELL. I KNOW WHAT
EVERYONE HERE FEELS, AND I UNDERSTAND THE PAIN IN WHICH YOU ALL
EXPERIENCE. IM ONLY 18 AND YOU WOULD THINK I WAS OLDER. I STILL HAVE THE
THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD ABOUT HOW TO COMMIT SUICIDE, BUT THEN I THINK WHY? I
HAVE SO MUCH TO GIVE TO LIFE, WHAT IT IS I DONT KNOW, BUT I KNOW THAT
GIVEN TIME I WILL SEE THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL, SOMEDAYS ITS
HARD, BUT WHY GIVE UP THE FIGHT OF LIFE? LIFE CAN BE DIFFICULT AND IT WILL
BE. AND AS HARD AS IT IS TO DO WE NEED TO PICK OURSELVES UP AND DUST OF
THE PAIN. THE PAIN WILL NEVER GO AWAY, BUT IT LIGHTENS UP. THINK ABOUT
THOSE THAT YOU LOVE WHO LOVE YOU IN RETURN, CAN WE BRING OURSELVES TO
DRIVE THE DAGGER THROUGH THEIR HEARTS BECAUSE WE WANT TO GIVE UP? NO, WE
NEED TO TAKE THE LIFE WE HAVE AND WRESTLE IT AND MOULD IT THE WAY WE WANT
TO, FORGET WHAT PEOPLE WANT YOU TO BE AND WHAT THEY TELL YOU, LIVE YOUR
LIFE AND LIVE IT WELL, ITS OVER IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE. SO WHY MAKE IT
SHORTER? DAVID
does any one know a web address where i can chat real time to other
suicidal people
englishbird do you know a chat room wheer i can talk to others inmy
situation
if someone is so pissed off that they want to die they have no sense off
value of themeselves and hate the way they feel why not try what i do i
keep on going just to see what happens and deny the part of me that would
love to go any satisfaction a bit schits admitedly but good fun dualing
with myself on a knife edge as time goes on the part of me that rubs the
nose of death in poo gets a buzz and becomes more possetive shit spelling
never mind.
It does get lighter, it doesn't feel like it when you're in that hole, and
I would never have believed anyone if they'd told me.
But it gets bearable, liveable. If you suffer from depression it never
'leaves' you. But it actually makes you a better person. you are able to
understand others the way you were never understood. There is light at the
end of the tunnel - if you believe nothing else believe that.
Hi sean - I don't I'm afraid, it's been a long time since I voiced these
thoughts. I used to use a website called opendiary.com - think it's now
freeopendiary.com it's not real time it just gives you a chance to write
things and find like minded soles. If you find one tonight, let me know,
would be happy to talk.
also watched programme on suicide im not suicde ,but ,if i ever was
tempted? i believe an alternitive would be.
borrow money.somehow from
bank,credit card, whatever,(have nointertion of repaying it) and fly to
India/Africa ,whatever and help others who are worse off thn me,and stop
feeling sorry for myself. look im 69 years old and been around and seen a
lot maybe you will find anew life a friendship helping others worse off
than you , come on you suicides get it together and find a new life you
got nothing to loose, and better than wasting your life
lets all get together now people stop feeling sorry for yourselves & help
others who really do have reason to end it all, no im not a religiuse
freek just trying to make sense
Tony s
Thanks englishbird for that, I have serched all over and not found one the
way they spoke on tv tonight thought would be easy to find.
Just my luck
where you in uk
i am in birmingham
Hi Tony
Understand your comments, but that's because I'm 'recovered'
afraid it's not that simple. Logic doesn't come into it when you're there.
Me too - just been on another one which is crap - some girl desperate to
talk and a load of people playing games. Even been on the Channel 4
website, they should put more help on there. I'm in surrey.
also watched programme on suicide im not suicde ,but ,if i ever was
tempted? i believe an alternitive would be.
borrow money.somehow from
bank,credit card, whatever,(have nointertion of repaying it) and fly to
India/Africa ,whatever and help others who are worse off thn me,and stop
feeling sorry for myself. look im 69 years old and been around and seen a
lot maybe you will find anew life a friendship helping others worse off
than you , come on you suicides get it together and find a new life you
got nothing to loose, and better than wasting your life
lets all get together now people stop feeling sorry for yourselves & help
others who really do have reason to end it all, no im not a religiuse
freek just trying to make sense
Tony s
No offence Tony, but i think you just said that ;o)
seems hopless English bird seems like these people dont want help,may be
they wanna be a celebrity?
me id opt for Africa
Hello everyone! I found this site by accident but ive sat here for ages
just reading all your posts, ive been feeling depressed for a while now
and although ive got a boyfriend i cant really talk to him coz he might
not understand, not even sure if i do but just typing this is making me
feel a bit better. I would specially like to say hello to debbie, ive read
all your posts and i really hope you are feeling ok, feel free to post me
any time, take care *charley*
English bird if ya find a site will you mail me the details as i have to
be off here in a min
Thank you
ah! well back to the grind going to watch a movie .we tried English girl,
good luck Tony S
P.s suicdes if your reading this come on get it
together we all got problems.
I've been to Africa, and I love the place, and without getting into a
whole different debate, many of their problems stem from the 'west'
getting involved. People trying to help without understanding what their
helping. That's not ment as a dig by the way.
Helping people who feel
suicidal doesn't have to be helpless, many of them don't want to kill
themselves, they just can't see a way out. That's not to say I or anyone
else can give them a way out, but just to let them know that I felt like
that and I did get out can help them see that light. It makes it more of a
reality.
Will do Tony but it's not looking hopeful tonight. Hope you feel better
hon, it's not hopeless, and there are some of us who understand - honest.
try freeopendiary.com, helped me loads once.
Here for tonight charley if
you want to talk.
Tony - take care and enjoy Africa, it's an amazing place, would
recommed tanzania or kenya if you want to help.
Will do Tony but it's not looking hopeful tonight. Hope you feel better
hon, it's not hopeless, and there are some of us who understand - honest.
try freeopendiary.com, helped me loads once.
Here for tonight charley if
you want to talk.
Tony - take care and enjoy Africa, it's an amazing place, would
recommed tanzania or kenya if you want to help.
Shit - meant ok Sean!!
and don't know why it's posted twice - take it
all back tony ;o)
I'm fed up with life...I've had it!! Dissapointed everyone. My life's
really fucked up..I hate going out seeing people, I'm frustrated with the
way I look after that bike accident 3 months ago, the scars make me look
like a freak. No surgery is gonna make it look any better and I'll never
get a job, go back to uni or whatever coz of it. I'm gonna end my misery.
It will be easy. I'm gonna give myself a month of pure indulgence in the
things i like and want to do. I'm gonna finance all this by taking out the
maximum student loans. I'll also buy 2000 lottery tickets for the hell of
it... I'll take a cocktail of coke and vodka then cut all the brake cables
on my bike and cycle off a cliff at my favorite spot. They'll be some
money for mum and my funeral expenses if I dont spend it all. My death is
gonna take place from a month today. I'm really fed with with everyone
ok...Nobody's gonna stop me...i'm useless to you lot and I hope the
bastard who ran me over and caused this shit to my face in July fucking
dies too.... I really do love those of you who listens to this and care
about me. Goodbye 4 eva.........
hi Rs
How about a frind for the last month?
mail me
I was a normal teenager untill every1 started 2 allways blamin stuff on me
life has become 1 of the most horrible fingz at the mo i have wondered wot
life would b like if it waz diffrent but thingz arent i just dont wanna b
here no more many ways of killin myself have made me think bout wantin 2
kill my self but itz easier said than done skool just makes we wanna slit
my wrists and die and my so called friends just fink im weird cuz i wanna
die but they dont no wot itz like 4 me they enjoy life to the full itz not
the same as wakin up every moringin wishin u were dead plz help i dont no
wot else i can do! sorry i dont really no wot 2 write cuz i just dont
wanna b here no more i dont wanna live wot can i do!
suicidal blue biscuite
emailme any time if ya wanna talk I may not
answer straight away as might be at work
but talk to me
well 2day is fuckin shit like normal soz im bein all bitchy again i dont
mean 2 i just feel suicidal at the mo life is just doin my head in im
allways doin things wrong and my parents r blamin them for the way i am
when i just feel like y am i here i no u dont really wanna no all this but
this is how im feelin at the mo and i dont feel as if i can tell ne of my
real friends cuz they will just fink im weird cuz i feel like i wanna die
been on suicide chat rooms and left messages on there waitin 4 ppl 2 help
me i dont fink im that bad yet but if life just carrys on like this i will
become real bad and will try and kill my self i mean i have tried it b4
but i couldnt do it cuz i knew all the poeple i would leave behind would
all blame them 4 my death so u cant really say i havent treid itz just
hard when it comes 2 doin it and i dunno wot 2 do bout it or how 2 sort it
all out!
My beliefs are kinda crazy to the average joe but some people may be able
to relate. I reccon i have been depressed for about 3 years. However I had
lost my GF and freinds and had a drug problem. If I did have a mrs I dont
think I would ever have become depressed as in my opinion thats all you
need in life. (I didnt know I was depressed till I saw a programme were
they pointed out you feel tired all the time and cant be bothered with
other people). The problem with modern society is that you cannot escpae
it doesnt matter what you do. When I was going to jump in a river once
what stopped me was my dog who was going to walk him home? What if he got
run over etc etc. I was kinda wasted and sat in a field for a while on my
own. I then release that if there was a god (I dont believe in any
organised religion) he would be pretty pissed of I a threw the gift of
life away. I then began to look at ducks & think how nice for the 1st time
ever. What im saying is appreciate the simple things in life as they are
often the best bits and if your running to catch the bus you miss these
things. Slow down a gear fuck society and whats "cool" and what magazines
brain wash you to think. Im sure the suicide rate in the Congo is nothing
compared to Japan As the people in the congo dont have time to think only
to survive. As the Japs are processed into a system like chickens at a
battery site. Doesnt this show us all that modern society at its self
reflection as a large part of the problem.
P.s im not suicidal just have a anger problem now so everyone tells me:)
im 16 female from kent
i have never been on this web page befor but i really wanted to check it
out. i have been reading what people have been writting and it really does
make u think.
i also watched that program last night.
i never knew so many people could feel the same way. i would like to be
able to chat to any1, i may be new at this but i would like to try and
help some1 :-) im a good listern get in contact if any1 wanna chat.
im 16 female from kent
i have never been on this web page befor but i really wanted to check it
out. i have been reading what people have been writting and it really does
make u think.
i also watched that program last night.
i never knew so many people could feel the same way. i would like to be
able to chat to any1, i may be new at this but i would like to try and
help some1 :-) im a good listern get in contact if any1 wanna chat.
Heya Haywe,
yea cheerz datz all i need rite now is just sum1 2 talk 2 and listen 2 wot
i gotta say cuz no1 else will listen 2 wot i got 2 say and if i even
mention death ppl just dont take me seriously ne more! yea i dunno if u
saw the story on Andy but datz exacually how i feel so yes thanx for the
advice and offer as a friend
Suicide and depression I think that every great person in the world has at
one time or another felt more than they should. These people who spent
their lives on the edge of the black moods and mind bluring anger at life
have always been the most important people in history of art, music and
writing.
Contemporary society makes depression and suicide into something it isnt.
Its not that some people dont get it and some people do. Every human
being suffers from life crippling depression, some cry some fold up and
throw the cards in some go on mad killing sprees, some try to change the
world and make it a better place. some people just ignore it by taking
drugs or keeping there mind occupied with work. I am yet to meet anyone
who has not been so low they want to die.
The problem I have is that I dont believe there is a cure not from drugs
anti depressants freak me out, they are not healthy. neither do i think
that a psychotherapist can really help.
Most of the time the best cure is change. and then time and find
something to love. but overall I think go crazy do what the hell you want
and just see what happens life has a funny way of sorting things out
, never feel guilty and do what you can for other people
and grab hold of your dreams or whatever it was you wanted when you were a
child hold it as tight as you can and never let go.
wow, how cheesy is this site, thats a whole load of melodramatic crap, u
all talk like u wanna kill yourself but none of you have the balls to go
through with it.
Does anybody know any actually suicidal chat rooms? I need other people
who feel like me to talk to instead of people who are just gonna say
''dont do it'' , If you know of any chat rooms please email me , or if you
know any good methods.
hi there
ive bn suicidal since i was 11 abuse from family and friends
and now im 19 and the last time i tried killin my self was wen i was 17
and ive now got bk to the stage where i want to killl myself..im down
depressed,,,,i cnt talk to know one about it not even my family.....ppl
say i need mental help i dnt its ppl like them who f**k me up.......i want
to help others too i want ppl to know there not alone so email me
topez_biatch@hotmail.com zo
Sum times i fink ppl on here dont take it seriously there are other people
in the world who feel the same and belive me we all have tried 2 kill our
self at sum time in our life but have not managed to actually die cuz ppl
who love us and i dont no why want 2 save us and sum times i wish they
wouldnt cuz all i wanna do is bleed 2 death or just b found hangin from a
pole with a broke neck this is my life itz constantly dark and dull and i
feel as if im surrouned by people who hate me and i cant brake free and
sumtimes ppl on here make a joke of us just cuz we wanna die but just
because they dont c life as we do y make a joke of our lives and paul this
is how ppl feel so no itz not a board of cheesy shit and melodramatic crap
Anyone want to talk on msn add me lisa_bennet_2000@hotmail.com
somone plz give me a good reson to live because right now my life is shit.
ive tried hangin myself but got seen and they let me down.
i hate life and wont to DIE some one HELP!!!!
if ne1 wantz 2 talk e-mail me
dereks_sweet_honey@yahoo.co.uk
or
blue_everton_babe@hotmail.com
Desperate , I need methods of suicide , email me please
If any one needs 2 talk or any help contact me at e.kohler@sut.gdst.net. I
know what you must be feeling I felt like that a few years ago, but if you
want to express your feelings. I'm ready 4 a chat. Talkin 2 a anonamys
person really helped me to overcome my depression. And Dan don't kill
urself , ill really miss u! and so will ur family and friends luv u all
loads! H.Pullman
Hi guys, Im new here aswell, Ive just read the board and I also seen the
program on the TV last night.... I didnt realise there were such places
like this on the net... I'm the same as u guys, Ive been depressed since I
was 18 years old, I'm now 22, Ive tried despretly 2 end it all many times,
but have been found and taken into hospital. It would be nice 2 find some1
who knows wha I am goin tho and have been thro in the past, some1 to talk
2, and not get laughted at when I say how I'm feeling.
I got to agree with Blue_Buscit.... Paul, not every1 is as happy and as
cheery as u seem 2 b mate.
Benji, I really liked the words u wrote in ur massage, but u should
realise its not always that easy 2 change when u feel so low and shitty
about ur self, 'specially when u've got no1 there 2 help u, no1 there 2
listen, when ur whole life is dome and gloom, when all u feel is
emptyness, when the worst dakrest thoughts or nightmares are there smack
bang in the front of ur head.... how easy is it 2 change all that?
If any1 wants 2 talk 2 me, pleze email me, Id like 2 talk 2 other peeps
that feel the same as my self and even help people....
If anyone wants to chat send me an email or add me to your messenger, It's
easier and better than posting messages on here i think
Dan do u wanna chat ?....
msn: xepiphany22@hotmail.com
Aim: XEpipany22
Yahoo: Blue_Daizy812000
I have been this way for as long as i can remember i hav atemptid to kill
myself 3 times and once i was dead well thats what thay told me thay brot
me back to life i hate them for doin that i hav always hadthese thoughts
whot would it hav been like with out me if i had of gone if i had of
killed myself if thay hadent of found me and helped me i neva wonted there
help. ppl always watchin me now makein shore i do nothink like that again
every 1 tellin me it is goin to be good things will get back to normal but
for me thay ant eva been normal........
The one thing that ment the world to me thay tuck her away thay killed her
y wasnt it me i ask myself over and over again...........
ppl say this can help and that can help and i always feel like turning
around and sayin to them you now what it feels like to be me nop there is
nothik that can help me nothink...............
there's probably somethin or someone out there that can help you , its
just finding it
I no u guys out there think i'm just being patrinizing but i really do
care and want 2 no how u r feelin I watched the program last night and it
showed me how bad some people could get I was depressed a few yrs. ago but
talkin 2 my family got me over it. Did any1 watch da program last nite on
channel 4? Does any1 no da name of da boy who created his own website be4
commitin suicide. Luv u all
hi ppl i just need some1 to talk 2 at the mo everythin is so fucked up.
every1 is always on my bk and i cant hack it anymore. i try and talk no1
listens i just wanna end my life.i no ppl on ere feel the same and
wonderin wot i can do.
some plz help me i just wanna die
my email is god_605@hotmail.com
The bloke who made a web site six hours before he died was 'Simon Kelly'
The bloke who made a web site six hours before he died was 'Simon Kelly'
umm...watched that programme last nite,"chatting to death".Was feeling
alrite b4 that!its made me down,really down!some of the things one lad
said,i can really relate too,like walking across the road and just wishing
you'd get run over-i do that quite alot,ever since my best mate was killed
nearly three yrs ago when we were 16. Does anyone know any suicide
chatrooms???
wsssup people.......well friends i should say,im very new here and to b
honest the only reason im on here is cos i saw a programme on tv last
night which kinda suprised me,didnt realise there was or even could b a
place to talk about this stuff,feels like coming home,
the program was intreasting i dont know how u guys feel but i could only
really relate to that guy with the glasses,...the one who cut himself,the
girl didnt seem .....i dunno..genuine?
the fact is this the world were living in is dying and sum of us know this
we cant explain it to anyone else who dont have these feelings so fuck'em!
is there anyone out there ...who wants to have a chat?im adding this
site to my adresses (untill now havent really seen the point of using the
net),i d like to get to know sum people here.
hey, just thought i'd come on here, i actually find it bizarre that people
out there feel like i feel. i can't wright much at the moment but i'll be
beack on later. Just try and see the bigger picture to everyone who is
depressed as i know wen ur really down people tend to go crazy, and then
regret whatever they did later, i'm talkin shit, but just don't do
anything daft, think of what you'll be leavin behind. Talk later. luv
Lynz. x x
Hi, I'll start by saying that iam not depressed but sometimes i feel
depressed ( if thats understandable). When i feel "down" i look around,
I mentaly note all the plus points in my life and all the negative
points.... never has the negative points come anywhere close to the number
of plus points i have and this works for me!....
No matter how bad you are feeling there is always someone in a worse
position than you!
ether9 if u want 2 talk u can either message me or email me my names are
listed above. or any1 else 4 that matter =)
every one just hurry up and do me all a favour and KILL your fucking selfs
Anyone want to talk to someone who's going through something thats
probably similar to them then jus send me an email or add me to your
messenger : x_goodbyekittie_X@hotmail.com
do u lot realise how selfish u all are? wantin to take your own life that
you are lucky has been given to you.
look at people with disabilities or
a defect of some sort who can't lead a normal life.u don't see them moanin
bout how they are depressed.i wish you lot would realise how selfish and
cowardly u all are wantin to take the easy option and take your own lives.
think how your family will feel, think of how u'll ruin their lives, think
how much grief they will go through, just b cuz u were selfish and took
away what they gave you, a chance at living lifel
Danny P.... Im not goin 2 speak 4 every1, but 4 most people with
depression and suicidals its a case of wanting help, wantin 2 talk 2 some1
who understands them and understands what their going through.
Have u been depressed? ever lived in that dark gloomy place where nothing
seems it will ever get better. obviously not by the way u chat.
i think i might be gay, help me all my friends hate me, my email is
gefield@hotmail.com please help me i dont know what to do!!!!
KILL ALL THE SUICIDAL PEOPLE. Or let them do it for us. Attention seeking
at its worst. At what are you going to do now sucicidal homfags? Kill
yourself?OOOH please dont say something to me like your on trisha like 'we
sucidal people deserve road insurace'.
So go get some friends, or some goats and dont write crap into your arm
like 'lost' or 'im gay' beause you loose badly.
(by the way saying ANYTHING in reply to this will mean your instant demise
into gayness and you will be thrown off a tall building into a pit of
starving gay goats.
And please kill your self after reading this. Just die and stop wasting me
time
love John the incidiously cool
n e 1 wana chat,add me to ur msn. \m/
I saw the documentary on Channel 4 last night and looked up suicide
websites on Google and this is the first that came up. I took an overdose
two years ago because I was really ill and my GP wouldn't do anything to
help me. Turned out I had a brain tumour the size of an orange. It wasn't
cancer, but I've had sixteen operations so far and I'm still not better.
Even so I wouldn't consider taking another overdose. For all you people
out there who are depressed, ask your GP about Sertraline. That's the
antidepressant I'm on and it really does work wonders. After eight weeks
of taking it I feel on top of the world and hardly depressed at all.
Remember - the only person who can really help you is yourself. Peace out.
God damn theres some n00b's about
Guys I know how you all feek I was abused and beaten by my father, I was
bullied at school and my best friend jumped in front of a train I still
have very very low days.
If ANY one wants to talk about anything mail me anytime i will answer
as soon as I can
Go on, just do it JUMP!!!!!!!
If any genuine people who actually need to talk about depression / being
suicidal need someone to talk to just mail me or add me to your msn
Hello!
I took an overdose a couple of years ago - i know why i did it and thats
coz i wanted some attention! I sort of understand how low people can get,
my friend threw herself off a multi-stori car park a few weeks ago! i do
think a lot of people should pull themselves together but a lot of you do
need help. Please feel free to contact me if you want to chat. I cant
promise that i will understand but i can promise that i will listen and be
there for u. Love always! Shel xxxx
Hi everyone
I know how you are feeling. I have been one of the ones left behind after
two of my close friend's committed suicide. It's not an act of selfishness
and as for that plank danny_5, he obviously doesn't understand the depths
of depression.
Since my friends have committed suicide, I have went through tears,
anger and frustration. Three years on, I still ask why? Why couldn't they
come to me? But that's one of the problems with depression and suicide,
people feel they are alone and cannot talk to anyone. Their confidence and
self-esteem are sooo low that they feel people will laugh at them, but in
reality we won't laugh. I can fully sympathize.
I just wanna let anyone know if they wanna chat, i'm a good listener!
Hi all,
If any one want to talk about ANYTHING feel free to message me
my m s n address is here4u@hotmail.com I will try to have it on as often
as i can I will tell you what i can give you my personal voice on (i was
sexually abused and beaten by my father bullied at school my best friend
commited suicide and my brother died from an illness)
I will not judge you no matter what you say.
I still get days my self when I am suisidal and feel so low i dont want to
get out of bed I just want to die.
Feel free to contact me by email or m s n anytime
Sean
x
I experienced being depressed 7 years ago. My friend was dying of cancer
and because they were in so much pain I wanted them to die quicker.
Because of this I felt really guilty so I was depressed badly for about a
year. I pulled myself out of it though and I would never have killed
myself especially not whilst on line! Did anyone see that program last
night?
HI ALL SORRY THERE WAS A MISTAKE IN LAST POST MY M S N ADDRESS IS
here4u55@hotmail.com sorry about the error
SEAN
If anyone wants to chat about how they're feeling or whatever , email me
or add me to your msn
x_goodbyekittie_x@hotmail.com
Hi,
wow how shit is the net...trying to find live chat rooms to chat
about are pathes to deaht! I duno if this place is any good but give it a
go as anyhting and everything.
Life sucks..has done for bit now. Work is really bad, home life is as
well. Every day it's a chroe to get up out of bed...let alone do anyhting.
When im out down the street on the bus on the motorbike im just think
what if...what if the bus never stops or the car and craches and all
survie but me...or if run out in front of that car...
I was gonan end it all on my 18th. The best thing that could of happend
to me. i was well pumped up to go for it. Was gonna do the normal 18th
thing go get very rattied...then slip away after chatting to all
there..saying bye as i moved to the next person. On leaving take a laod of
drugs. Didn't care what...justthe fact the mixture of narcoties wouldn't
hep if any body trtied to save me after my efforts.
Plane was i'd be really messed up with the amoutn of drink and then
drugs in me that any help for the paremdics would kinda turn back on them.
So after all this i was off to wlak out inftront of the traffic. i was
gonan do it in front of these boy racers in the city i was in. I was gonna
get hurt really bad or die if i was hit. Ether way in the end i would of
gotten what i wanted. I was 5 mins away from my path ether up wards or
downwards.
My best mate and ex grilfriend and work partner had follwoed me. She
got hold of me and tried to take me back. with some fighting she won...was
very drunk mind. She got some help and next thing i knew im awake in
hospital. i hope that i had been killed or that iwas dieing right now.
Frade not she had saved me.... stomach pumped the lot..
Got told to go see concling and stuff but it only fuled it all. Mates
didnt help..kida shocked and well why bother with em if there like that.
Fokes were horrifed but i was at them as they kinda didnt help towards
it.
Now im just binding my time....see my path and go for it. if it happens
as an accident then it saves me some effort. thought im not seeing a apth
at all and hevent for some time now. Debating what to do. Tell my new
girlfriend who would understand....or look around and see what way will
get me out form this terible place.
it's got to be fast, simple, painles and garentied.
Umm you now how all say go give the world poart of your self and every
body in it. the thought of a human bomb has come up but how and where.
Maybe go see theos in the east and do them a favor.
ermm well as ya can see time need to run out...sonner the better.... my
fdreams are empty as my conices seam to be. I want to be free. free of the
chores of life. I want to ever lokk for above or from down under at the
ones that i left behind.
if ya help then great..e-mail post back im on aol
cheers PJW
Hello everybody, this is my first chat room, a cheerful one i picked eh,
does anybody wanna fill me in how this all works
Hi all,
I have just had a chat with 2 people off her that lasted for 3 hours as
they were very sad and down tonight, I hope to talk to them again soon but
who knows? If any one wants a chat anytime my m s n is
here4u55@hotmail.com
come over for a chat about anything any time i am on I wont judge you.
sean
anyone wants to chat about anything mail me or add me to your msn
x_goodbyekittie_x@hotail.com
looks like i will be around a lot today on p c so if amy one needs to chat
or wants to chat my m s n is here4u55@hotmail.com
come on over and caht
i wont judge you ever!
sean
Just got round to setting up my msn.
pjalchemsit@aol.com
^ thats my name on there right now but it will change soon as i get an
e-mail off em. heres hoping Just chatt when ya like...about anyhting.
i woz just wondering does anyone know the quickest and most effective way
to kill myself?if anyone knows of a definite way please post it on this
site and i'll b bk.ive tried killing myself b4 but obviously ive neva been
successfull,ive cum close but den sumting alwayz gets in da way.thanks
Rocket Cycles Pro Trials Rider
^ sorry msn is fucking uless a sis my
life all the time. the above is now my new name name on there.
if you sad gets really wanted to kill yourself then you want just go and
just off a cliff or really tall building but your not its called attention
seaking or professionally known as personality disorder ad me on to msn if
you want to chat about killing your self or methods ok thanks
scive@o2.co.uk ad me on to msn
I cut my arms up at school today! They are in a right fuckin mess and I
dont want anybody to know, family or friends I mean. I feel like I hate my
life at times?
Talk to me: Lifesucks2000@ntlworld.com (It works with MSN Messenger so Add
me and talk to me)
80 paracetamols should do it!why dont u all try it?xxx x x x x x x x
Anyone want to talk on msn add me lisa_bennet_2000@hotmail.com
why the fuck you all wanna die ?
if you reaaly want to die, then make some kind of mark in history while
doing it, like killing yourself in front of some kind of celebrity
I did have one really good way of going today. Think it kind a shocked one
person. It would of let all on the motorway see me...given who ever i'd
hit and they hit me part of me.
Im on msn right now if ya want to chat
about stuff...dont care what
pjalchemist@aol.com is what ya wana get me on.
That is so crap, and i agree with many of the comments, plush take up shot
chess, with real shots at any good store near you! :OP
hey peeps! i feel u and i have quiet alot in common u are my only friends
now like u i want to be dead and am pissed off that i have to put up with
every-1 elses shit what about mine i cut my arms hoping the pain might die
down and go away it never does it makes me mad and upset. i have a bf the
best thing in my life the 1 thing keeping me going we split up quite abit
we love each other too much 1 time he said that was it for gd and i put a
knife to my neck my friend phil got drunk and put a knife to my neck even
thou i was scared i loved it the thought maybe it might all end now.
i love you all but i don't know what to do
love sarah
xxxxxxxxxxxx
I kinda hate this purple prose s***, you can't recover from depression all
happy dappy and swallow a few happy pills. People are the way they are and
feel the way they do, and they shouldn't be judged on that and just need
to spend every day concentrating on the good.
I kinda hate this purple prose s***, you can't recover from depression all
happy dappy and swallow a few happy pills. People are the way they are and
feel the way they do, and they shouldn't be judged on that and just need
to spend every day concentrating on the good.
I have not read all the postings on this site, as this is the first time
I've visited it. Rick I hope you are still around as I would like to say
that there is a way out of the black bottomless pit, I know cause I been
there a come through the other side. It has taken a long time but never
the less here I am. I still have bad days but I have to take those days
miunte by minute.
Nicky I read some of your postings too, I understand how you feel as some
really horrid things happened to me from the age of 6 through til about 4
yrs ago. I can't tell you all my shit as it would probably bore everyone
to death, but lets say it couldn't get any worse I don't think.
When you feel really low you really do have to take a minute at a time,
don't look to far into the future as it becomes daunting.
I thought this would be a place that people who needed to talk to someone
NOW would be. Is there a site like this.
If anyone has any interesting methods , or wants to chat email me or add
me to your messenger ... x_goodbyekittie_X@hotmail.com
i dnt no wot to do. i need to no a website that can help me handle this
feeling can ne 1 help plz!!?
methods .. ANYONE ?? mail me
why do i think about killing my self all the time?
why do i always think about killing myself? anyone want to chat email me.
thanks
***SORRY TO ALL WHO TRIED TO CONTACT ME THROUGH M S N TONIGHT I WAS ONBUSY
MOST OF NIGHT WITH AN AUTOMATED MESSAGE. SOME ONE SENT ME A MESSAGE THEY
HAD TOOK A LOT OF PILLS AND THEY NEEDED 100% ATTENTION
HOP EYA ALL
UNDERSTAND AND I WOUL DO SAME FOR ANY ONE IN THAT SITUATION
SEAN
this is the first time ive been on here an ive read wot ya all say, ive
been there 2 but trust me it does get beta it isnt easy but possible
.....neva giv up xxxx
Does it gett better? I can't say as im just kinda finding that out. They
say time heals woundens..does it...ermm no. Not the woundes that we all
hold and have.
Oh aint theresoem place in sweeden that will kill you? You pay em and
they kill you?
just had my first lesson in skool the teacher was havin ago at me 4 not
bein in all last week the fact is who cares bout skool the reason i aint
been in is life it takes all reason 4 livin away from u so yea i may as
well drop out while i can they all say im noy up 2 doin the course and
shouldnt b here well there rite i shouldnt b here wotz the point ne more i
have lost the will 2 live the head wantz 2 c me bout sum fing probally 2
say i dont fink u should b here ne more and go find sum where else 2 go
well u no wot shez rite i fink i will go find sum where else 2 go and that
place is dark and i can hide where no1 can find me we will do what we want
and not get told wot 2 do i enjoy doin nuffin the fact is itz just skool
that makes me feel like this i cant wait 2 get out of this dump itz only
like 3 weeks till crimbo which should b gd cuz afta that no more skool im
neva ganna go in again but then i wount find a job cuz wotz da point i may
as well go and b a slave on a human waste site may then my sunshine would
sine through i mean i have a laugh with my m8z so life aint dat bad itz
just da work side of fingz at skool dat makes me wanna curl up and die i
just fink teachers would b so much more happier with out me around
um yea so do most ppl on this site fink dat as well so ure not the only 1
luv
BURN BURN
the truth, the lies, the news
BURN BURN
the life that you cant choose
BURN BURN
the hate that gets you through
BURN BURN
for us, for them, for you
what is it that makes us feel this way? why do the surroundings of the
happy people make me wanna cry? is it cos i lack somthing or is it just
cos i dont see the beautiful things?
I have survived child hood sexual abuse, physical abuse, rape, mental
abuse, & a very large over dose, 12yrs of depression & that's just the
start. Some of you who say you are suicidal ought to try reading A Boy
Called It, The Lost Boy & A Man Named Dave, Now He really did have a good
reason to be suicidal. If he can get through being burnt by his mother
having to eat dog shit, not eat for weeks on end, & lots of really bad
stuff, then there is always hope.
I can say I know how bad some of you feel, cause I've been there, I spent
weeks in different hospital on suicide watch. Then in another hospital &
another. I saw shinks, nurses, Dr's. At the time I didn't care what I did,
or the effect it would have on others. My sister stood watch over me at
the hospital when I OD, she watched as the colour ran out of my face & I
turned blue. It was not known if I would survive as they couldn't pump my
stomach. I came through it though. I'm here to tell people how bad things
can get, but you can get over it. Most people who talk about killing
themselves don't actual do it. Alot of you say how can I really do it, if
you really wanted to you would know. Jumping from buildings is a pretty
sure way, like trains are, but in reality what most of you are saying is
help, I really need someone who believes in me & is prepared to listen.
You don't really want to die, cause lets face it you're along time dead.
Life is not a rehearsal & you can't get the time back that has gone. I
know how horrible it feels to not know what has happened cause of
recovering from an OD, I have lost weeks out of my life, being attached to
machines, not being allowed of a ward because you might try again. I have
had people following me everywhere, checking on me every 10 minutes. Trust
me it's not nice. Now i can't get life insurance, driving licences aren't
as easy to get if you've made a suicide attempt.
I never thought about anything like this when I OD, cause I really did
want to succeed, but now I'm glad I did survive, but I'm still paying the
price for what I did. So please think carefully if you really do want to
die, or if it's help from someone that you really want. Life does seem to
deal alot of shit out but seriously nothing is worth dying for.
I'm sorry if anything I have said seems harsh but it fact. As long as you
have someone to support you & help you, you can pull through this.
Sometimes thing get blown out of proportion when you are down, but if you
talk to someone you can feel better, as long as all they do is listen &
hear what your saying, rather than them giving you their opinion without
them listening or hearing you.
The bottomless pit that you think you're in at the moment isn't bottomless
at all, eventually you will hit the bottom & then the only way to go is
up. You might be at the bottom for a while like I was, but you have to
want to get out, cause nobody can do it for you. So I hope that what I
have said may actually bring some hope to someone, somewhere, I have a
family of my own now & a husband who loves me to bits & I wouldn't want
anyone to miss out on the same sort of life for themselves. I have had 2
failed marriages & a shit life up until 2001, that's 32 yrs of shit, & I
regret trying to kill myself now. All that I've been through has made me a
stronger person today. I love my life now because that's what I've made of
it, but if you had said to me that this is what your future holds I'd have
called you a liar, but I wouldn't have all this if I had died 6yrs ago
when I OD.
IF YOU WANT TO KILL YOURSELF DO IT BECAUSE EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT MAKES
YOU ALL LOOSE AT EVERYTHING. WHY DONT YOU JUST CHILL OUT YOU FREAKS!
ITS ALWAYS 'IWANT TO DIE BECAAUSE THEN PEOPLE MIGHT LISTEN TO ME' OR 'IF I
SAY IM GOING TO DIE THAT GIRL I FANCIE MIGHT ASK ME OUT IN 5-10 DAYS'.
YOU ALL ARE SAD SO JUMP, JUMP NOW.
love john the if i use a big word it
might make me sound cool cool
FEELING SUICIDAL? WANT TO END ONLY YOUR SUFFERING THAT YOU MADE YOURSELF
BUT DIDNT NOTICE? THEN DONT FRET. GO OUT WITH A BAND AND GET YOURSELF INTO
THE NEWSPAPERS BY TAKING OUT A FEW GANG MEMEBERS THEN GOING TO THE NEAREST
COP AND RAPING HIM AFTER WHICH YOU HIDE IN A SMALL HISPANIC HOUSEHOLD
WHILST SWAT GUYS RUN IN A SHOOT YOU AFTER RAPING YOUR MOTHER IN FRONT OF
YOU BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU WANTED TO ANYWAY.
love john the i know i used
rape twice but thats why most of you are here arnt you. for low budget
porn cool
HI , ITS ME AGAIN,
iM ACTUALLLY REAALY REALLY REALLY NOT DEPRESSED. IM EUPHORICAL BECAUSE I
AM HAPPY. I ALSO CANT BELIVE YOU LOOSERS BECAUSE VAMPIRES ARE MYTHICAL
CREATURES, KILLING YOURSELF MEANS YOU DIE AND THERE IS NO RELIGION AND
BEING SUICIDAL ALSO MEANS HAVING NO CONFIDENCE SO YOU WONT GET ANGRY BY
ALL THIS STUFF IM SENDING YOU.
love john the now ive said you wont say
anything back you will so try it cool
ALL YOU KIDS ARE .........there is no word to describe what you are, you
just are. you are homo sapiens future. i am homo yourmumicus. i literally
own your face. goodbye forever
in loving memory of your best friend john
the i think you all fools and should try to get a life because you created
the one you made that you hate. you dig?
you all are sad that you want to kill yourselves. Why not make the rest of
your life count.
"drink milk"
admirable sentiments young nick, i agree with you totoally because unlike
all these people you are not a cock and i go to school with you.
ALL
THESE KIDS LOOSE, AND THAT DUDE WHO SAID HE WANTED TO BE A VAMPIRE, YOUVE
BEEN WATCHING TO MUCH BUFFY.
love john the what if a 10 mile wide asteroid was heading for your
face, would you be happy? cool
have you done your English homework yet?
we had english homework? which one?
the essay about how stupid it is to kill yourself.
i wrote about eleven pages on the stupid ways. I think it should be
illegal to kill yourself honestly
i rember that one, they brought in a suicidal person and we poked him and
asked him questions but he didnt answer cos he was so doped up and wanted
to be cool and get attention.
love your mum, plain and simple
plz help im bleeding right now ive just cut my ristss sjmmmjfg
i hope you bleed to death you fucking nob head ........bleed bitch bleed
HI all
I am here for any one who wants a chat about anything i wont
judge you just listen to you
Sean
Like Hamlet i have to chose betwen LiFe and DeAtH, Im choseing DeAtH.
1st idea off motorway brige. Drink 1lt of vodak and take all my pills i
got. Rope so i'd hang but lower enought so i could be hit by a lorry say.
3 ways i shuod go
2nd Bath full of water, wire a plug with a metal bar insted of
fuse..never go out. Wire into bath..wodeen stick to switvch on. Set elci
box to never go off.
3rd Steal helim clinder from my old work. breath laods n till i stave
of O2.
4th Blow my self up at petrol sation...might happens but not sure.
5th try and snap my neck...get it right pain free fast simple and
effective
Ive had such a shit week, im so depressed and i just want to die. Nothing
seems to be going right in my life at the moment. I hate it and im
planning on ending it pretty soon.
i sit all alone most the time thinkin y am i alive is god tryin 2 torment
me but i h8 me so much half the time i feel like commitin suicide but i am
2 scared 2 it feels like i am trapped 4 eva and the only way out it iz if
som1 kills me 4 me.
poo i dont no y u r sayin dat coz the shit ur sayin aint even true if u
felt like we did u would understand just coz u luv ur life dont mean that
u can say stuff like that 2 ppl hu aint and y the fuck would sum1 kill
them selves coz sum1 wont ask them out and even if they did y should u
poke ur big nose in2 their problems if u dont understand ppl hu feel bad
bout themselves then fuck off
cooooooooooooooooooooongratulations lucy, your the lucky winner of the 'I
wonder how long i can annow these fools with my friends until they say
something'. You have won absolutely nothing because who cares if i dont
understand what your going through because thats got nothing to do with me
:). Please find a sense of dark humour and try to write more one this
because were having fun. Once again congratulations and dont try to use
the 'you dont understand us' thing because its a bit gay and it makes you
look like somebody from kilroy.
love john the i am happy and your not
lalalalala cool
ive just noticed you said poo at the front of your thing to, you loose so
very badly. Have a fun day:).
And by the way everything anyone says is very true once you get down to
it. Were the only species on this earth that WANTS to commit suicide and i
dont know why. Keep the posts coming in folks.
This is probably the final post im going to do but i might come back to
popular demand.
Its time to tell all you kids the truth: You did this to yourselves, so
you can deal with it. Nice and simple isnt it.
And rember kids, dont go out at night because lucy could be waiting for
you to try and make sense or get some good spelling.
keep safe my dear
dear little lemmings and lets remember one thing. if you feel like killing
yourself, then do it and see what happens. Because your going to die and
you wont be coming back or going anywhere. You will just cease to exsist
as if you were neather conceived. Thank you.
Love john 'im glad i knew what i was doing with my life' cool
I have actually just read through most of this crap and noticed that there
are less suicidal posts then people telling them to shut up and piss off
because this is a thingy thing ABOUT suicide chat rooms. So lets just
remeber that you all loose apart from perhaps matt and becky and nick and
me and lucy looses the most because she sucks her dad off in her garden
shed.
love from everyone on the 'Suicidal is for loosers who just want
attention and cany deal with anything themselves because they make
everything really big when all they did was not mow the lawn' team
IM sick of feeling so alone, people lookin down theyre noses at me because
of self harm, just because they dont understand wht real pain feels like,
the pain in my head is like cement it wont go away. please help me
YOU ARE ALONE.. you selfish nothing.. you want to die, die.. your sad,
pathetic, self obsessed, lonely, meaningless sacks of skin. you sicken me,
you make me want to hate you.. your not worrth the money your loving
parents spend on you, and the blades you use to hurt yourselves..
take a
look around.. your more selfish and arrogant than i first expected if your
only defence is "you dont know".. i dont know, but you do, YOUR THE ONE
WHO SHOULD BE COMBATTING YOUR PROBLEMS..
take a good look at yourself, and then decide whether to end it, dont
inform everyone else of how self obsessed and ignorant you really are..
N.B. the person who wanted to kill him self in a bath; have you never
heard of a circuit breaker.. do some physics you primitive fuck head..
I agree. All i have to say
love from the Suicide death sqaud of
yourmumsville.
n.b nobody likes you or your goat loving face
Farewell cruel world
Hey, look everyone, im really sorry for all this.
today my whole world came crashing down because of some mistake i did. Now
im in the same place as you and i hate my life. I want to hurt myself for
all the bad crap thats happend and i can feel the blood oozing out and
going all over the Persian rug ($295 ebay). IM SO SORRY IF I HURT YOUR
FEELINGS i need to kill myself, i think im going to do it now and break
the good dinner plates.
Im so sorry all you guys, i thought i was happy but i wasn’t so its
goodbye from me. i need help.
But wait, no. i dont because im not gay vampire 'dont know much about
physics' daddy sucking 'i did this to myself on purpose but im not gonna
tell anyone shit it went a bit to far now im dead and its not all its
cracked up to be' anal dwarf.
in loving memory of john 'god damn better believe it' McCool
do any of u have any idea what its like to feel like that, like u wanna
die every second of every day u dont care how r why. like u cant ignore
stuff anymore because its gettin2much n u got no-one to talk to about it
because no-one cares. do u no how alone a person can feel even when
surrounded by hundreds of people, no? well i do
Well woop de doo for you eminembabe. And no i dont know what it feels like
because i know i wont ever get it. hey the only worry ive got is if i get
a d on my business exam.
So why dont you goons just suck it up and fucking live with it you little
whiny homfags. YOU made these problems YOURSELF now live with it.
So when you feel in your darkest hour just think ' you know what, i am a
real cock if i kill myself just because something bad happend'. Oh no my
parents are dead and i have no home and i have to take medication and i am
fat and have spots. I know what ill kill myself and be like those really
cool kids you see in the street everyday with there big old baggy clothes
and there little scars they painted on their wrists to make it look like
theve cut them because there so cool.
Big smiles everyone now. especially you eminembabetakenanallybyyourdad.
wanna die. dieing 2nite. try n stop me pleeeez! hahaha!
Well, I didn't watch any tv show, I must have been at work, but I see
there is alot of new posts on here, I tried reading them all, actually I
did read them, but they didn't stick in my head.
To all the people who have been posting on here just to be funny, thank
you, because you did nothing to hurt me or make me feel bad. I just got a
good laugh out of your foolishness.
I'm sorry to hear about all the new people on here wanting to commit
suicide, I really hope your able to work things out, and I hope you find
what you need before it is to late. I haven't been the best, but I do feel
better.
And by th eway, to the people who made the comments, if you want to die,
kill yourself, people can't control what they feel, and they seek help,
because they don't actually want to die, they just can't control their
feelings.
If all you jokers think we are worthless and in your way, why do you come
in here? stay away and you'll have no problem.
oki... i read all the comments up to the point "Chris" said he was off to
kill himself, and if he didnt post something in the next two days that he
had sucseeded.... there has been no posts fromhim since... unless i have
just missed them... dont any of u care? if u are suicidal arnt u jealous?
i just thought it was weird no1 has commented on the fact "chris" has
dissapeared.... oh, and dus anyone know if suicidal tendancies run in
families... i have hurd that they do, but am not sure, thanks, Tas
i know u all are probs sick of reading this stuff, but i just gotta say to
my granda, Gemma, and Karl, three people i know who have killed
themselves.... i envy you.... i admire you....
Tas
dan blake u pathetic fuck.... u think ur so hard... so great when u tell
someone to "bleed bitch bleed" when all u are fucking doing is resiting a
line off a eminem song u sad sack of shit. If u dont care give a shit
about suicide or anything remotly related to what is going on in here, why
the fuck did u come here! oh wait, it must be the fact u have nothing
better to do then to go looking for people u can argue with, and put down,
but of course, u chose the wimps way of going about makeing ur ego even
bigger. You decied to pick a group of people who are desparate, vunrable
etc to pick on just to forfill ur self importance, u sad bastard. its
people like you who should die... you should b the one who wants to die!
you dont deserv to live. And deep don u know that.... And its only going
to b a matter of time before ur vunrabe and sum1 is going to come and
squash u like the little insignificant bug u r... sorry people but that is
the politest way i could put it.
Hey everyone. Just want you to know that if you really need to talk to
someone, i am here. I will listen to you and not judge you. I have gone
through many of the things you have and have crawled out that hole. I want
to help.
hi i'm new i've always been depressed i'm fucking up real bad and i'm 18
and still a virgin that makes more depressed i hate myself and my body i
hate everything about me i'm just a fuck up the only way i can get away is
getting high or death but i'm affair to die i feel nothing any more girls
don't like me coz i'm a fuck up a mistake
Chris, you are not a fuck up, I wish you didn't feel the way you do, when
I was your age, I didn't like myself either, I felt ugly and undesrieable.
But I found people who loved me, and thought that I was beautiful. Why
fret over being a virgin, that is a wonderful thing, there's so many
diseases out there. And someday your going to find the right person who's
going to love you, and your going to share this with this person.
Unless your like most of the people in the world, and feel you have to
have sex with thousands of people out there before your a certain age,
then you shouldn't worry. Being a virgin doesn't make you worthless.
And to the comment about us not caring about Chris, yes we do, I worry
about everyone and care.
But I have no way of finding out about him, I don't personally know him. I
don't personally know anyone here.
But why would anyone be jealous if he did commit suicide, I would be
truelly saddened, but not jealous.
I get so depressed that I would like to kill myself, or at least that is
how I feel, but I want help, and I'm trying to find that help.
I am not greety, I do not want to hurt the ones in my life, I am not
looking for pitty or attention, I am seeking help.
If me wanting help, and coming in here because it helps relieve some
stress, if that is me feeling sorry for myself. Well, leave me alone, at
least it is a way of me living, and not destroying my loved ones.
I don't want to feel this way, I'm sure no one does, I'm trying to find
help, and a cure, so if it makes people to feel better to put me down, so
be it.
I won't stop you, go ahead, tell me to kill myself,
because my problems go deeper than someone telling me to go ahead and do
it.
Your words won't hurt me, so go ahead and amuse yourself, your only
wasting your own time.
Hello there my little lemmings,
Ive got something fun for you today. if
you want to kill yourself then why dont you have some fun whilst doing it.
For instance you could start of the day by going to your place of work
wearing whatever the hell you want and then proceeding to attack whatever
pissed you off. After lunch you can bring in a dead goat from outside ,
gut it, and put it on somebodys desk as a nice suprise after they come
back from their pub lunch.
When you are told to see the boss for some reason you can just generally
sit down or put your genitals against the big window and make funny faces
after which the guards will come and kick you out but dont forget ,that on
the way to the door, to relieve yourself against a
plant,wall,computer,receptionist.
Well thats work done so how about a nice leisurly stroll down the park
stopping on the way to kick some dogs and small punk kids with 'lost'
carved into their arms. Perhaps you could bring a ball along to and have a
nice kick around trying to hurt small creatures and having a nice chat to
some elderly folk about the reproductive system and if they would like to
accompany you to a brothel this evening. Now exit the park and perhaps
steal a law enforcers hat on the way.
And rember to try engage dawrfs into convorsation with you on your way.
Thats the afternoon over with bang and i think its time for a quick
snack and the local snackery, but whats this, you have no money so go to
the bank and pretend to hold it up, withdraw all your money then say you
were joking with a big grin and walk out with your/best friends money.
Hmm what to buy, bagel with honey, bagette with salad, just a drink, small
coffee oh the decicions oh the humanity.
With your belly full and a nice big smile take a nice walk back to your
house admiring all the things on your way back like the kids in the middle
of the road and the birds wailing (rember to steal ball and kill small
bird and splatter small kids with brains of said bird).
Upon getting to your street go into you neighbors house and generally
lounge around and perhaps and a light beer whilst watching some good
movies.
Upon hearing your neighbors return stroll out the front door to greet
them before going into your own home and preparing for a fun filled
evening.
Get dressed in whatever you want to head on into town and/or your local
hoe down (you way want to take some blunt objects).
After slaughtering the dwarf you were talking to a few hours before and
showing your new puppet show called 'Me and my magic dwarf brains' to the
elderly couple proceed to the nearest hospital and try to accquire some
nice diseases such as aids or flesh eating moths. With these in your
pocket go to the nearest brothel/club and try to get as many people as
possible but keep your best diseases at your disposal. After walking out
go down the street to a shop and buy a nice drink to cool you down, your
going to need it. Go to the butchers and get alot of meat products and
then go and put them through everyones mouth who walks past you on your
walk to the nearest news station.
Upone getting to the news station unleash you evil virus of doom into
the main reception area and gennerally duck. When you hear a few thuds and
no more canarys go out and up to the broadcasting area. Put yourself on tv
and say that a large meteor is heading straight for a certain person and
also on your way out add a few peoples names to the sex offeders list.
By this time you may have some certain law enforcers after you so its a
good idea to have a nice jog from now on. Make your way to the nearest
cinema and systematicly maim everyone in your sight with a lighter, small
wooden stick, some sand and a handful of nails.
Make your way out and dont forget to step on people trying to get to the
exit , on your way out anally rape the pimpled teenager who drops his
popcorn and take a picture of him before putting it on the internet (this
could also be done at the broadcasting place you were just at).
Now there will be lots of law enforcers outside with their large sitcks to
gang rape you so you will have to run quite fast out of the back entrace
(on the way setting a mad goat on some hobos) to the nearest of public
place (after enjecting yourself with a very nast std) and rape everyone in
the building including the janitor who always gets away by hiding.
At this point you may have angry people with pitchforks and fire after
your ass so you could either attack them and die, or run away and live.
If you decided to run you made the right choice as you are now back home
and have an entire phone book at your disposal. Ring up everyone you dont
like and say something bad to them. Here is a simple messege to get you
started;
Ring ring
Mother: Hello?
You: Sup g
Mother:Oh hello dear, i didnt recognise your post-slaughter voice
You:bitch isnt it.
Mother:very much so, so whats up
You: clouds mostly
Mother:Oh ok
You:Im going to set your hose on fire when the family come down for
christmas.
Mother: what was that dear?
You:I said i was going to hurt lots of people in a variety of different
ways.
Mother: Not this again dear!
You: Actually im feeling alot better, (crash of a window ,FREEZE!) ive got
to go now, see you at christmas.
Mother:Ok dear lots of kisses
You:Kiss Kiss
Hang up
The police are now in your house so you can flee to your neighbors
house because they are now asleep.
its 10 o clock
its 10:15 and you feel much better now and no longer suicidal because
youve vented your emotions. So grab a light beer, put your feet up on the
freshly decapitated head and watch your neighbors nice big televion which
lots of nice sound. So there we go, a perfect day and your back in time
for a good action film, tut tut you think, people always think this is
what spawns violent behavior.
Have fun kids. Big smiles now
love john the 'im happy and your not BOO BOO SNIFF SNIFF ' Cool
Glad to hear that were making people laugh, its good to be foolish. And
has anyone else noticed that most of you listen to M&Ms music. Just
wondering.
Love The international organisation of suicide bitch clowns
Just a quick one for debbie there (bet her cousins said that a few times),
Yea here you go with all that shit again and you said why are we here.
well sit down , and dont fling yourself of it, and ill tell you a story.
I found this acient land by accident when that thing was on channel 4
(which i didnt watch) so i searched for it and it led me hear saying it
was the first hit for google which it was.
When here i read the first one from that guy and he said this was a place
DISCUSSING suicide chat rooms. Did we all see the capital letters, good
boys and girls.
And now we are hear, with all of you lecturing are fun.
SO SUCK IT UP DEBBIE (shes heard that to MUHA)
love those funny clowns
i'm a different chris debbie that stuff you said at the end at the of the
message wasn't me
and its not just being a virgin every girl i've gone out with or done
stuff with not sex i can't feel anything i'm just lifless so why live if
you have no life like me
Crack, if you're going to post then at least use the correct term of
"Here". Look at the end of your post you uneducated fool. Hear Hear Hear,
what an idiot.
Im sorry i didnt know there was a certain code for 'posting', thank you
for calling me uneducated because that is infact true as i have not even
finished higher education yet.
Your mum bob, your mum.
Big smiles and have a fun day :)
N.B We have posted other comments about you under certain names, try
and guess which one and you might win nothing.
another day in the shity life of me no change i still h8 bein me i h8
every1 slaggin me off coz of wot i look like i h8 bein ignored i cant even
look in the mirror wivout thinkin omg wot the fuck is it i h8 bein thick
and really unlucky.
hello.... erm... im new here, hey lucy. i know how you feel.
i do the same, look in the mirror and think "who is that"
well i found out that drugs arent the answer to escaping reality. im 14,
yesterday and i had some...erm... stuff and ended up vomiting everywere
and my mother found out.
i use to cut myself but i cant anymore. and im back feeling really shity
again and im not sure why i came here but i thought i would give this a
shot instead of giving up..
hi all I am back around if any one wants to talk
sean
msn: here4u55@hotmail.com
u sad bastards wanna kill ureselfs then do it and stop annoying the
fucking rest of us with ure chattin if u really wanted to do it u would
have done it already ive done it its not hard people dont feel sorry for u
so shut up get the fuck on with life u sad twats my number is 07906142626
ask for kelly and if u really wanna kill ureself then ill fucking help u u
sad bastards hahahahahahaha u should all die u sad bastards
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
I think our posts were better. They had goats and dwarfs in them :)
Love
sean (herefurmum55@hotmail.com), cos he has not friends. You can just tell
cant you......
Since you kids are worried about who likes eminem, well I'll share my
taste of music with you. YES, I like eminem, I like Korn, Tool, Perfect
Circle, NineInchNails, Pantera, Alice in Chains, Nelly, and all the other
tipical music people listen to.
Hey, is that what depresses me? Since you children know it all, why don't
you be a shrink?
Chris, I know you was a different one, you stated that it was your first
post.
Your life is worth living, no matter what, I was only trying to help you,
I wasn't sure if your post was real, or if you was one of the kids in here
messing around.
Please people, if you really need help, don't let these kids hurt you,
they're just looking for ways to get theirselves off.
Your lives are worth it, I know how hard things are, I'm trying to go on
with life and straighten the bad things up, I find it difficult, but I am
doing better.
I'm not as depressed, but still not cured. But, I found a little peace.
Please hang in there, and just ignore these children, apparently their not
as happy as they seem, or why would they be on a computer, using up all
their time.
I CAN HELP YOU, ILL EVEN LISTEN TO YOU.
If ANY of you need to talk, then
you can call me on 07906142626. Its my mobile and i wont judge you just
listen and give you my advice.
You may think that i dont know what your going through but i do, over a
year ago both my parents were killed in a car crash on their way back from
christmas shopping. My girlfriend dumped me after this and i went into
deep depression and felt nobody was listening to me. I managed to climb
out of that hole and now im here ready to help.
JUST CALL 07906142626 AND I WILL TRY TO HELP YOU. JUST RING UP AND POUR
YOURSELF OUT. TRUST ME IT WILL HELP. SO PLEASE CALL ME.
SEAN
Dear Debbie,
Thank you for prooving our point.
Love from all of your friends here at Debbie think she knows what shes
doing and will continue to try and undermine us by calling us children as
we used 'kids' in our posts.
N.B the outright to offensive ones arnt ours by the way. We dont do
that kind of crap. We only do your mums. Especially yours.
:) its fun to be us.
Mum, what exactly is mum? you people need to go somewhere else and find
children your age to play with, then again, most children your age don't
act like you. Can't you see these peoeple need help? not critizism. Why
would you want to ruin anyones life? You have your own to worry about, you
better be careful, something bad might happen, and bring you to this same
place. I'm not talking about stupid mistaches, like running a credit card
up, or scratching your new car, or simple stuff.
And most of these peolple are in here for more personal and serious
problems.
Problems they have no control over, problems that can't be cured by a
simple pill. Some people have had bad shit happen to them, that some
people usually don't live through, and are lucky to still be here, also
are lucky they have found the strength to go on as long as they have.
People's live aren't a joke, you shouldn't tell people to go ahead and end
it, you never know what event's are going to happen in your lifes. I know
people that are sad and depressed all the time, but tell me that they
still feel like killing and they don't know why I feel like dying.
These people have never had anything as bad happen in hteir lives, that
happened in mine.
you people that are in here playing all these games, I'm glad that you are
happy and full of life,
I'm happy to see that not all of our young youth don't have these
problems, and aren't fucked up like most. I don't want anyone feeling the
way I do, or the way that most suicidal people feel.
And if coming in here and typing the way you all are, if that is part of
being happy, then please keep it up, because I don't want you to feel this
way, I actually envy you, and wish I felt the same.
You probably don't realize how lucky you are, and you have what most of us
want, a half way decent life. Your comments make me feel somewhat better,
because I see that life can actually be better.
I have children, I know they like to play and have fun.
hi im not gona b like a depressed teenager and say "ooo my lifes shit and
i want to die blabla" but i do go threw that feeling alot i just feel like
im not wanted by ne1 i got a boy friend and i felt liked by at least one
person and like finally i hav something to live 4 then we broke up and i
went down hill again .people say "jst talk to poeple u love and that love
u like yr family " but its my family that are the problom they jst always
act like im a little person thats not ment to be here and always agnore me
which is the same with my froends ahhhhh no1 eva takes me seriously eva
and then they always wonder y i get annoyed wne thhey laugh at me ok im
sure u hav had enoguh of reading bout me complaining but its really
annoyni casue i dont want to go to the doctors or ne1 casue i no they wont
listen to me like everyone else wel byebye thankx 4 lettin me say wot i
think
To all the people that come here and say 'we should kill ourselfs" and
"you're all stupid"
you one of them? well good listen up
1)not your problem if we have this site
2)dont like it? dont come it to!!!
3)do you have any idea what any of us feel? NO
4) try have one of your close friends kill themselfs and then say that
bulshit
got something to say? sireslut@hotmail.com
and to any one else that isnt a criticizing asshole feel feel to mail me
if you wanta talk.
OMG!I can't beleive that people can say that!! I totally agree with u
bella,i added u btw! Hope u dont mind! If any1 here will talk,or listen
then i wud so luv 2 hear from u! I thought I'd got over bein like this but
I've started cutting myself again and its worse than ever...i need a way
out! :(
Rosemary I am 36 and my family still treat me like I am just a piece of
nothingness. It's not them who will change it is you who will have to show
them that they are the ones who are 'nothing'
ok i have so much to say but nothing really worth saying. its like i want
to cry out but i cant stand doing it, so i just suppress everything. drugs
pacify some of the anger for a while, but its all muddled, there is no
point to this just a message into the night....
im going through some crazy shit im 15 and have been on crack cocaine 4
one year and a bit im feeling really depressed and feel like dieing.
GOD
HELP US ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALL U MAN ARE CRAZY MOTHER FUKERS INSTEAD OF WRITING UR PROBLEMS ON THIS
SHITTY WEB SITE GO TO A MENTAL HOSPITAL OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT COZ U MAN
AINT RIGHT IN DA HEAD!!!OR JUS KILL UR SELFS COZ WE DONT NEED MUTHAFUKERS
LIKE U IN DA WORLD!!!!!!
FUK U ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(p.s SILLY PIECES OF SHIT DIE ALL OF U DIE)
IVE PLANNED MY DEATH 4 2 MONTHS ONLY BUT EVERYTHING IS GOING PERFECTLY
2DAY IS MY LAST DAY I'LL KEEP U GUYS INFORMED!!!
This interesting :). Finanlly you people have stood up for yourselves.
Well we all had fun and a few laughs and now i feel its time for you to go
back to hating yourself for no reason and for me to continue being happy.
Oh well. for all you american people We have all done your MOM cos she
likes her ass to be pounded by large black men. Goodbye.
N.B your moms not that good.
lets see what you all say to this. come on its not like were getting
offended or anything.
Additional:
Why do you all refer to this as your site.
Its not your site , apart from the peoples whos it is. and also this isnt
a site about suicide or for you to dump your problems lemmings. Its ABOUT
and DISCUSSING suicide chat rooms. when will you listen my little
lemmings.
Love ILMM
If u wanna kill urself why don't u go out and make something of ur life
instead of just hating it.
Very good point. I agree. U r quite something. Well done. All of us should
be just like this person.
Yea i agree with him too> we should bow down before him because he has
fast internet capabilites.
SO WOT DO U PPL THINK I SHOULD DO WITH MY ADDICTION!!!!!!!IM 4 SOME REASON
REALLY ANCTIUS TO KNOW!!!IVE JUS FINISHED GETTING CHARGED!!AND I FEEL
GREAT!!!
well hello-hello again
i agree lucy, they are.
dre? hi, i would just like to say crack is one thing that'll fuck up your
head more then any other shit. its just a step down from heroin. please
never do that!! it breaks up familys and hurts absaluty every one around
you
ever wanta talk? im always online and i alway reply and i have alot of
experiance with most reactions of depression so nothing shocks me and im
not one of those horrible people that thinks i know what your going
through because ive read one psychology book.
mail me ; sireslut@hotmail.com (dont judge me on my email name =)
hiya itz me again i seem 2 come on this site alot but i dont no hu 2 talk
2 bout it and i thought coz u lot might understand. i still feel shit and
ugly and fat and usless but i dont no how 2 end my life so im stuck here
writin this 2 u sorry if im annoyin u but i need some ppl 2 talk 2 neway
thanx 4 puttin up wiv my problems.
its realy good to commit a suicide cause we hav got nothing to do with our
lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
well lucy im sure i would understand, so email me.
we can talk and even if i dont help what have you got to lose?
have a bit of trust in this world that it might be worth holding onto.
LUCY EMAIL ME
to lucy, your not the only one who feels like this trust me the only
reason im still alive is because i don't want to let my mum down i know
she would be really upset and i bet yours would aswell just think about it
does any one know how long it takes to die if you slit your rists
does any one know who suicidal blue biscuit is and if he reads wthis who
are you and what school do you go to
you neverknow i could go to the same school as you
guys i hope noone in here is wanting to kill themselves because they cant
find love or something cause if some of you are,then you never know maybe
i could be your soul mate!
This room is to discuss how stupid chat rooms r. Not to try get a
boyfriend
your only a soul mate if you understand
It's not to discuss how stupid chatrooms are its to discuss suicide.and im
not looking for a boyfriend i was merely pointing out that if some of you
have trouble in love that their not alone 50 % of the population are
single!!!
Wanting to end the pain is no joke as it appears to be with some of you
out there.Feeling alone and helpless is so common, but what is even more
common is the number of people who just look the other way. They just
refuse to see what is under their noses. I am 45 and was a carer for both
my Mum and Dad (cancer). Both died recently, my Mum 8 weeks ago. I have a
large family but I am very much alone. I thought the idea was that we
should all be there for one another. Why is it that when you tell them
that you feel suicidal because you just want the pain to stop, they
suddenly go deaf and very busy?
thanx 4 that sireslut i know it seems strange but since u said that i
thought about it and u must be da only person ever 2 have helped me out in
a year i havent spoke to anyone about it!!!so thanx
PLZ WRIGHT BACK!!!!!
Hi I just wanted to say that during my teens I was severely suicidal and
did vaguely attempt to kill myself. I then met my now husband, I realised
that I was a worthwhile and loving person who deserved to live their lices
and be happy. School was hell for me and i hated it, But I realised that i
could change things if i wanted to, and that life is a choice. I still
feel very depressed and times, but know that however much life hurts pain
is better than the void that might just come next.
Hannah UK
your all fucked up lil shit's.what sorta person are you if you cant even
kill yourselve's.you all need to do it once and only 1'nce and get it
fucking right you sad pathetic loser's.why you wanna die any way.life's to
short as it is.go get laid or some thing you usless sonofabitch's!!!!
OCH HELLO!! HOW IS EVRY1?? MY ADVICE TO ANY SUICIDAL PERSON IS.........GO
4 IT, U ONLY LIVE ONCE TEE HEE, WELL AM OFF 4 A CUPPA TEA NOW!! PPL EMAIL
ME!!! AT SUMMERJAM2K3@HOTMAIL.COM!!! L8RZ xx
some one help me please!anyone i need some on eor some thing i just dont
know what it is!ring me pklease 07709634050
hey no problem dre, i hope you do choose to email me or something so maybe
i could have a shot at helping.
remember ; sireslut@hotmail.com
dont be shy hun!!! please do email it would be easier to talk that way
then this way, or if you have msn messager add me. but dont give up and
say i couldnt do anything.
YOU MAY ASWELL TRY!!!
any one can email me if they like, i will listen.
Matt your one strong person to have over come all the troubles you have
had in your life, dont listen to any wankers on here, as with reading all
the messages there are alot of tossers who just dont understand,
take
care
If anyone has ever had 2 make the choice for their children to turn of the
life support machine or a leathal injection to transend their soul beyond
the pain ,i don't think if this was happening ; 1st: if they didn't have
any family. 2nd: Only if they had time Or labtop? 3rd:unfortunatly if they
didn't recieve councilling and needed help (how would a vampire health
system) know what sencitivaty was ? i have played chess against many
people and the object of the GAME is 2 win? So as a loser i unnaturally
felt inadaquote(sorry 4 the spelling but im a disclexiK) hope i havn't
offended anyone ;that certanally wasn't my intention.I CAN B CONTACTED ON
THE SUPPLIED ADDRESS,Please don't abuse it. If we all work together and
try to understand each others dreams,goals etc,in relationship to the
universal oneness of Nrg............ There isn't Anything we can't
overcome well thats what i believe! .i think i have said 2 much.mex
Nina just said somthing to me about reading a post she has just put on
here? I can see one!
hey all! to be honest i havent read any of ur shite coz each person is
different and i doubt u all have anything in common with me at all. im 23
i like a drink i have a lovin girlfriend and family but for sum rason i
cant stand life it is without a doubt the biggest bag of shitei have ever
had to wake up to. i feel pretty selfish writing this coz i know if i do
the deed ill leave people behind, but if im totally honest i couldnt give
a fuck(contradiction i know) as long as im happy and the only way i can
see me being happy is if this shit ends. big kiss to all of u who feeel
the same its a shame weXXXXXXXXX
im really lonely, i cant afford to give my child a party for her birthday,
im so depressed! PLEASE someone call me im really suicidal my number is
00353863424455 im living in cork in ireland so the irish code is added
there
thank you
christine
PLEASE RECONSIDER U MAY FEEL LIKE A PILE OF CRAP RIGHT NOW BUT PLEASE U
MAY B IN PAIN BUT IMAGINE THE HURT TEARS AND AWFUL HELL THAT U R LEAVING
EVERY1 ELSE WITH IF U NEED 2 CHAT TALK TO ME ILL HELP U!U MAY NOT THINK IT
RIGHT NOW BUT U R A VALUED MEMBER OF THIS WORLD THAT IS STRIVING TO
SURVIVE WE NEED UR HELP U NEED TO STAY SO WE CAN GROW TOGETHER AND HELP U
BELONG!!!I WANT TO BELONG ASWELL SO PLEASE PLEASE DNT DO ANYTHING STUPID
THE WORLD WLD BE AN AWFUL PLACE WITHOUT YOU REMEMBER TO THE WORLD U R ONE
PERSON BUT TO ONE PERSON U R THE WORLD!!!
Hey Jim.....im not a suicidal person, well maybe along time ago...my life
was amess and i tried to take the easy way out, i soon relised it was def
the wrong way to go...yeah i was a coward then but not now....i have
problems, but some how they work themselves out eventually....im a
stronger person now for my past mistakes, you have to be strong pal, look
to the future dont dewl in the past or present ....like you said ya got a
loving family, friends and girl friend...u have alot more than most so be
greatful, just take 5 mins to read a few stories above...then ull know
what real problems are.....im not saying you dont have problems but i
thought i had problems until i read the stories above and fuck! im living
a fairy tale life compared to some of these people.......live each day as
if its your last, enjoy having people that love you as there are alot out
there who have no one......im not judging you i just think you have alot
to live for ....so go for it...xxxxx
KELLY........... love, what the fuck are you doing in this room......you
must have led a sheltered life if you would rather come in here and slag
all these people of.........ur the sad losser love.....now u go get a life
Hey LUCY......i feel abit like an agany aunt lol....but ya shouldnt put
urself down love, everyone is special in there own wee way, and im sure u
r a really lovely person...so dont ever let people make u feel bad, when
someone tries to put me down or looks at me funny i just laugh, that makes
them feel like shit cause they dont know what your laughin at, they expect
u to feel like shit.....but dont hold your head up Lucy......and hey i
dont know anyone that could look in the mirror and be happy with what they
see, everyone wants to change something about themselves.....well take
care and be strong...xx
Hey ya can e-mail me on
lynngamble23@hotmail.com
hi evry1
think wot u do before u act u onli have 1 life
add me on msn rachellipman_4@hotmail.com if u need to chat
THINKKKKKKKKK!!!!
XxX
The Abuse Of Psychiatric Patients Is Condoned In The Australian Health
System
Professor Peter J. Doherty who is the director of psychiatry at
the Alfred Hospital in Melbourne, says hospital staff can obtain a history
without the patients knowledge, from people whom the patient has a
restraining order against and he fobs off any suggestion that the
information they provide may be inaccurate. He also claims staff that
mentally, physically and sexually abuse patients are acting within the
provisions of the Mental Health Act and it is appropriate to treat
psychiatric patiens in this manner if they don’t cooperate. Furthermore,
he believes that doctors and nurses have the right to deny patients their
rights, including the right to phone the Office of the Public Advocate.
The Victorian Health Services Commissioner Beth Wilson, stated that it is
reasonable and appropriate to certify someone if they are uncooperative.
Furthermore, Beth Wilson doesn’t care that people are being falsely
imprisoned in psychiatric hospitals because doctors and nurses don’t check
the accuracy of information. Needless to say, she is quick to dismiss
complaints against medical and nursing staff that abuse psychiatric
patients. Beth Wilson also believes it is not unreasonable for doctors and
nurses to torture, suffocate and sexual molest psychiatric patients; in
fact according to her, this is an appropriate way to manage uncooperative
patients.
The Chief Psychiatrist also maintains, that hospital staff can collect
information about a patient from anyone and they don’t need to check the
accuracy of the information provided by that person; since a doctor will
conduct a clinical assessment to establish whether a patient needs
involuntary treatment.
A Psychiatric assessment determines whether a person meets five
subjective criteria that are listed in the Mental Health Act. However, all
subjective evaluations are based on or influenced by personal feelings.
Thus if an abusive relative slandered you, this could influence the
doctors decision to detained you as an involuntary patient under the
Mental Health Act. Because the doctor doesn’t have to verify the accuracy
of the information, he or she only has to determine if you appear to be
mentally ill, as this is one of the criteria you have to meet. Once they
decide you appear to be mentally ill, they simply determine if your
illness requires treatment and whether or not you need to be admitted to
hospital for that treatment. If they decide you meet all the criteria they
can detain and drug you against your will and the drugs they give you have
dreadful side effects.
The Department of human services claim people can be detained in a
General Hospital under the mental health act for up to 72 hours, without a
psychiatric assessment. The hospital can then transfer the patient to a
Psychiatric Hospital whereby they could be held for a further 24 hours
before an Authorised Psychiatrist has to assess them. The Department of
Human Services further states, if a patients is detained under the Mental
Health Act in a General Hospital or an Emergency Department of a General
Hospital for medical treatment, that patient is not entitled any of the
provisions or rights mentioned in the Mental Health Act.
Thus according to the Department of Human Services, a patient can be
detained in a general hospital and denied all their rights for 3 days then
transferred to a Psychiatric Hospital and declared insane.
The Health Minister Bronwyn Pike totally dismisses complaints that
prove the Department of Human Services tell psychiatric patients they have
no rights under the Mental Health Act and or deliberately misinform
patients about their rights, to cover up the abuse in psychiatric
facilities. Minister Pike simply fobs the issue off, claiming it is the
responsibility of lawyers rather than doctors and nurses to inform
patients of their rights under the Mental Health Act.
IN AUSTRALIA
Doctors & Nurses Use Their Power To Abuse
On the 12-8-96, I was taken to
the Alfred Hospital in Melbourne and certified when I arrived at the
hospital. No one would tell me why they were detaining me. But they kept
me under security watch, so that I couldn’t leave.
On the 13-8-96, a student psychiatrist at the Alfred called Dr David
Weissman accused me of a number of things, including taking an overdose
that I had neither taken nor been treated for and he demanded to know why
I had obtained a restraining order.
About an hour later, a nurse called Andrew Ryan informed me that I was
being sent to Heatherton Hospital as an involuntary patient. I tried to
leave the Alfred hospital, however four staff members tied me face down on
the trolley, shackling my arms and legs to the bottom railing of the
trolley. A female nurse then pulled my pants down in front of the three
males in the room and injected me with a sedative. One of the male
security guards placed his hand on the back of my head and pushed my face
into the pillow, when I tried to move my head to the side to get air, he
pushed my face further into the pillow.
My arms were then taped tightly against the downward railings on each
side of the trolley. This caused excruciating pain in my arms, shoulders,
back, and chest. I could feel my self suffocating and thought I was going
to die. The male nurse Andrew Ryan then turned the lights off in the
cubical I was in and said, “Scream away as much as you want, no one can
hear you.” I was continually sedated with drugs that suppress respiration
and though I begged to be turned onto my back, my pleas were ignored and I
was told to shut up.
They kept me shackled face down for over two hours, gasping for air.
Eventually after I passed out, they turned me over and administered
oxygen, then transferred me to Heatherton psychiatric hospital.
When I arrived at Heatherton hospital, I was wheeled straight into the
seclusion room where about four psychiatric nurses were waiting. The
seclusion room was very cold, but within minutes of my of my arrival a
female psychiatric nurse pulled the gown that I was wearing off me and she
held me down while a male psychiatric nurse called Rob Fryer pulled my
tracksuit pants and underpants off me. They then took all the bedding and
my clothes from the room leaving me stark naked and I hadn’t even seen a
doctor. A male psychiatric nurse called Eddie Robison was watching me
through the window.
I was refused a book of my rights and denied the right to phone a
public advocate. They kept me naked on a filthy floor and put their hands
all over me, grabbing my flesh as they held me down and drugged me. Nurses
dragged me across the floor, through a puddle of urine and held me down on
my back with my legs spread apart while Rob Fryer and a female nurse
examined me. Then they turned me over and pushed my face into the urine.
Following this they turned me on my back again and kept me pined down in
the puddle of urine. Rob Fryer and Eddie Robison clutched pillowslips
against my breasts and genitals, while a Dr Thomas Fong insert an
intravenous cannula in my arm and drugged me. Then they took the
pillowslips and fled the room, leaving me naked. What’s more, Rob Fryer,
threatened to have me charged if I did anything to them.
For a total of two and a half hours, I was kept naked with males
watching me through the window. Every time I complained they drugged me
and a female nurse said, “tell someone who cares.” When I told them that I
wanted a shower, they ignored me. Even when I started menstruating, the
nurses wouldn’t give me anything. My dignity and self-esteem were striped
away from me.
They kept me locked in the seclusion room at Heatherton hospital for
16¼ hrs and I wasn’t given any food, fluids or toilet facilities for 22½
hours.
After they had abused me a psychiatrist called Dr Prabaker Rasan Thomas
assessed me on the 14-8-96. He upheld my involuntary status, claiming I
was mentally disturbed. Then he passed my file over to a Dr D. Sholl and
that was the last I saw of the psychiatrist. However, I was detained on
that ward for 3 weeks, whereby had to look at the staff that debased me
and I was denied a second opinion. Those doctors and nurses crushed my
sole and emotionally scarred me for life.
On the 2/9/96, they released me from Heatherton hospital on a Community
Treatment Order. Three weeks later the Mental Health Review Board took me
off the Community Treatment Order, because I didn’t meet all the criteria
required to detain a person as an involuntary patient under the Mental
Health Act.
I’ve spent years writing complaints to the Health Services
Commissioner, Department of Human Services and the Health Minister, but
they tried to fob me off claiming the abuse I received was appropriate
care and treatment. What’s more, lawyers won’t do anything about this
because they claim psychiatric patients aren’t worth fighting for; even
though the new Chief Psychiatrist acknowledged in a letter dated the
23-6-03, that some aspects of my treatment were illegal.
Its no wonder the Victorian Suicide Prevention Task Force found that
90% of suicides were committed by people who had undergone some form of
Psychotherapy and most of them had been in psychiatric hospitals.
The Abuse Of Psychiatric Patients Is Condoned In The Australian Health
System
Professor Peter J. Doherty who is the director of psychiatry at
the Alfred Hospital in Melbourne, says hospital staff can obtain a history
without the patients knowledge, from people whom the patient has a
restraining order against and he fobs off any suggestion that the
information they provide may be inaccurate. He also claims staff that
mentally, physically and sexually abuse patients are acting within the
provisions of the Mental Health Act and it is appropriate to treat
psychiatric patiens in this manner if they don’t cooperate. Furthermore,
he believes that doctors and nurses have the right to deny patients their
rights, including the right to phone the Office of the Public Advocate.
The Victorian Health Services Commissioner Beth Wilson, stated that it is
reasonable and appropriate to certify someone if they are uncooperative.
Furthermore, Beth Wilson doesn’t care that people are being falsely
imprisoned in psychiatric hospitals because doctors and nurses don’t check
the accuracy of information. Needless to say, she is quick to dismiss
complaints against medical and nursing staff that abuse psychiatric
patients. Beth Wilson also believes it is not unreasonable for doctors and
nurses to torture, suffocate and sexual molest psychiatric patients; in
fact according to her, this is an appropriate way to manage uncooperative
patients.
The Chief Psychiatrist also maintains, that hospital staff can collect
information about a patient from anyone and they don’t need to check the
accuracy of the information provided by that person; since a doctor will
conduct a clinical assessment to establish whether a patient needs
involuntary treatment.
A Psychiatric assessment determines whether a person meets five
subjective criteria that are listed in the Mental Health Act. However, all
subjective evaluations are based on or influenced by personal feelings.
Thus if an abusive relative slandered you, this could influence the
doctors decision to detained you as an involuntary patient under the
Mental Health Act. Because the doctor doesn’t have to verify the accuracy
of the information, he or she only has to determine if you appear to be
mentally ill, as this is one of the criteria you have to meet. Once they
decide you appear to be mentally ill, they simply determine if your
illness requires treatment and whether or not you need to be admitted to
hospital for that treatment. If they decide you meet all the criteria they
can detain and drug you against your will and the drugs they give you have
dreadful side effects.
The Department of human services claim people can be detained in a
General Hospital under the mental health act for up to 72 hours, without a
psychiatric assessment. The hospital can then transfer the patient to a
Psychiatric Hospital whereby they could be held for a further 24 hours
before an Authorised Psychiatrist has to assess them. The Department of
Human Services further states, if a patients is detained under the Mental
Health Act in a General Hospital or an Emergency Department of a General
Hospital for medical treatment, that patient is not entitled any of the
provisions or rights mentioned in the Mental Health Act.
Thus according to the Department of Human Services, a patient can be
detained in a general hospital and denied all their rights for 3 days then
transferred to a Psychiatric Hospital and declared insane.
The Health Minister Bronwyn Pike totally dismisses complaints that
prove the Department of Human Services tell psychiatric patients they have
no rights under the Mental Health Act and or deliberately misinform
patients about their rights, to cover up the abuse in psychiatric
facilities. Minister Pike simply fobs the issue off, claiming it is the
responsibility of lawyers rather than doctors and nurses to inform
patients of their rights under the Mental Health Act.
IN AUSTRALIA
Doctors & Nurses Use Their Power To Abuse
On the 12-8-96, I was taken to
the Alfred Hospital in Melbourne and certified when I arrived at the
hospital. No one would tell me why they were detaining me. But they kept
me under security watch, so that I couldn’t leave.
On the 13-8-96, a student psychiatrist at the Alfred called Dr David
Weissman accused me of a number of things, including taking an overdose
that I had neither taken nor been treated for and he demanded to know why
I had obtained a restraining order.
About an hour later, a nurse called Andrew Ryan informed me that I was
being sent to Heatherton Hospital as an involuntary patient. I tried to
leave the Alfred hospital, however four staff members tied me face down on
the trolley, shackling my arms and legs to the bottom railing of the
trolley. A female nurse then pulled my pants down in front of the three
males in the room and injected me with a sedative. One of the male
security guards placed his hand on the back of my head and pushed my face
into the pillow, when I tried to move my head to the side to get air, he
pushed my face further into the pillow.
My arms were then taped tightly against the downward railings on each
side of the trolley. This caused excruciating pain in my arms, shoulders,
back, and chest. I could feel my self suffocating and thought I was going
to die. The male nurse Andrew Ryan then turned the lights off in the
cubical I was in and said, “Scream away as much as you want, no one can
hear you.” I was continually sedated with drugs that suppress respiration
and though I begged to be turned onto my back, my pleas were ignored and I
was told to shut up.
They kept me shackled face down for over two hours, gasping for air.
Eventually after I passed out, they turned me over and administered
oxygen, then transferred me to Heatherton psychiatric hospital.
When I arrived at Heatherton hospital, I was wheeled straight into the
seclusion room where about four psychiatric nurses were waiting. The
seclusion room was very cold, but within minutes of my of my arrival a
female psychiatric nurse pulled the gown that I was wearing off me and she
held me down while a male psychiatric nurse called Rob Fryer pulled my
tracksuit pants and underpants off me. They then took all the bedding and
my clothes from the room leaving me stark naked and I hadn’t even seen a
doctor. A male psychiatric nurse called Eddie Robison was watching me
through the window.
I was refused a book of my rights and denied the right to phone a
public advocate. They kept me naked on a filthy floor and put their hands
all over me, grabbing my flesh as they held me down and drugged me. Nurses
dragged me across the floor, through a puddle of urine and held me down on
my back with my legs spread apart while Rob Fryer and a female nurse
examined me. Then they turned me over and pushed my face into the urine.
Following this they turned me on my back again and kept me pined down in
the puddle of urine. Rob Fryer and Eddie Robison clutched pillowslips
against my breasts and genitals, while a Dr Thomas Fong insert an
intravenous cannula in my arm and drugged me. Then they took the
pillowslips and fled the room, leaving me naked. What’s more, Rob Fryer,
threatened to have me charged if I did anything to them.
For a total of two and a half hours, I was kept naked with males
watching me through the window. Every time I complained they drugged me
and a female nurse said, “tell someone who cares.” When I told them that I
wanted a shower, they ignored me. Even when I started menstruating, the
nurses wouldn’t give me anything. My dignity and self-esteem were striped
away from me.
They kept me locked in the seclusion room at Heatherton hospital for
16¼ hrs and I wasn’t given any food, fluids or toilet facilities for 22½
hours.
After they had abused me a psychiatrist called Dr Prabaker Rasan Thomas
assessed me on the 14-8-96. He upheld my involuntary status, claiming I
was mentally disturbed. Then he passed my file over to a Dr D. Sholl and
that was the last I saw of the psychiatrist. However, I was detained on
that ward for 3 weeks, whereby had to look at the staff that debased me
and I was denied a second opinion. Those doctors and nurses crushed my
sole and emotionally scarred me for life.
On the 2/9/96, they released me from Heatherton hospital on a Community
Treatment Order. Three weeks later the Mental Health Review Board took me
off the Community Treatment Order, because I didn’t meet all the criteria
required to detain a person as an involuntary patient under the Mental
Health Act.
I’ve spent years writing complaints to the Health Services
Commissioner, Department of Human Services and the Health Minister, but
they tried to fob me off claiming the abuse I received was appropriate
care and treatment. What’s more, lawyers won’t do anything about this
because they claim psychiatric patients aren’t worth fighting for; even
though the new Chief Psychiatrist acknowledged in a letter dated the
23-6-03, that some aspects of my treatment were illegal.
Its no wonder the Victorian Suicide Prevention Task Force found that
90% of suicides were committed by people who had undergone some form of
Psychotherapy and most of them had been in psychiatric hospitals.
hey man im feeling a little bit fuckt up at the minute will some one
please talk to me a need a net frend e-mail me at jnomlly@aol.com tanx
well fuck you all if no fukers gona talk to me no wonder some ov you are
suicidle your all ignerant fucks!!!!!!!!!
well fuck you all if no fukers gona talk to me no wonder some ov you are
suicidle your all ignerant fucks!!!!!!!!!
well fuck you all if no fukers gona talk to me no wonder some ov you are
suicidle your all ignerant fucks!!!!!!!!!
well fuck you all if no fukers gona talk to me no wonder some ov you are
suicidle your all ignerant fucks!!!!!!!!!
Hey boa....chill whats up with ya the day then.....email me on
lynngamble23@hotmail.com
dont do anything silly because u will only hurt the loved ones around u,
trust me, i know!
Hi my name is Cathy, I am a junior at a High Shcool in Washington State. I
am doing a junior research project, and it was on Teen Suicide. I know
alot about teen suicide and i took anti depressants for a long time. I
almost believe that those pills are something you get addicted to and they
make you think that they help. But i Don't think they do. Good luck to all
of you
Well well there has been alot of posts while we have been away. and to
that austrialian sex mental ward thing, we want proof. show us pictures
because we dont belive you unless you are really not cool and mature and
you got done by many men in that room. so yea. PICTURES
were back lucy. your a whore
sum ppl r cool in here others r sad ......but it takes all sorts 2 make a
world rite? but hey u ppl dat wanna end it all ........think b4 u do coz
it does get beta trust me i know, ive been there many times an it neva
goes away, u just hav 2 go wit it an take it 1 day at a time.
email me if you want to talk
sireslut@hotmail.com
Are you sure that this is what you want have you thought about others? You
family, friends, the guys @ work? You matter evryone does and never think
that you don't. I would like to help you but I probably aren't that
capable but there is someone who is. 'O LORD U HAV SERCHD ME N U NO ME, U
NO WEN I SIT N WEN I RISE, U PERSEVE MY THOUGHTS FRM AFAR, U DERSERN MY
GOIN OUT N MY LYIN DWN, UR FAMILIAR WIV ALL MY WAYS, B4 A WORD IS ON MY
TONGUE U NO IT COMPLETELY O LORD U HEM ME IN BEHIND N B4 U HAV LAID UR
HAND UPON ME SUCH KNOWLEDGE IS 2 WONDERFUL 4 ME, 2 LOFTY 4 ME 2 ATTAIN,
WHERE CAN I GO 4 UR SPIRIT WHERE CAN I FLEE FRM UR PRESENCE? IF I GO UP 2
THE HEAVENS UR THERE, IF I MAKE MY BED IN THE DEPTHS UR THERE IF I RISE ON
THE WINGS OF THE DAWN, IF I SETTLE ON THE FAR SIDE OF THE SEA, EVEN THERE
UR HAND WILL GIDE ME, UR RITE HAND WILL HOLD ME FAST. PSALM 139' You have
been given your body from God respect and love it. God loves u like mad
guys. Never think your going thruogh life alone coz God is here 2 support
u n guide the way. Have faith guys and have strngth. In christ u cn do all
things! Good luck and love frm 2 christian gals tryn 2 make a difference 4
our Lord and saviour.
What the hell? someone in here writing a book or what? if anyone was
treated like that, the place would be shut down, that was nonsence. And
hell yes, any lawyer would love a case like that, whoever you are, you
should become a writer.
The lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in
green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his
name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear
no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they confort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou
annointest my head with oil: my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I
will dwell in the house of the lord for ever. Amen!!!!!!!!!!
Angel of love
our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy
will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day, our daily bread.
Forgive us our trespassess, as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory forever.
Amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me
Fucking Christians have no fucking idea there is no god and humans are
ffucked. I cant wait to die so that I can get out of this fucking sick
world full of bullshit lies and evil people
hi people, sorry to just join in the middle of this board but hey, i spose
thats wot they r for! n e ways has n e here actually tried to kill
themselves? its the shittest feelin in the world, when you go that far!
but you cant stop it! im just wanting to talk to someone who is/has been
in the same situation!
xx
oh and reading through some of the stuff written, also believe there is
no god! no way can "god" exist!!
u lot r kinda weird, wats the point of u being on here to get help from
others that feel the same wen all u r gona do is slag them off and wat
they beleive in!
get a grip!
I shared a part of my life with you and you respond by mocking the hell I
went through. How would you feel (were back), if I asked you for photos of
someone physically and sexually abusing you? If you read my statement, you
would know that I wasn’t in a position to take photos for your enjoyment.
However, I do have my medical file and it contains evidence of the abuse
they subjected me to.
Every day of my life I struggle to go on, because I want them held
accountable for the evil things they did to me and (whether you believe me
or not) this abuse happens frequently in our so-called civilized society.
Consequently, I have been fighting for justice for over seven years, given
that I had always believed we lived in a society whereby the law protected
us. Now I know better. Though, I’m sorry if you think I’m lying, because
I'm not.
I wrote my story down for a couple of reasons. The first is: I hope you
all learn to stop putting your faith in doctors, because they receive huge
incentives from the drug companies to put people like you on psychotropic
drugs and as my story shows, they care more about these incentives than
they do about you. The second reason I placed my story here is that: I
haven’t been able to get closure through the legal system, so I started
writing a book to expose them for what they did to me (I hope this pleases
you dazed and confused). However, each day is a tremendous struggle for me
to go on existing in this world and I constantly experience an
overwhelming fear that I will terminate my existence before I finish the
book.
All the places and people I mentioned are real and they destroyed my
sole. I have suffered every day for more than 7 years, because of what
they did to me. Yet, they have never suffered as they have never been held
accountable for what they did, because the law doesn’t protect people who
end up in psychiatric hospitals (or at least it wont protect them in
Australia). Thus, the only thing I can do is expose them and that’s why I
named so many of them.
When I die, I want people to know that those doctors and nurses killed
me. They murdered me in 1996 when they committed those evil acts upon me
and destroyed my sole. My mind is not capable of thinking up such vileness
and it’s beyond my comprehension as to why people behave like that.
Perhaps this is the reason I can’t deal with it.
Hopefully you can now see that the incident I shared with you did
occur. But if you still feel sceptical, then type psychiatric abuse on the
Internet search and a number of websites that expose psychiatric abuse
will appear. If you continue to disbelieve me, then don’t read my book (if
it ever gets finished), as my story only gets worse. However, I would like
to point out that the secret to understanding human behaviour is to watch
and listen as people view others the way they view themselves. In other
words if you just go around accusing people of lying, it’s usually because
you are the one who frequently tells lies.
For those of you who dont know what I'm talking about, please refer to my
posting on the 5 Dec 03 and the coments that followed.
I question our so called human nature every day and constantly need
reasurance that there are some good people left in this world, so please
don't insult me again, becaue I havent insulted you.
Reveal the truth, I'm sorry if those things really happened to you,
sincerely sorry. I thought you was just someone in here messing around, as
if you read all the post, you see that people some what like to do that in
here. I did not ask to see any pictures, I am not mentally ill, or
disturbed, and I do not get off on photos like that.
And again, I would like to give you my deepest apologies.
I thought maybe, one of these jokers, was writing something maybe they
read out a book.
I hope you win your case over this, and I hope those people pay for what
they have done for you.
No one deserves to go through pain and suffering.
I don't understand the world and all the evil in it, I don't understand
why people do what they do.
Why would anyone want to rape or molest a young child, take away their
dignity and pride, make them scared of the world, and make them grow up
believing that this is how the world should be.
I also don't understand, how anyone can break into someone's home, rape
them, torture them, and leave them for dead, or even kill them.
I don't understand how anyone can harm people the way they do, why are
people so messed up.
These kids come in here and tell people they have no right to be
depressed, and they have no right to want to die. But hey, since you feel
this way, go ahead and do it.
Some people are depressed for small reasons and some are depressed for big
reasons, whatever the reason is, they still deserve to live.
God gave everyone life, he gave us a choice, him or hell.
He is not letting all this happen on earth, all the eveil around is, and
the sick people that don't want to believe, they resort to evil beyound
our control.
God gave us life, he didn't say he was going to control us like robots,
I'm not saying that all people that don't believe are evil, because
they're not.
But the people that do bad to the world, they aparently believe in
something other than God.
It's our choice to believe what we believe, and to live how we live, and
to do what we do.
But just because of all the bad, doesn't mean there isn't a God, because
he gave us our lives to do what we want, he didn't promise to play us like
a game. I'm sure God weeps when he looks down and sees how his children
are acting.
Open the door and God will show us the way.
Wandering in darkness grope,
Finding not a glimpse of hope.
Fingers touch to find my way,
Each foot fall, my heart betrays,
the fear which drives me through the day.
Suddenly the ground is lost,
Flailing arms as body's tossed.
Splashing down in crimson pool,
The warm embrace is much too cruel,
I curse this lowly, wretched fool.
Floundering in this self made hell,
Warmth increasing as I dwell.
within the confines I create,
Screaming as myself berate,
Giving in to this, my fate.
Eternity
By Marilyn
I stumbled on this surfing the web.
PRECIOUS
I have to totally agree, I believe that if you put your hands in Gods's
hands, then your mind will be lift from all the despair you feel. Open
your hearts and soul to your maker, and maybe your lifes will feel more
worth living.
I have seen many people completely change, after giving their sould to
God, I've seen people pull theirselves out of the deepest slumps, and was
able to hold their heads high. They no longer felt their lifes was
useless.
I'm sorry if you don't believe, but the truth is the answer, and God is
the truth, he is the answer.
If you don't believe, then read your bible, tell me how it could be right,
about everything it says is gonna happen. How could history have been so
predictable, if God hisself didn't give us the answers.
You think your lives are worthless, and you don't want to live them
anymore. Well, go to church, give God a chance. Believing in him has to
better than burning forever in hell, God gave you life, he made you, he
gave his only son to you, his son, Jesus, he died on a cross for you. What
more could he have done?
Don't turn your back on the world God gave you, look at it in the light
God wants you to see it in, show him, that all he gave you was well worth
it.
Only you can make that change, God will lead you the way, he will be with
you all the time, he will hold you in your desperate times.
God is the answer, God is the light, God is the way.
He's not going to answer your prayers, if all you do is ask, you have to
give to receive, if your greedy, and all you do is ask, then this is the
reason God hasn't answered.
It isn't because he doesn't care, because he does, he jsut wants your love
in return, he wants you to be born in his blood, he wants you to rejoice
in his name, and stand and be tall, and tell the world how much you love
God, preach the gospel. Not ask, and get angry, all because you only want,
and you he doesn't give, because you won't give.
Open your eyes, the answer is right there.
It's the sky, the grass, the water, the trees, the children, the animals,
the flowers, the air we breath.
All of these things are of God, he gave these to us, he's in them.
Give him something, show him your life is important, share it with him.
IF YOU REALLY WANT TO KILL YOURSELF, WHY BOTHER TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT IT,
JUST GET ON WITH IT AND DO YOURSELF A FAVOUR END THE MISERY AND PAIN.DONT
CRY FOR HELP, GET THE JOB DONE..........
have you ever tried to kill yourself? its not as easy as saying "just do
it"!!!!!!!! your fucking naive if you think that it is, and even before
you do find a way of doing it effectively you've got to get over the guilt
of doing it and hurting maybe that one person who possibly cares. or the
one person you do love. if it was so easy believe me i think most people
who want to wouldve done it by now! so fucking think before you write shit
like that!
hiya its me again i feel even crapper 2day i have a bad cough a cold im
even fatter even uglier and i cant take the way i am i h8 life
sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much i just want 2 die. I no itz
like im goin on but it feels like every1 looks at me weirdly like i am sum
fucked up fing dat went rong i h8 it so if ne1 has ne good ways of killing
demselves plz tell me.
hi every1 i woz just readin bout god loving every1 but fink about it he
aint exactly there 4 the poor little kids dyin of aids in africa or ne1in
africa 4 that matter and how can he b when he makes sum ppl so perfect and
ovas like me ugly and shit maybe he just wants us 2 feel like this i dont
no wot i beleive but i dont no how 2 at the moment when u see documentrys
on kids dyin on streets and so on so u tell me wot am i supposed 2 beleive
hey feeling pretty alone was wondering if anyone wanted a chat. living in
the uk and unsure what to do dont wanw burden my family and boyfriend with
my constant unhappiness cant stop thinking theyd be better off without me
my brother took his own life a few months ago and I was actually envious
of him cause I wanted to do it first. I really hate my self and every
thing about me. now i feel like if i do it everyone will think that there
is something wrong with the rest of my family. i just want to die.
You guys make me laugh. i havent been on lately so i couldnt reply to your
replys you sent so here they are for you now.
1. from that guy with the
abusing photos. you asked how i feel if someone asked me for those photos
heres your answer: Kinda kinky.
2.All those godly people apprently if you commit suicide you go to hell
so your all fucked.
ANd generlally you all suck blah blah blah 'cynical comment' blah blah
blah 'something that makes me sound intelligent' blah blah blah 'look at
me im so cool' blah blah blerg.
Hmmmm, i cant really be botherd with all your petty causes. youve kinda
sucked all the fun out of this. i hope your happy. bye bye now
love from everyone who helped take the piss out of you lot. HA beat you
to it. lets see what you say to this
TWAT!! thats all i hav to say to that.
Now thats a response.... :D
i feel really ill 2day and look even worse. i h8 my life
please dont h8 urself, u might think u r all fat and ugly and every one
looks at u in a different way but they dont. i know how u feel. i am 14
and i weigh a lot more than i should, i woz dead depressed coz i cudnt go
out and do stuff that my m8s did. i started cutting myself but it didnt do
anything. i slit my wrists in the bath and bled all over the floor, i dont
know why i didn't die, luck i ges. i woz takin to hospital and they gave
me that shitty talk. i h8d them for saving me. after i got outa hospital,
i went out with my m8s and did stuff that they did. it woz great. i aint
so unhappy but i still think about killing myself. its not something i
wanna think about but i know i cant help it. pls dont end up like me.
and to that little f.ucker who pissed u all about, go get a life, wot
kinda person fannys about on suicide sites?? obviously noone else to talk
to. wanker.
bye
Hi all
Just to say i am back around after a break. I am here if any one wants
to chat about anything I wont judge you,
my m s n is here4u55@hotmail.com
add me if ya want
sean
I think those people who come into this room just to hang crap on thouse
of u that are hurting, have a serious psychological problem and they just
don"t know how to open up like the rest of u. The only thing u can do is
pity them, because they havent devloped the confidence or capacity to
express their pain any othe way. As for the brave ones who have opened up
I think u are all wonderful gifted people and I want to thank u for giving
others the opportunity to try and understand the depths of your emotional
pain.
Unfortunatly their have been some Christians come in here to push their
beliefs on to u in a condeming way, I dont know what bible they read but I
can assure u that Jesus felt pain and he even cried; it says so in the
bible. What's more never condemed people for feeling emotional pain,
infact he wanted to heal their suffering. So perhaps some of u Christians
should read the bible again instead of throwing your weight around in the
name of the Lord. I hope he forgives you for judging these people as
though you were God. Next time u christians decide to play judge and jury,
don't do it in Gods name because he has more compassion than you ever
will.
Don't get me wrong, some of the christians have been very loving and u
deserve a big thanks for your efforts and also for the respect u have
shown to these people.
I wish that I could erase all your pain and suffering, but I can't. So
instead I will tell u againg that I think u are all wonderful, gifted,
beautiful people and I hope things improve for you.
I think those people who come into this room just to hang crap on thouse
of u that are hurting, have a serious psychological problem and they just
don"t know how to open up like the rest of u. The only thing u can do is
pity them, because they havent devloped the confidence or capacity to
express their pain any othe way. As for the brave ones who have opened up
I think u are all wonderful gifted people and I want to thank u for giving
others the opportunity to try and understand the depths of your emotional
pain.
Unfortunatly their have been some Christians come in here to push their
beliefs on to u in a condeming way, I dont know what bible they read but I
can assure u that Jesus felt pain and he even cried; it says so in the
bible. What's more never condemed people for feeling emotional pain,
infact he wanted to heal their suffering. So perhaps some of u Christians
should read the bible again instead of throwing your weight around in the
name of the Lord. I hope he forgives you for judging these people as
though you were God. Next time u christians decide to play judge and jury,
don't do it in Gods name because he has more compassion than you ever
will.
Don't get me wrong, some of the christians have been very loving and u
deserve a big thanks for your efforts and also for the respect u have
shown to these people.
I wish that I could erase all your pain and suffering, but I can't. So
instead I will tell u againg that I think u are all wonderful, gifted,
beautiful people and I hope things improve for you.
awww jade u r soooooo cool hun an obviously been through a lot .......not
lol but hey if u get ur kicks on here go 4 it hun
jade u crack me up hun .......get a life baby im sure u wud feel beta
......or beta still go shag a christian like cliffy boy lol joker go shag
ur mom or papa lol
hiya itz me again i feel shit look shit and a girl hu is good enough 2
look like a modal said she woz ugly i h8 that neway i want 2 die i h8 life
so sum1 plz help me.
What is the point of killing urself if u could just go out and make
something of ur life to make u feel better???
this has ta b said(your all funny) but ur completley full of mad dogs
shit.........have ya not got a life for fuck sake, oviously not if ur on
here writing shit....get a life u loser.....ur the one that we are
laughing at think about it ya asshole....
You lot are really taking this seriously arnt you.
Lighten up.
Big smiles now
if anyone wants to talk i am here to listen. my msn is
dirtbag1234@hotmail.com
hey lucy, dont kill yourself. everyone out ther tokin a loada shit and
they suck ass. go kick them where it hurts real bad. wankers. can i ask,
if u did kill yourself, are u sure it would work??? there are so many
things tat could go wrong. u cood end up paralysed and then ur life wood
be even worse and u coodnt do anything about it. think about it. is ur
life really that bad??? lots of love... mistaken
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
dazed and confused, thanks for the message on the 6-12-03. I love the
prayer you wrote, it was really beautiful.
P.S. I know you wern't the one asking for photoes, thet was someone who
called themself were back.
i am gonna kill myself on xmas day. life is too hard. im 16 and everyone
fucks me about like i am a kid. ill wake up really early and kill myself
in the bath, tat means my mum finds me first. sorry mum. love cassy
could really use a friend
sireslut@hotmail.com
buba, I believe u must have been an incest victom and I think u are the
one who writes all the other nasty comment on this board because u don't
have anyone in this world to talk to. Whats more I recon u write all the
messages from Lucy, yes I think u are one sad person and u alone write all
those horrible things; maybe its because u are a woman traped in a mans
body. They can give u a sex change if u want, it might help. But it won't
erase your sad childhood memories of being raped by you'r parents.
Cassy you are relly fucked up i mean yeah i know how you feel but its not
your mums fault is it why would you do that to her if you luv her
sorry if that were mean but don't ya know your not the only one who feels
like it i mean i am 15 but i would never do that i mean like it is really
wrong and i think you shouldn't try and have a merry christmas and don't
kill your self
Cassy i think u should really talk to an adult, someone u really trust,
talk to them about ur problems once u start talking everything will start
to work out. I feel the same way u do but i talked to my mum and things
started to get better. It wont get better over night but it will help u!
Please talk to someone for ur own sake!
It appears that nobody in here likes me anymore? Am I correct?
YEAH! WELL FUCK ALL OF YOU!
Ok, well, nobody likes me in here. I came in here to chat and not be
abused like I always am... But guess what, you lot all suck!
Mike, lots of people have put their e-mail address up on this boad saying
that they are happy to talk to anyone. So you should try and contact them
if u want to talk to people, instead of getting angry. You wont make
friends by abusing people, so try and be polite if u want them to reply to
you.
lisa, try a romance room or some dating room if u feel that way,instead of
asuicide chat room. Your problem isnt listed in the DSM.
Does anyone know of a suicide chat room where u can actually talk to other
people openly about it.
i do................on here i think that this place is the only place i
can acctualy talk openly about how i feel and shit! its wicked
i do................on here i think that this place is the only place i
can acctualy talk openly about how i feel and shit! its wicked
Do non suicidals know what its like yo be suicidal ? I think not. Suicide
is murder, It is pre meditated. Any idea what it is like to feel really
murderous. I have just taken all the tablets I can find and downed them
with red wine. This is a feeling past anti depresants, I want to die
because i fear for myself and others. If this is life then I do not want
to know, i am a quarter through and it hurts like nothing before. I hurt
so much everyday it makes me cry, I am jealous of happy people and and the
envy is enough. I dont blame them I just hate myself. I am of no use to
this planet no matter what anyone says. Charity starts at home, love
yourself before you love others, I cant and until I see different I have
to find out that me being dead is better than me wanting to DIE everyday.
I love some people but I cannot do this any longer. I hope anyone who
reads who can love themselves does and that they dont do anything stupid,
i know your pain and it is worse then anything in the world.
If you go to http://www.lurid.org/chat/phpMyChat.php3
you will be in a live suicide room where u can talk about your feelings.
help me please! i want to die and i tried to the other night but failed, i
still want to try again though. i cry every day, i hate my self more than
anything in this world. i feel like im drowning in my own self nauseating
pity and i dont want to do it any more.
Hiya all sowwy i have not been on in a while.......
has any one hurd from Faith.......?
i havent seen her around home and i am getting worried....!
From Kay
hey ppl i have fort of suicide b4 but it aint worfit belive me!
I've just been looking at some of the things that have been said. I just
wanted to say that everyone in life has a problem and there are lots of
different ways to handle them. the main one i think is to meet your
problems head on if you cant do it on your own then there is a friend that
will help you. No matter what dont try to take away your life it is so
precius. If you have had someone close to you die then you should think to
your slef what they would have wanted you to do while they where still
alive. They dont want you to end your life because theres as they would
want you to live your life and theres to. I went threw all the motions of
wanting to kill myself when i lost my parents to brothers and 2 sisters
all in a house fire i could nver understand why i was the only one who
servived why couldnt everyone else and i tryed to commit suicide 7 times.
Then i started to think about what they would be doing if they where still
here i thought about all of there ambitions. I decided to live my life and
live theres to all of there ambitions that they had i now live them out
i've done sky diving ( and i really hate hights) and i acted in a play (ok
not a major play and not a major part but thats what my sister wanted to
do) so you see if you have lost someone then they dont always want you to
go and meet them in the after life they would have wanted you to do waht
they would hav been doing. Please everyone take care a think of what your
loved ones would have really wanted xxx
For the personwho put down the Christians, maybe I'm wrong, but I didn't
read any messages were the christians was putting these people down, they
just think that God will help, they didn't say anything bad about these
people. They did say something bad about the jokers in here aggravating
these people. I think you need to read the postings again.
If you don't believe in God, than that's your choice.
No one can make you, but it might be a way to go.
All you jokers in here telling these people that they have no life because
they're in here wasting their time, well what about you? Your in here
wasting your time, you apparently have no lifes, your in here picking on
people with problems, people you don't even know. What makes you any
better than these people? Nothing, your all the same, (flesh, blood and
bones), you are no better nor are you perfect.
You should be offering to help people in need, not spend your time trying
to trash everyone, what if you was in their shoes?
I'm not suicidal, but I know people who are, they need love and support,
not jokers telling them to do it.
Why don't you find a place to go for children your age?
I'm here on my computer, just wondering about the world.
Who knows why things are the way they are? Who knows where the love is?
Who knows right from wrong?
Why are the little children hungry?, why are they without food?, Why are
they without clothes? why are they without shelters? why are they beaten,
raped and abused? Why are they yelled at? called names and used? Why
aren't they happy?
Why do men like to beat their wives? Why do they like
to make them feel like shit? put them down and accuse? Why aren't they
loved?
Why do women feel like they need to be with every man they come to , to
feel wanted? Why do they sale their body's for a living? why is it so hard
for them to live in this world, without having to resort to the
unthinkable? Shouldn't life be better than that? why is life the way it
is.
Why do people kill, rob and steal?, why do they rape, torture and harm
people?
Why do people have to live on the steets? why do they go without food?
why don't they have clothes on their backs? and shoes on their feet?
why do children, make fun other children?, put them down, push them
around and make them feel worthless?
why do parents beat and abuse their children?, cuss them out and call
them names?
why is the world the way it is?
who knows? who understands?
No wonder people feel like this, no one wonder feel their lives are
worth living, who knows what might have happened to them? not me, I'm not
going to judge, I don't understand th ebad in the world.
I see the world, it's a cold cruel place, it scares me alot, I wish it
could be better.
Well guess what people.. I've been suicidal since April of 1995 and have
had major depression as far back as i can fucking remember so for that
dork that said get a hobby and take a freakin pill.. I've been on every
pill known to mankind since I was 17 and now I'm almost 33 and this is
driving me crazy, especially during this time of the year so unless you
know what you are talking about then do the rest of us a favor and shut
the fuc* up.
I know what you all mean, I see how awful the world is, I don't understand
it either. Some people really have it worst than the others, take a look
around, there's things in this world that aren't fare, things that seem
immaginable, think that are so cruel. Think about the little children that
have nothing, think about the people form the places were things dodn't
come so easy as it does here. I know we have it hard, but there's people
out there that have it worst.
I hope you all get the help you need, I hate the fact that anyone feels
their life is worthless, killing yourself is not the way to get help.
That the end for you here, that doesn't do anything but hurt thr ones that
love you.
Some people that feel their lives are worthless, they find ways to help
people worst off than them, then most realize, that their lives never was
that bad.
It also made them feel better to help, it made them feel needed, It's
almost Christmas time, some children won't even get a gift, find a child
that needs help, and send them a gift, a winter coat, gloves, socks,
whatever you may help with.
Then look at the smile on that childs face, then you'll see what a
difference you can make, something bad has happened in your life to make
you feel this way. Try to help the children who need it, try to keep them
from growing up and feeling the way you do. Be a role model, show them
life can be better. Nothing is so heart warming, than seeing the smile,
the bright eyes and the glowing face of a child.
Your an adult, at least most are, you have the power to change your lives
and make them better, but these young children, they have no power to do
anything.
Give a hand, that will start a change in your life.
Taz
Someone once told me that someone who wants to die is a selfish person,
one who cannot make it through life on their own, life is hard, life can
be shit, but it will and does get better. No matter how low your feeling
you can get through it. I tried to kill myself 3 times up to now, by
various means, but I somehow always survived. The last time i cut my
wrists and took 25+ painkillers downed with a bottle of vodka, I spent 4
weeks in hospital but I am still here, and I thank god every day that I
survived. Its still a struggle and a nightmare almost every day but I have
to keep on or all those doctors and nurses that saved me will have have a
wasted job. If I can do I know you can people. I'll be posting again soon.
Take care ppl. Im from the UK, if any one wants to talk about anything
then post me a message.
u lot r all fukin crazy nobs u need to get a life.im mates with justin in
school havin a laugh at all u tits! so here it is merry xmas everybodys
havin fun look to the future now weve only just beguuuuuuun!
c u in hell!
Hi people, all u who r feeling low, dont worry it will get better, there
is light at the end of the tunnel. Ne one wana talk bout dieing, im here
to listen, anything kinky then give me a shout coz im into everything.
laters ppl.
Life is tough, I know, I'm living one. But keep your heads high, and don't
give up.
Well ha ha, if we need to get a life, then maybe you and Justin do to,
because you all keep coming in here and wasting your time, apparently you
are some awful boring people that no one wants to spend time with, because
you all are all the time in here, putting down people you don't even know.
So telling us we need to get a life, what does that say for yourselves?
You all need a life as bad as we do.
Too all the people, I know you need strength, I also know things tend to
get worst during the winter and holiday seasons, please, just try to hang
in there, it's worth it. I hope you will soon see it.
Take care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!\
And keep your heads high.
You'll all be in my prayers.
Nina! What the fuck! I look fuckin nothing like Richey Edwards you idiot!
Anyway, fuck it. Im outa here, you fuckers aint gona speak to me again. Im
fuckin gone fuck face! Inabitch, assholes! And one more thing... That was
ME! Not fuckin Richey Edwards... I did a goodle search for Richey Edwards
and look fuckin nothing like uim NINA! Bitch, fuck all ya! Fuck it
assholes, Bye!
For gods sake all of you need to stop being so self righteous... You know
life is a gift so many people have terminal illnesses and all u can do is
moan about the fact your alive? wake up u ignorent fools, this is a
gift... use the fact you live to be happy not pretend this world is all
bad... because its not we have all been through shit, and if you think
like this you will not ever truly live... Peace xXx
Guess what electic manner!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Depression is an illness also, sometimes people are depressed because of
chemical embalances in their brains, some people are not always depressed
because of the way their lives are.
Why don't you stop being self righteous, and try to help these people,
instead id criticizing. These people need help, not told shit.
Ok, we all go through shit, not everyone goes to terribly bad shit, some
people experience more than others, ok. I wish people would stop saying we
all go through bad shit, because you do not know what kind of shit that
anyone else goes through, all experience can't be shook off, just by
saying " Oh well, we all go through shit".
Why don't people just stop telling people how they think they should feel,
and actually try helping them see their lives can be better.
Just because someone feels depressed enough to kill theirselves, doesn't
mean theyare self righteous, it means they need help. Because there is
something wrong, depression is an illness, something in your head fucks
up, you can't think right, it's not something you plan, or can you
control.
I'm sure people decide to feel suicidal, just for the joy of it, I'm sure
they want to end their lives, only so they can show off. These people need
help!!!!
Suicidal people need to be shown, they need to be talked to, they need
support.
Yes their is people that have terminal illnesses, it's not the suicidal
people's faults, just like it isn't their faults that they feel the way
they do, I feel bad for all ill people.
I wish I could do more for everyone, I wish I knew the cures, but I don't,
I can try to help in ways that only I can.
Everyone knows, this is true, when you feel this way, it's because your
head isn't the way it should, you are messed up, no matter how bad that
sounds, it is true. And you need to seek profressional and family help,
you need to straighten out the problem.
This will not go away by itself, sometimes this can make you go completely
crazy, sometimes you no longer want to just hurt yourself, but you want to
harm other people too, please find the help you need, because this stuff
is seriously, it's not a joke, or a laughing matter. I't isn't something
people should make fun of you over either, you need help.
Don't wait until it's too late.
Because your lives and other people's lives are at hand, and these things
are precious, cherish them as long as possible.
I wish you the
world!!!!!!!!!!
I read through all of your comments and i think we live with the most
selfish people in this world. While good people die daily because they are
alone or scared of the way their life will turn out, people get their
kicks by trying to push people off the edge. There is alot more to live
for then what you think. If you hold a leaf right up to your face, It will
seem huge. You won't be able to see anything else. just like your
problems. If you step back and really look at the picture, sure your
problems are still big but you can now see a solution. If you are thinking
that by taking you life it will all end everything and everying will be
rosy im sorry but you are wrong. God gave you life, He breathed in you and
you were born and then you take a gun to your head or razor to your wrist
you will wake up with God your wrong. God made you in reflection of him.
And again to those are thinking of ending your life, you get of this site
for a last hope so you type in you need help and some selfish uneducated
idiot gets on and tells you to do it, dont listen to them. If they want to
kill people with their words then prove that they cant by ignoring them.
Call someone and tell them your problems. It does help to hear a kind
voice on the phone or see a kind face. To the people that are telling them
how to kill themselves or telling them to shut up and go on with it, who
in the world made you the god of another persons life. you dont have to
get on this website. If you were hoping that this was a chat room and as
you see its not i will tell you really simple what to do do you see that
little address window up there on top good click it and type in a address
for a chat room. wow even your simple little minds can grasp that can't
you? And if anyone gets mad and write something about my mom that doesn't
bother me one little tiny bit because you have no idea where i live, or
where she lives. And If you talk about God then He will deal with you. One
last thing to the person who made this website. Thank you so much for
being a caring person. Even if you made it so people can talk about
another website and it turned out like this you dont know who all you have
helped. Thanks again Gods_sweet_lil_angel01@hotmail.com If you want to
email to talk i can get you connected to some people that can help
Thanks Zoey for not being one of those people that try to shove people off
the edge. Your one of the few gods_sweet_lil_angel01@hotmail.com
Hi, i doubt any of you remember me, yes i'm still alive.... I have noticed
Debbie and one or two others arent posting here nomore, Hope you're all
well and good.
even tho it was only a few months ago i was loosin my head again and
started reading/posting to this group to ease my suffering. Jade is right,
fuck the ones that have it so well that they can find the time to come
here and put down those who are suffering.
This is a lonely time of year people, for me too, i'm young-ish i hope i
dont have to go through life alone.
But there's many like us, with different problems,
I'd like to meet some of you and shit, this site was one reason i decided
to create the community written about below.
Christopher who is possibly the owner or modirator of this site, told me
to stop posting about my site untill i got the popups off n shit.
Well i'm posting it again, a fantastic community, to be shared with all of
you, many friends in there and it's not like your normal chat. it's web 3D
YES THE BROWSER DOWNLOAD LINK IS FIXED.
You only ned a 3d browser.
I started my world community again and moved it to my own site, so there's
no scary adds to put you off!!! plese come visit, i'll create you a
character.
http://www.etmdesign.com/vr/gs/world.html
It's still called gsworld
1oo's of virtual communities built by amazing people, just waiting to be
explored, does it sound intresting?
Well it's alot better than cribbin about killin yourself and will most
likely take ur mind off reality for a few hours, trust me... it's all
free.
http://www.etmdesign.com/vr/gs/world.html
So come on over peeps.
Merry christmas to all
hi is anyone there, there taking over my brain i wana die
there cuming to get me sum1 help me please i dont weana die there gonna
get my brain
Ive been waiting for a comment about me saying that I am a faker! And I am
a fucking faker, I had you cunts fooled for quite a while! Anyway... Its
time to create a new charactor for myself... You will never know if its me
or sombody else will you... Anyway, see you fuckers later!
Not cool Mike, lots of people have real problems and come here for advice
and support. Maybe you need a new hobby. :)
im bleeding... im going to die right now. i want you to know that its all
your fault... you guys have convinced me that i should die. life's not
worth living...ive killed my parents. i hear voices. my sister's dead. my
uncle killed himself too. i think this is the best thing to do. ive done
some sick, sick things in my life. and here it goes. nows the time. this
is my last message to the world. goodbye.
i lost my sister 2 days ago and iam a herion addict and have no1 to live
for any more some1 please help me and dont take the mick out of me i
really do need help
Chris,
I'm sorry to hear about your sister, have you considered going to a group
for support, and also maybe going and having yourself committed to get off
the heroin. They will only help you to stay safe while you are going
through withdraws. I hate to see anyone going through pain in their lifes,
it's gotta be worst this time of year.
Chris, do you have family that you can be around this time of year? and
you can spend time with?
Not being alone is one thing you need right now.
chris its your fucking fault your adictedto heroin.you got your self on it
get your self of it you sick fuck!!heroin adicts are 1 of the lowest forms
of people alive they need to be fucking shot.chris stop hurtin people that
care about you and just kill your weslf you fucking faggot.theres people
in here that need help not just another couple of quid to jack up with.you
piece of shit you deserve to die!!!!1
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
die die die die die die die die die die die die die die
death death death death death death death death
hahahahahahahahahahaahhaahhahahahahahahaha
Suicide isent the awnser you havent got only you 2 consider here wat about
your friends family surely they care. And are you sure youve got evrything
worked out are u sure the way your gona do this will work? If ure gona
hang yourself have u got the right sort of rope are you gona be able to
get in the right position for it not to hurt??
Killing yourself is not easy, im sure that y eva ur thinkin of doin this
can b sorted out ur not on your own if u need to chat go to my email
adress i have msn. Luv ema and rch
P.S JESUS LOVES YOU!
wayne does it make you feel good that you are so cold hearted? The lowest
form of human is not an addict wanting help, its the man that pushes him
to kill himself or slanders him for wanting help. Do you honestly think
you are better them him. To those who say then want help PLEASE EMAIL ME!
I WILL HELP YOU. If you come on this site to pronounce your death, is it
attention you want? A friend? Someone to talk to? Email me. I will Talk.
And as for wayne you need some help.
you dont no the 1st thing about my life.
but it was a fucking drug addict that made my 6 year old brother get
involved with drugs and he ended up killin himself HE WAS 6 FUCKING YEARS
OLD!!so yeah to me he is the lowest for of person and do you no what i
dont care how you people judge me fuckthe lot of ya
Wayne i am sorry for what happened to your brother, but you dont know the
1st thing about him. He might really want help. People turn to drugs as "a
way out" If he wants help you can turn your bad experence into helping
them get off of drugs so that situation won't happen to anyone else. Do
you think by driving him over the edge will bring your brother back to
you? Krista
I am eating soup right now hehe.
not happy i posted here yesterday n its now gone!!!!!
there was a girl, emma i think her name was!!! anyway she wanted to no how
many pill to take to try damage herself but not kill herself!!!!
emme if ur there please dont do that!!!!! my brother tried the same n
survived to but it makes all the poeple round him feel so alone!!!!!!
please please try talkin to ur family!! im very sorry if u have already
tried this!!! i really hope u feel better today
you all suck and need to get laid big time.you sad mother fuckers!!get a
fucking life,go out by some new clothes get laid have a drink and a smile
no what im saying.lifes to short.some people that love life have no choice
and end up dying really young then theres you pathetic losers that
actually wish this on yourselfs,well at least you say you do,i bet if th
chance was there you'd all pussy out any way.do you no
why..............coz if you wanted to die that much you'd go and fucking
do not come on here looking for attention.grow up the fucking lot of
ya.you people are lower than low.reading this shit is soo depressing it
makes me wanna come find you and kill the fucking lot of ya.my lifes
great!!you here that GREAT!!!read it and weep you sonofabitch's.next time
i come on here i wanna see positive comments ok about how much you all
love life and dont wanna die,apart from paki's and blacks they should all
be shot any way along with gays!!coz white white white is right kick um
out and fight fight fight......................oh yeah merry x-mas
I have never felt so alone.I really hate Christmas.Anyone out there feel
the same?
Hey listin people who don't get death or try to kill there self i am going
to say one thing if u have never tried then don't come in here commenting
on us saying we never did listin u lil fuckers they come in here and
comment on ur shit go to hell and just to let u know u have to know wht
the hell u are talking about before u fucking come in here and put lies
up!
hiya....... how is everyone today? im gd i think..... i am jsut annoyed
and depressed..... cos i really like this lad but i messed up by meeting
him one night totall pissed!! he really doesnt understand what i go
through i have sed i am sowie so many times but no he stil doesnt want to
know!! anyway have a gd xmas people!! love carley x x x x
methods .. .. any like fail-proof method§ ? mail me
I really don't know waht to say with out sounding dumd.....Yeah i am
depressed and want to die and most of my close friends know casue they see
the scars and see the poems on my wall, but i can't tell them everything
that bugs me so i guess i am jsut tryign to find someone to talk to...by
the way happy holiday to everyone
love me
im always here for u t talk to
amanda go fuck a dead donkey you scabby lil bitch
i need someone to talk to cant talk to my parents they dont understand .
my friend kiled herself in april and im going the same way i really need
help but dont know who to turn to i just feel as though i dontbelong
anywhere any more
Hi charlie, if you or anyone wants to talk about anything at all, then im
here, just drop me a email ppl. Take care x x x
alright peeps any one in here?
hey peeps, its ok 2 be scared ive been there done that it obiously dident
work! i understand da hurt and pain ur goin through and im here if u wona
chat jst drop me an email and il be there 4 u i will care even if no1 else
does be strong luv emma xxx
Hey,
it's that time again..feeling are well pretty strong. The bus was
not stoping as it usally does today..thought i waas gonna get my dream but
it was just a bad driver braking late. Im on MSN and AOl Im as
pjalchemist@aol.com if ya ever wana chat. I've my ideas laid out...think
iput em up here a few weeks back. recently single as the so called
''girlfriend'' can't be going out with or close or mates with osmeone who
wants to kill there self. Umm and shes also been there on that edge too. I
feel im finger tips for getrting what i want..i duno as i see nothing good
right now and no one there kidna thing. yeah yeah ya can sayi mcrying out
for help..yeah kina...someone to show me whats good about this terbale
place.
Duno if ya get me or not. See ya around or so
PJW x
hiya i am a real freak i h8 my life i just want 2 die and every1 looks at
me like i am a freak and treat me like one. i cant kill myself coz im 2
scared i just want 2 die all the time but i cant if there is a god he wont
let me so sum1 plz tell me wat 2 do.
plz
To the person who posted ahead of me, I'm not sure who you are, so I'll
call you plz, If God isn't letting you kill yourself, that is a good
thing.
I won't tell you what to do to kill yourself, but I will offer you support
for help, I'm here to talk to if you want that.
Today, is my baby's 6th birthday, I miss him alot, if you all read my
postings then you know I haven't seen my kids in a while, this Christmas
made a year, my husbands going to let me see my kids thursday, I'm giving
them their Christmas presents then, I know they'll be late.
I'll finally have the money to take him to court in about 2 months, that
helps me alot.
I had actually been feeling better, but this holiday season brought me
back to the same feelings I had before, maybe seeing my kids tuesday will
help bring me back out of it, I love them so much.
If you read the postings, then you know why I haven't seen my kids, no I
wasn't a alcoholic, or a druggy, I just ran from my abusive husband, He
was abusive to me, not my children, and I had no where to take 5 kids, so
I had to leave themwith him, now I have to take him to court to see them.
I know my life is worth living, but right now I'm a little blinded, it's
hard to see.
It's really hard right now, I just needed to get some of this stuff off my
chest, I haven't been in here for a while, because I was actually feeling
better.
Thank you all for listening.
Debbie
life is shit an i just wana die as quick as i can
Wayne,
You need someone to talk to? email me, I'll be on here a little
while longer.
Debbie
Anyone else need to talk, email me.
To the person I called PLZ, your life is worth living, you need to find
you some help, please don't kill yourself, you said God won't let you, I
thank him for that, he knows your life is precious, and you need to live
it.
If you need someone to talk to, email me, I will listen, because I too
need someone to talk to.
Debbie
Life is a gift even when it sucks ass and i know it does sometimes but
always remember your blessings even when you feel bad there is always
somebody else out there that has it worse. I know that sounds gay to
depressed people but understand what we all take for granted each day. God
loves you and always will.
whats the most painless way to kill yourself?
hi,iv read most of the comments,i think i mite b suicidal,im not sure, i
think about it a lot,im 19,im apparently really good looking,i dnt think
so.i get loads a girls interested but after a few weeks they run a mile,iv
had enough of em,not saying im gay!i feel so alone my mates r with
different girls every nite,im not the slag type but i wonder why no girls
like me.my mates dnt 2 respect me either,i can tell.it upsets me a lot.i
get 2 the point were i dont want 2 talk 2 ne1,i go 4 long walks every nite
on my own, m8s take the piss,maybe 1 day theyll c its not funny
nemore,when im gon.
i think if i killed myself id go abroad 2 do it,i wouldnt want my mum 2 c
me dead.i wouldnt want her 2 think it was her fault,truth is, a girl
called stacey i used 2 go out with, broke up with me,ages ago, but i still
love her loads. i cant get her outta my head.she ignores me now, i dont
know why.sum1 add me 2 msn,rm__1@ hotmail.com, theres 2 underscores __.i
would like 2 chat about it!thanx
i still h8 my life but i think i have worked sumthin out i no it may sound
stupid but i think that satan created me not 2 b evil but 2 laugh at coz
of the way i am and god wont let me go to heaven because he dident create
me and satan wont let me go to hell because he is having a great time
seein me cut myself and h8 the way i am.
by the way thanx 4 listening
Christopher, (the auther of the page),
could you please do me a favor, erase any info, that I might have put on
my posting, that people will know who I am? Where I talk about how many
kids I have? how long it's been since since I've seen them? and when I
said I was going to get to see them again? and any info that if someone
reads these that you think they might know who I am? please, also could
you remove my email addresses.
I'm sorry to ask you this, I know I've posted alot, but please, I would
appreciate it.
Here lately, everytime I get on here, especially the times I post on here,
someone hacks into my computer, I don't know if someone I know stumbled on
here and read my post, or if it's the kids that's been here playing, but
they're really screwing up my computer.
I wouldn't ask you to go through all this trouble, if it wasn't necasary,
I will be greatful.
Thank you,
Debbie
im 13, an oready, i feel like i have failed at everythin!! i am the odd 1
out in my family, my freinds are jus...fake.all any1 cares about is wot
they are thurt off as, popularity is evrythin. 4 me its a mask. am glad
that ppl are to shallow to look past retty faces an designer cloths, coz
then they mite b able 2 see me, rottting away, inside myself.
no 1 gives
me the time of day to get these thurts out of my hed, if i dnt soon...
plz chat 2 me,
beth*a
Anyone know of any live 24/7 suscide chat rooms? if so can post up the
address as i wana speak in realt time to opther...no offens to this place
tar 4 chattin, hope ev stayz calm a chilld widcha
xxx
Christopher (blog admin.),
I ask you to do me a favor, don't guess you will, I come in here because I
need help, I don't come in here so people can screw with my computer,
would you please remove the things I asked?
Your webpage really helps me relief stress, and coming in here takes me
away from the world, but having my computer fixed will cost to much money,
and I can't really afford, please help!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you,
Debbie --
I have no problem with editing your posts, but I'd like to
hear more info about people hacking into your machine. I would like to
think that this web site is not contributing to any security issues you're
having.
Please click my name below and email me directly. I'd like to hear more
about this.
Thanks.
i meet a close freind in a pych unit we wher great mates until the 15
october 2001 we both were there for suicide atempts ethan had already
tried twice i was shocked to see him there i had known him for years
anyway it all came to a end he left behind a lot of people his wife with
his baby who was due to give birth 2weeks after his death it has change my
outlook on a few things i still battle the temtation to end it all but i
will not give up the fight that easy anymore suicide hurts the people that
u leave behing big time anyway good luck
thats the only thing stoppin me. who id leave behinde... but there the 1z
hu have pushed me this far
xb
why is it that im gettin so much shit to go out tonite by my folks when
all a want to do is get wrecked on whisky by my self n think off past
girlfriends... dont they get that now more than ever im in pain?? Maybe
2nite that blade may cut 2 deep....
yo, phil ya there!!
chat 2 me, i am gettin wrecked an got the same thurts in my ed. jus not
bout the exz
chat 2 me if ya ere , plz
xxxxbethx
hay beth,soz wasnt there 4 u last nite.Decided it was perhaps best if i
went out in the end.think it helps sum times to b round people i can drink
with. here if u wanna chat. take carex
the weight of leaveing people behind seeme unfair italked about ethan
before but i am lucky to still be here myself it took the swat team to
stop me they shoot me twice with a taser gun it must mean something i hope
u are still here along with everybody on this line i know its hard and
considering what i have done in the past i dont qualify to be giving any
sort of andvice hang in there all the best
[post remove by site administrator]
Please keep it civil.
tk here again that last message was for shane who didnot leave a e mail
contact
thanx phil, hope u had a gud nite. i got a bit stupid afta writing that. i
ran away 2 my m8s they jus traced me dwn now. o well . i jus needed 2 b
away frm ery1, ya no.
xxbxx
t.kentwell
i havnt heard so much shit in my life
you talk bollocks mate and your a fuckin fake ass pussy ole mother
fucker!!!!!
i really dnt c the piont ny mur, i finially think i cud do it, its not a
matta of jus wanting 2 now. i really cud... like now, i haev been sneeking
a sheet of pills from the cupbord 4 a few punths now, i have got a bit of
a collection. i have waitedtill the day i felt this bad. but wot about my
mum an dad, even tho they have neva been there 2 listen , or love me, i
still cnt bear the thurt of them bein sad. wot am i sayin!!?? ..... hu sed
theyd b sad.
Hey people
how is eveyone
hi beth*a
if anyone wot to tlk here is my emailsmeegle_and_his_precious@hotmail.com
hey jonathon,
hope ya dont mind, i have tried 2 add u , but i dnt think it has worked
xbx
i only need a chat, i think
hay beth course ur mum n dad care about u. Rearly dont think u should take
those pills.prolly easy 4 me 2 say i no..
i didnt
as much as i really wanted 2, my mum thurt i shud 'get out 4 a bit' an
sent me out wid sum of my m8s, joy, NOT
xbx
where are u at shahe i would love to meet u ring me any time 0412605064 u
fuck
im a lier and a fake.i dont really give a shit about any 1 on here you all
pathetic!!!
Christopher,
I clicked on your name, and it took me to another webpage,
there was no email address there.
Was that a joke?
I had been having problems with people conttrolling what I do on my
computer, they take me to pages I don't want to go to, they download stuff
onto my computer, they send me emails, making jokes about my life.
My computer is getting filled up with junk that I'm not putting there, I
try to control my curser, and it goes where it wants, not where I try to
make it.
I took my computer to a person to find the problem, because my computer
keeps shutting down on me, for no reason.
The person said, the problems are from a hacker, no way of finding out
who, but since the problems started coming the same day as the emails, he
beleives it's the same person, he asked if I posted any info about myself,
the only place I posted even my email address is on your webpage.
Also, people have been using my email address to order CD's and other
things, I get emails from people thanking me for joining or ordering stuff
, the of course, they don't know my full name, so the whole name isn't
correct, but I can't find the addresses they give to receive the things,
because I don't know the passwords and account numbers they have.
Sorry this emails is all screwed up, but I have a migrain today, the
screen actually looks blurry to me.
The reasons I stated is the reason I believe it's one of these jokers
in here, or someone I know read my posts in here, and figured out it was
me, like I told you, I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important.
i understand i am new to computers ive just seen someone type in a mesage
saying they were me they dont have my email locaction shane still want to
here from u u made it personal now by pretenting to be me ring me mate im
dying to her from u i will find u
ive just left a message for shane he left a message saying a lot of shit
that was posted by me there was no email contact of mine in that message
im new to computers but i have freinds who kwow them inside out i will
find u shane and while im still her get off this site the people on this
site dont need to her u this moring ill find out how u sent thst message
pretendting to be me anyway to all the people out there who need to talk
keep doing it its hard but dont give up the fight no one else might
understand but the people on this site do dont give up good bye and all
the best
just listenin to randy travis songs!! luv them but why the hell isnt he
postin on this site??
guess that meens nowt to any1 though if uve neva herd any of his songs!!
well i have an hour 2 wait
i tryed the overdose and the jumping thing manny times in the past but i
got found 2 soon or it was'nt high enough 2 work
i got my hands on a shooter at last
only thing is that its a shotgun and it will make 2 much of a mess ...but
this way it will work
the first thing i have done right in my life
good bye all u people
theres nothing left 2 say .........
good bye good bye good bye
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU CLOWNS DOING??????? KILL YOURSELF?HOW DARE
YOU!!!!Look killing yourselves isnt doing anyone any good you can easily
yes i say it again EASILY get yourself out of whatever hole youre in and
the most important thing you need to remember is that GOD created you and
so its not for you to take life
she right. it isnt the answer. i've just found this site. look, have u
thought about it at all? ur family and friends will b
devastated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and a shotgun? Thats gonna hurt alot and it
mightnt work. i know i mightnt help but please listen to me! god has the
answer to everythin. he doesnt joke and killin urself isnt gonna make it
go away! u'll have hell to suffer 4 eternity instead!
i really envy the dead, wouldnt it just be great to have a "death buton"
if anyones noes any chatrooms plz let me no
not all of us are nice people , some of us are a big burden on others i
know i am .i hear from family (not friends as i have none) all the time u
r a wast of space ....leave me alone i got better things 2 do
if it was'nt 4 me my mum+dad might still b together and living in there
house ........plus my father would'nt of gone 2 prison
i was 2 blame 4 that and then some ...... ill keep on making others life
hell whille im hear
it might not b the same 4 every1 but now im close im getting confussed
about what i have left 2 do but i think its just 2 things left 2 do now
......stop my internet connection and send my goodbye emails better do
that now before its late
you go jane!!!!its true i mean what kind of thing is that to say?that you
want to kill yourself lifes great! if you feel that bad go to god and it
aint god bashin i mean take pills talk to someone find out why you feel
that way
shotgun its just right size and everything one end in me mouth pull the
trigger with my toes
ive have been taking pills (prozac , valium , zispin) been in and out
of hosip more times than i can remember i had 2 stay in a nut nut H for a
year about 3 years a go the last time i tryed
its not something i have through of doing on the spare of the momment
if thats what ur thinking , i ve been getting thing sorted 4 the past 2
months
had 2 get the car in a different name / the phone and the other bills ,
closed down me bank accounts , pay my credit cards off
dam it dont look good,im still waiting hear 4 my tool . i was glad that
2 night is the time 2 make others peoples life better by doing away with
myself...........now i cant even plan that right , i hope he gets hear
soon so i can pop out without any1 knowing 4 a day or 2
f ing hell ......... i must b the biggest losser in the world
he ant turning up now its 3 am he was ment 2 b hear @ 2 - 2:30 am
how useless can 1 person be
now i have 2 try 2 get through another night / day
why me its not fair i dont want 2 jump in front of a bus / lorry / train
.......that could hurt others
if i fill a barth up and put an electric lead in with me .....that could
cause the place 2 go up in a electric fire i just cant think anymore
ohhhhhhhhhh dear me..................
worthless waster has been watching channel 4.dont steal quotes from tv
programmes how fuckin lame is that
havin read tons of posts on here.....it seems as if theres alot of
you/people that are in need of help.....and alot of you just seem to want
to gain attention. instead of sitting in a chat room saying " i wanna
shoot myself" or similar why dont you seek proffesional help? or find a
friends to talk to instead of making comments like these "i feel so low i
need more pills".....?!?! to complete strangers.
I cant help but wonder if most of the people writing posts here are the
types of humans that would not help themselves?and relish languishing in
there own self pity and loathing?
I dont know but it does seem apparent that most posts on here are just
kids making something from nothing.
sorry if that upsets some of you.
Hettie u thick twat
if u look @ the time i posted about my feelings u
would know that i did'nt even watch what ever u r going on about
@ the twat that posted jan 3 / 10:45 pm
why dont u seek proffesional help u say ......if u got ur head out of
ur arse u would of noticed that i ( along with manny others ) have been
treated in various Hosipitials ..i have spent a total of 3 years in
various wards / class
WHAT GIVES U THE F ING RIGHT 2 THINK THAT SOME OF THE PEOPLE HEAR R
JUST KIDDING - HAVING A GIGGLE OR WHATEVER
HOW THE F**K WOULD U FEEL IF U KILLED UR WIFE AND LITTLE GIRL IN A CAR
CRASH WHEN IT WAS'NT UR FAULT ..U F**K HOW DARE U
HOW F***ING DARE YOU
U F**KING C**T U MAKE ME STRIVE 2 STAY ALIVE 4 ANOTHER DAY .....JUST SO
I COULD F**K UR LIFE UP THE SAME WAY THAT SOME OF THE PEOPLES LIFES ON
HEAR HAVE BEEN
HOW THE F**K DARE U COME ON HEAR AND SAY U THINK THIS PERSON OR THAT
PERSON IS NOT TELLING THE TRUTH
AND U ANT EVEN GOT THE BALLS 2 INCLUDE UR EMAIL ADDRESS
why i wonder ........maybe it cause some people like me might just know a
few online wiz kids that can find out where u r living doing a telenet
thing so i could come and F**k u up ............i ant got nothing 2 lose
not as if ill do time 4 it .........plus i have got off on ABH in the past
when my lawer brought it up that i am unstable
HOW THE F**k DARE U ALL 4 SAYING SHIT U KNOW NOTHING ABOUT
it is unbeleaveable that many a people can say that it is sumting u do to
get atention. i if wanted atention i would dance round half naked singing
but its not like that. this is the first time iv bin on this site and u
all make perfect sence and in a funny kind of way u also comfort me and
relax me.can some one please email me or add me to your msn mesenger i
need someone to tell things to plzplzplz
hi T r u still there? if u r can u email me. my email is
spunge_bob_sam_pants@hotmail.com plz do i need 2 tlk 2 some one no 1 is
here 4 me at the mo
THE ONES LEFT BEHIND
10 yrs ago , when i was just 15 my life was alterd , smashed and
broken.... i was going out with a boy age 18 and i got "fed up " with hin
, as you do at 15 !! .
I told him the relationship was over , he said he coud not live without me
.... whats that suppost to mean when you are 15?.. it means he will sulk
for a day or two maybe even a week but b 4 long he will be with another
girl.......BUT not HIM ... OHHHHH NOOOOO he went home and hung himself...i
guess he ment what he said!!!!.
I was left at 15 years old blameing myself for the shocking death of a
young man , after years and years of his family stalking me and shouting
out " murder" in the street , harrasing my family and friends i have come
to a conclusion ...IT WAS NOT MY FAULT .
I mean what the hell did he think he was doing ... he wanted attention ,
he wanted to be found IT WENT WRONG . He not only killed him self he
killed a part of me , his mum,dad,sisters,aunts,uncles...ect ect
I beg you .. from the other side of the coin please talk to someone its
not only your life you are trying to take away its like chucking a stone
in a pond its ripples foreva affecting people for years.
take care all xxx
Please will you send me some live chat room links.
i have been at both sides of the *suicide* coin so to speak and think i
might be of some help to others
Smile, it shows your alive.
hey guys look if any of you ever need someone to talk to im here. ive been
through my fair amount of shit to know how it feels. i tried alot to kill
myself and now im glad im alive. trust me losing your precious life over
things aint worth it. be glad your alive. ive been through so much and im
only 16 i know you're probably oh shut up what the fuck do you know.,
trust me i know how you feel it really hurts sometimes and suicide is what
you think is your only choise but it aint ok. im here for you if you need
me on msn or anything.
hornysecbeast666@hotmail.com
think before you act!!!!!!
x x x
Anti-depressants arent the answer. In loadsa cases they can make u feel
worse. they r highly addictice, v.v.v. bad 4 and dont cure you. Y do ppl
think they can?!?!
Hi my names is Aisha, ermm well its hard for me to say this about life
seeing as people who say they love us gave it to us i apretiate d whole
meeing ov it n everythin but i wish we could click our fingures and
disapear for at least a hour or something, i used 2 get hit by my perants,
but now its okay thigs appen 2 me now i get emotinally abused and i get
called things, my perants say the most important thing in the world, isnt
me, it isnt being happy, it isnt havin a loving home its about studying
and gettin A's n B's in my report. They sometimes say that i was a mistake
and they would be hapy if i ran away! ive already tried to kill myslef
twice, the first time i tried hanging myself with a extention cord fing,
it chocked me and my eyes went blood shot i guess wen i heard my mums foot
steps coming up the stairs i stoped and thought it wouldnt work. I still
cut my self on my wrist i bleed and its painfull, but its better than the
emotinal pain!! i hope you can understand n help wiv how i feel, im
thinkin abt killin myself but i dont know how to do it with the least
pain!! xXx people who want to chat wiv me im 14/f/uk my e-mail adress iz
striders_sxc_minx@hotmail.com ppl who r just goin 2 fuk my life up evn mre
dont bova pls!!
I AM 14 AND FEELING THE DESPRATE MEASURES WHICH I AM SOON ABOUT TO TAKE.
THE IS NOTHING WHICH I FEEL IS WORTH LIVING FOR ALL I FEEL IS A BLACK
EMPTY HOLE INSIDE. EVERYWHERE I GO I HOPE THAT SOME INSTANT
I AM 14 AND FEELING THE DESPRATE MEASURES WHICH I AM SOON ABOUT TO TAKE.
THE IS NOTHING WHICH I FEEL IS WORTH LIVING FOR ALL I FEEL IS A BLACK
EMPTY HOLE INSIDE. EVERYWHERE I GO I HOPE THAT SOME INSTANT ACCIDENT WOULD
HAPPEN
im about to take 20 pillz and end my life all i ever feel like is jumping
in front o f a bus or stabing my self in the head so if you fell the same
hurry uP and write back because im getting up and getting a glass of water
now
sam dont do anything stupid with them pills i gave you i dont want to get
the blame i no u fell suicidal but your my best mate and i dont want you
to die ill come round to your house if you dont quit
to late man ive already taken 7 and my mums making my tea i cant go down
stairs like this its too late to turn back no one can pursuade me now
Look i feel like tht all d tyme, u may say it, but u r being selfish,
think ov all the pppl that love u, think ov what your mum is goin 2 c wen
she sees u like that, lying on the floor, what if i dosent work, what if u
end up wiv a brain tumer all our life thn u cnt think have fun walk, go to
the toilet by yourelf, eat on your own or do anything!!! pls recocider!!!
xXx
listen to me my dad beats me every day he puts his ciggies out on my hand
my mum throws plates and knifes at me and my life is shit no 1 talks to me
in school im fucking up so what do i have to loose i wanna FUCKING
DIE!!!!, JAY TELL MY MUM IM SORRY BUT SHE SHOULDNT OF SPAT AND THREW
THINGS AT ME IM SORRY JAY YOUR MY LAST AND INLY THOUGHT I M SOU FUCKJED
UPO NOW IY CNAT EVEN THIN K ST RR AIGHT
listen to me my dad beats me every day he puts his ciggies out on my hand
my mum throws plates and knifes at me and my life is shit no 1 talks to me
in school im fucking up so what do i have to loose i wanna FUCKING
DIE!!!!, JAY TELL MY MUM IM SORRY BUT SHE SHOULDNT OF SPAT AND THREW
THINGS AT ME IM SORRY JAY YOUR MY LAST AND INLY THOUGHT I M SOU FUCKJED
UPO NOW IY CNAT EVEN THIN K ST RR AIGHT
sam listen mate im going to ring you so disconnect your internet ok pull
out the plug and ill ring you, just talk to me but first tell me how many
you have taken and what you have had
pls fink abt it b-4 u do it!! i had tht wen i ws lil, bt now ive grwn up,
instead ov killin urself, run away!! do ya av msn or smethin its easyer 2
tlk on der!! im here n i used to gt plates thrown at me aswell, cus i sed
shut up, ppl blullied me at skwl, thn i hit sme 1 n thy wer all scared ov
me, now im popular, i tried killin myself lst nite, wiv a rope i cut my
wrist, pls my addy is striders_sxc_minx@hotmail.com. pls xXx xXAISHAXx
i tjhink u i took the 20 Es ugavae me and 8 paracettemoll help jayay im
sooo sorrrry
sam im coming round hang in there mate thanx aisha but you tried and sams
like that
I hope it works out sam!! i wish i culd help u mre, i ent gd at dis!! xXx
xXAISHAXx
Hey ppl chin up, suicide is the easy way out u will feel alot betta about
ur self gettin through it all then lookin back on ur self as u can b proud
about wot u achieved.
hello, this is my first time doin somet like this. i watched a programme
last nite about how people use the web to discuss their depression etc. it
was about people who had committed suicide through using the internet, and
for some people they had been helped by using chat rooms and stuff. i dont
know how to use msn, but i wouldnt mind chatting a bit. ive been goin thru
the shits for a couple of years and i think its all getting on top of me
different day .....same old shit
but why does it feel like ive been hear before
why wont people let me 2 b on my own
i need 2 break free i need 2 b on my own 2 finish it once and for all why
do people try 2 change u 4 thw better when we dont want 2 b changed in the
first place why do people lay the guilt trip on us "think of the 1's u
leave behind"
u get asked by family , doctors etc etc etc "why do u feel this way" if we
did know that we would'nt be rock bottom so manny questions that ive tryed
2 figure out in the past
4 some of us x mass and the new year has brought all the feelings on but 4
some people like myself that have been living the past 10 years with mixed
up feeling all the time
i would like 2 say something that one of my online support / friend said 2
me a few nights ago
Emma .......when i started feeling the way i do now i did think that i
could cope with it myself and in time i would be a ok again i was sooooo
wrong
go and speak 2 your GP about getting further treament i left it 3 years
before i found out i could'nt sort it on my own dont b a fool like i have
and think i can get over it without any1 help
take action now before its 2 late 2 do anything about
"Everyday you get through is a Success"
i did'nt understand that till the other night
Pam if u ever come over hear and read this
THANK YOU 4 sharing your time and strength when i needed it the most i
would like 2 come 2 dinner with u and your family but i still feel
discomfort when around others please dont take offence 2 this
want to look in the mirrior and like what i see.
instead i see this monster looking back at me.
want to find peace of mind or should that be piece of my mind
that likes me.
lost in this tormented soul of mine.
trying to make sense of this pointless life that i live.
want to know this person they call a lovely man.
want to go to sleep now.
so how can you help me.
sad , sick , souless stupid
mundane , moronic me.
THIS IS TO END OF THE LINE!! YOURE A DISGRACEFUL LIAR
No im not and never have been suicidal but youre a fake and a phony its so
freakin obvious get a life get a fuckin life and what abh charge did you
get off if you were unsafe?im a lawyer baby so if you did youd be locked
up in a mad house lying loser
this is the frist time i have ever used a chat thing i've tryed to sort
myself out 3 or 4 time (if you get what i mean) i'm tired of looking in
the mirror and only seeing black eyes through a black soul, tired of it
all and i surpose tired of keeping it all in side when all i what to do is
shout let me of this fuckin ride.
so if their is anybody out there please just say hi.
hey, i totaly undastnd ow u feel at it, n ppl fink ov me as loud aswell.
but wen i told ppl in ma class they made fun ov me callin me a attention
seeker! xx
look people i know what it is like i am 15 and going through it my shelf i
have has a bad life being sexualy abused i want to die 2 but just look at
all the people you will be leaving behind family if you cant see that you
have friends and family not even 1 person that really cears for you.
if you do kill your shelf then thats for your shelf but look at the people
that you leave behind look on it like a bowl of milk you are the milk and
your friends and family are the bowl they bond with you so you can not
make any mess please do not tale the easy way out please who ever you are
the are ups and downs are in life dont be apart of the death chain PLEASE
WHO EVER YOU ARE READING THIS DONT TAKE LIFE FOR GRANTED PLEASE nikki
I am a 21 year old female and I have been suffering from depression or at
least have had suicidal thoughts for at least a good two years now.
Something happened recently and I feel like I have totally started to lose
my mind, and I've started threatening all my mates like I will stab them
if they fuck with me, and I have sent various hate emails and text
messages to people telling them that they have done this to me. The fact
is, I know I'm not going to be around much longer because I can't take
this mental pain much more. People say I have everything going for me,
pretty, intelligent etc etc, but why is that relevant when all your heart
yearns for is the pain to go away? I truly do not want to be alive
anymore. I'm going to go on google.com and research methods of suicide
just like a documentary I saw the other night so I can get it right.
My last words are: "Sebastiane, Why Have Thou Forsaken Me? You could
have had me, you could have it all back."
XxXLiamia PageXxX
i think its wrong for ppl to come on here and attack ppl who are feeling
suicidel. ive lost countless friends and family members thro suicide, if
ive learnt anything its that suicide is an illness which is greatly
misunderstood. its a selfish act where ppl concerned feel they have no
other way out and where no- one can help them and feel better if they were
out of this world, but dont think of the pain that they are leaving
behind. the percentage of suicides are getting higher each year , but
there is no helping ppl who are suicidel, they have to help themselves and
realise that life isnt is bad as it seems, u make ur own happiness, ur
life is what you make it but ppl dont seem to realise you can change your
life around no matter how hard it seems at the time for the better.
is ne 1 here, ppl fink tht suicide is a bad fing i fink its a way ov tryin
2 sort fings sort fings out d fastest! xXx
is ne 1 here, ppl fink tht suicide is a bad fing i fink its a way ov tryin
2 sort fings sort fings out d fastest! xXx
aisha plz explain to me why u feel this is the way to sort thing out
i fink it cos its easy n fast if ya dnt fink abt it, if u go threw klife
h8n urselff ther aint no point is ther?? ppl dnt love me nt evn
perants?!?!?!? xXx
it cant always be easy and fast, sometimes it goes wrong and u could end
up disabled. why is it you think no one cares or loves you, whats made
your life so bad that u hate yourself
cos ppl actully say it, my perants say theyd b better off
Where is everyone from? Is this a British chat room or american? do you
all know each other
Can you people please type in complete english sentences with properly
spelled words and everything?
You look like a bunch of illiterate
heathens.
felling lost like tears in the rain,
lost in a world of changes.
can you see the end as you dance on a tide of black rope,
thinking to your self "it can't go on much longer".
hoping that thay will let you of this ride,
but all you can hear is laghter.
If anyone ever wants a friend or someone to listen to im happy to be
there. I have been trained in counselling and have had shit times too so I
can relate to a lot of what people are saying.
aisha, how old are you if you dont mind me asking? And your parents
actually tell you they are better off without you ?
yeah thy do it hurts bare bad wen they do im 13, wt abt u
heey people
how is evey one.
hey im new to all this acturally chatting on msgboards so hi.i guess im on
here because i hav been feeling suicidal 4the past 2years and im only
16,iv neva been able to speak to any1 about it beacuase they think im a
freak or that im putting it on.i cant explain myself 2any1 anymore and i
dont even no myself.i neva sleep at nite because i dont want the next day
to come and i believ it will prolong it, yet wen i finally sleep i wish
that i wud neva hav to wake up again, ive screwed my life up and i cant
bare it anymore,causeing myself pain is like an outlet but its neva
enough,i just needed to get myself heard even if its by people i dont even
no,thankyou all for listening?reading
hey never been on here before any1 still up?
Its really sad to see how many teenagers are suicidal, u have ur whole
lifes ahead of u , but u wanna give up on life now, i know there are
pressures of being a teenager but life does get better if u let it .
hi sarah im kinda new.
ive been suicidal for 3 years
anyway how r u??
hey, a nuva day ov torcher, ther ent no point on livin on if ppl ent
happy:(, does ne 1 av ne good counciler tht r 4 free n wnt tell ur perants
abt d situation:( no 1 knos apart frm u guys now, im 13/f/uk, livin life
as long as i can bt it gets harder each day. xXx
Aisha please email me if you want to talk, I used to be into counselling
and worked a lot with children i'm happy to exchange emails and help if I
can, anything you tell me will be confidential and free I would like to
help as a friend.
okay fanks my e-mail is striders_sxc_minx@hotmail.com
email on the way :) the offer is open to anyone who wants someone to
listen.
To everyone on here, and especially the teenagers, your life is worth
living, please try to hang in there, I know being young is hard,
especially if you have gone through things in your life that aren't fair,
I know, because my childhood was like living in hell.
Some of these things are the reasons I'm here, but I'm still holing on,
I'm over 30 now, and I try to hold on tight, and make it through this life
that was dealt to me, I don't like it, and it sickens me to think about
it.
But this is my life, I try to make the best out of it, things can better
for you, you need to just hold on, Aiisha, I have a daughter that just
turned 14 a couple of months ago, the thought of her feeling half way like
I do, it saddens me. I hope she's lucky enough in her life to find some
happiness, no matter what, the same with all my children.
I'm not allowed to see my kids right now, it's not by my choice, it wasn't
from anything bad that I've done.
And I would never tell my children there worthless, ot their a burden, or
anything else bad that would hurt them, I love my children, this sounds
babyish, but after reading your alls post, I'm in tears. My oldest is 14,
and in my eyes, she's still a baby, innocent, so to me, you all are the
same, you don't need to be treated this way.
You need love, you need to be given the young lifes you deserve, when you
are under 18, this is when your lifes are the most precious, you need to
cherish it and enjoy as long as possible, because soon your an adult, and
your problems gets worst, and decisions are yours, and you live your own
lifes. You have to decide how they turn out.
I hope my children are happy, I hope they don't feel this way, I pray to
God the best for them, and you all too.
I pray the best for everyone, I feel crazy most of the time, crazy, I
think about ending my life, and it makes me feel worst, because out of all
I have in my life, how can I be so sad that I want to end it?
When I hear all the problems in the world, they sadden me more, and they
depress me more.
It's bad enough that adults feel this way, why do the children have to
feel it also?
Please, find someone you can talk to, your lifes are worth it! If my
children felt this way, I'd want to hold them inmy arms, I'd want to know
their problems, I'd want to make them feel better and try to help them.
Please, don't give up!!
Debbie
Christopher,
I was pleased to see that you will edit my posts, thank you alot.
wot the hell is going on all u ppl r there sayin u sud think of wot it
will do to ur family well i am 16 n my dad killed him sen when i wa 10 n i
found him n yet here i am about to kill my self the same way n after 6
years of watchin my family get over my dad it is possible no one even
talks bout him anymore i swear i am the only one who thinks about him n so
i no my family will get ova me just think all ur doing in life is waitin
to die all the love n crap is just away of passin the time anyone wana
talk then email me sassy00012001@hotmail.com if i am still here that is x
x x
jonathon hi today is not to bad i guess because it hasnt started.ive just
been walking out side in the frost so i can feel the cold,its2:24am, did u
no it feels almost clensing(if thats right). how r u?
its sucks thatevery1 is down and it sucks that i can relate to how the
majority feel on here.
sorry 'down' is a pathetic understated descriptive word, nothing can
really sum up the word 'suicide' other that its self
My son sold the land I was living own then keck me out without a dime. My
daughter does.t care what happens to me she says she has another mom and
don't want me. I'm stillng pills from people to try and get enough to kill
my self. I;ve tried 2 but just don't know how many to take. So I'm trying
to save up more. Do anyone know how many it would take? I just want to die
there is nothing for me to live for.
The comments on this web site have been really helpful. I am in such
turmoil as to what to do. I have already got all the anti depressants and
sedatives lined up. My parents are at work, my boyfriend kicked me out of
his house last week because he couldnt cope with me anymore, being a
depressive mess. I love him so much and just cant see life without him. I
only me him a few months ago but it has changed my life. I wish I was
pregnant so that he had to stay with me. Perhaps I am - I dont know. All I
know right now is that there is no point in living. I was raped last year
and my best friend - my horse was put down. Please somebody help me - Im
only 22 and have so much ahead but right now I dont know what to do. My
parents and brothers love me to death - its going to break their hearts -
my mum loves life and I dont think she will ever be the same. Help me
someone please.
hello aisha im sorry i didnt see your post. im 32 and my name is carol. i
lost my sister to suicide a close friend at my work and a life term friend
also through suicide. i tried as much as i could to help my sister but she
gave up on life. and it broke my heart . i wish people would give their
lifes a chance before giving up on it and make their lifes better for
themselves. anyway i really hope you get through what your going through
and dont turn out another number on the suicide chart.
i kno u may say tht bt i mean i fink its d only way i h8 livin i h8 knowin
ppl h8 me, n r disapointed in me. xxx
hey its me again i realised something today i hate even looking at my own
reflection everyone knows i am suicidle now even my mum n yet knowone has
done anything about it i av cuts all up my arm which my mum has seen n she
dint even ask y i did it she dint care so y wud she give a shit if i wa
dead lol proves she wont so wot else is there to keep me going
Our body is a temple,!! take care of it and cherish
it! Don't Abuse.....it We only have 1 and 1, life! I know sometimes i feel
i wont 2 kill... ma self, because i feel so lonely!! I have no 1 2 talk 2.
I just wish i had a boy friend 2 talk 2 and say anything 2 and cuddle. I
have being wanting a boy friend 4 ages, I probely soud like a slut. Sorry
i should just shut up.
Our body is a temple,!! take care of it and cherish
it! Don't Abuse.....it We only have 1 and 1, life! I know sometimes i feel
i wont 2 kill... ma self, because i feel so lonely!! I have no 1 2 talk 2.
I just wish i had a boy friend 2 talk 2 and say anything 2 and cuddle. I
have being wanting a boy friend 4 ages, I probely soud like a slut. Sorry
i should just shut up.
Our body is a temple,!! take care of it and cherish
it! Don't Abuse.....it We only have 1 and 1, life! I know sometimes i feel
i wont 2 kill... ma self, because i feel so lonely!! I have no 1 2 talk 2.
I just wish i had a boy friend 2 talk 2 and say anything 2 and cuddle. I
have being wanting a boy friend 4 ages, I probely soud like a slut. Sorry
i should just shut up.
I know i have a check 2 talk, saying our bodys a temple? But it is. I know
that, But i think evry1 dose feel like killing there selfs some times,
Evry 1 has it in them, but it depends what it is they want 2 kill there
self 4....But some ppl have more strength than others, some just do it,
some don't.....
fae lee xxx
no offence bt wtf r u on abt?? pp say thy cre, bt i fink th only cre
b--cos thy dnt wnt 2 av 2 fink it ws der fault abt ma death, i h8 ma body
n everythin abt me!! im goin insane i av panik attacks every day n no 1
evn gives
People, think about what Gods only begotten son went through, he was
beaten and hung on a cross to die, he died for us.
God gave us his son, so we can be saved.
God also gave us our bodies,
please cherish them.
Your right Lee, our bodies are our temple, it says so in the bible,
also someone else had already posted the same line on here before, so
apparently you all also read and believe in the bible.
Please don't end your lifes, this will not answer anything, it will
only give you eternity in hell.
At least if your alive, you have a chance to be saved.
And then your reward will be heaven.
This is to Aiisha and any other children on here, if your parents treat
you badly, why don't you report them to child services, they don't deserve
you , if they don't want you. You can be placed in a nice loving home
until you turn 18. Or if you have a aunt or uncle, or someone else in your
family that would be happy to take you in and love you, the courts will
also place you with them.
DOn't just sit around and do nothing, your young and you should be
treated with love, talk to your scholl councelor for help, you don't have
to just sit around and do nothing.
You deserve better, you deserve a life.
if i were to drown i could let the water rush over me and make me pure and
clean again. it would give me the silence i have long hoped for, the
silence of the sea.
it would be a poetic injustice not to be at some peace in the end. i wish
it could be quiet i wish that there was something to take away all the
noise and voices which fill my head. i wish for every moment not to be
mine, i want there to be no more pain, i want it to all go away, i just
want it to stop.
its got really bad today and im unsure what to do, im all alone, and in
that i mean literally aswell as metally. ive been left, i am believed
sturdy enough to be left alone. but when alone there is time to think,
there is time to relish on pain and there is time to undisclose yourself
to yourself.
i can not sleep, i can not eat, it is not living it is simply existing.
its a past time i would rather not have.
i want to pass into a state where i can not feel, i want to be numb, from
existance, i want to be me.
i have had enuff, failing wont b an option 4 me ny mur, thats it, i mean
it. an sarah, i hope u r ok
x
beth, mail me asap!!
f''kin throw the pills away.........
wwwillinoisleader.com/discussion/display_topic_threads.asp?ForumID=40&TopicID=1161
hiya, i left a message on 28th of december @ 6.37 am and a guy callied
wayne asked if i was still there so wayne if u still wona chat like i sed
b4 drop me a email all of u take care luve
emma
xxx
No Beth. don'y thow them away! give them to me!!
I'll put them to good use!
this web site sucks
some of us are just tryin to feel alittle bit better
hello every one, i havent been on here in ages im happy now! yay! but if
anyone wants to talk to me,
sireslut@hotamil.com.
please do
hi, i'm new year but I really need 2 tlk 2 sum1. I have been depressed for
about a year now but now it has gotten so much worse and i just wish i had
the balls to hang myself or slit my throat. I've been in this place before
and my friends helped me but they don't understand. I don't wanna kill
myself but there's no other way out.
Hi i have never done this before but i'm asking for help i have attempted
suicide and been hospitalised 11 times and the feelings i get before i do
it are back, i just want to talk to someone who won't judge me or tell me
it's wrong to feel like this. I don't have any parents or relatives to
talk to and i cant burden my small group of friends with anymore shit. if
you think you can help please wite back my email is
princessbufly@hotmail.com
fuck this shit. gonna go kill myself.
fuck this shit. gonna go kill myself.
fuck this shit. gonna go kill myself.
katizia i hope that u r all right dont do anything
FOR ANYONE THAT IS SERIOUS AND WANTS TO MAKE AN INFORMED DECISION WIHOUT
ENDING UP WORSE THAN THEY ALREADY ARE , THERE'S A GOOD WELL-INFORMED BOOK
TITLED
'SUICIDE-METHODS AND CONSEQUENCES'
I FORGET THE AUTHOR COS MY MUM ,I SUSPECT, DISPOSED OF IT. CAN YOU BELEIVE
THAT- THE PEOPLE THAT LOVE YOU.ONLY JOKING! I HAD READ IT BY THEN AND GOT
AS MUCH AS I COULD FROM IT ANYWAY.
AFTER READING ALL THE DIFFERENT METHODS AND STATISTICAL MORTALITY
RATES,RELIABLITY RATINGS AND RELATIVE SUFFERING/UNPLEASANTNESS I THOUGHT
THAT CARBON MONOXIDE SEEMED AND STILL SEEMS THE BEST WAY TO GO. JUST BE
CAREFUL YOUR LOVED ONES DONT FIND YOU COS YOU TURN A HORRIBLE RED-BLUE
PURPLE I THINK- THE RESULT OF YOUR BLOOD STARVED OF OXYGEN.- THE SCIENCE
SEEMS ACTUALLY QUITE CLEVER.AN OLD CAR WITH A DIRTY ENGINE-PRE 1970 TO BE
SAFE-ALL MODERRN CARS ENGINES ARE CLEANED UP SO ITS STILL POSSSIBLE BUT
NOT AS RELIABLE AS IT ONCE WAS UNLESS YOU'VE GOT AN OLD ENGINE CAR. OR
BETTER STILL, MY PREFERENCE- AN INDUSTRIAL CANISTER OF PURE CO. 1% SHOULD
KILL YOU HOWEVER PURE STUFF 4-6MINS PROBABLY. EXTREMELY RELIABLE IF PURE
ENOUGH. AND AS FAR AS I CAN TELL AND SUSPECT IT IS PROBABLY MORE OR LESS
PAINLESS AS YOU SHOULD GO UNCONSCIOUS PRETTY QIUCKLY.
HOWEVER READ THE BOOK, DO YOUR RESEARCH PROPERLY.BUT DON'T CONSIDER DOING
IT UNLESS YOU'VE GIVEN GOOD HARD THOUGHT-AT LEAST A COUPLE OF YEARS MAYBE
MORE. AT LEAST IF YOU DECIDE TO GO AHEAD YOU'RE NOT GOING TO MAKE A
DECISION YOU LATER REGRET OR THAT YOU WERE JUST GOING THROUGH SOME SORT OF
PHASE WHICH HAS WITH RETROSPECT ENDED. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE SO DON'T BE
FOOLISH OR SENTIMENTAL. .PLEASE WAIT A COUPLE OF YEARS BEFORE YOU EVEN
CONSIDER SUCH NOTIONS
BUT AT LEAST IF YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK ,I.E READ THIS BOOK, YOU WILL NOT DO
SOMETHING YOU LATER REGRET.REMEMBER THER E ARE PEOPLE THAT COMMITED
SUICIDE THAT SHOULDNT HAVE AND SHOULD BE ALIVE NOT DEAD. THAT IS ONE OF
THE TRAGEDIES IN THIS TABOO SUJECT. tHAT PEOPLE ARE NOT PRESENTED WITH
REALISTIC OPTIONS OR CHOICES THAT ARE WEL-INFORMED, RATHER ILL-INFORMED ;
THIS IS UNFORTUNATE AND HAS HAD TRAGIC OR FATAL CONSEQUENCES.
LIFE CAN
BE WONDERFUL.
And don't think your girlfriend or boyfriend leaving you or any other
temporary malady is a good enough reason. Because its not and in six
months you will probably have forgotten all about thoughts of suicide and
and you will once agian appreciate the simple pleasures like the breeze
blowing against your cheeks.
Sites like this are always full of tourists like Christopher eager to hand
out advice yet as far from the mark as poss. Mere insight would make all
the difference even if they cant quite put themselve in your shoes.
hey ppl well i am thinkin of doing it tonight n hopefully it will work so
if this is the last message u get from me then u all no i did to it n if
not then i will av one less way of u all tryin to do it lolz i aint scared
or upset or anything the scariest thing to me is not being in comtrol of
my own death i am happy now knowing that it may work n all my pain might b
ova so no one get upset for me or worry coz this is perhaps the only thing
that will eva make me happy lots of love n kisses sarah i wish the rest of
u good luck with ur lives n hope u dnt have to end it the same way i am
doing n if u do c u all in another life dad i am coming to b wit u foreva
x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
please sarah don'y do it i thought like that after my parents died i went
down a slippery slope and i have never stopped grieveing i miss them like
hell all the time and i do want to die i am just too fucking stupid to
actually make it work i have tried it all exept the car thing i even drove
my bike through a red light and ended up with pind in both my knees the
paine dosent go away whatever anyone says but please i'm still here and
you should be too please sarah don't
also sorry for the spelling i'm very spaced without my meds at the mo but
at least i can feel again even if it is only pain. I know it's bad and i
don't even know why i'm saying all this cos i really hate my life and
understand why people would feel this way and want to end it now but i
cant bear the thought of another person who has this kind of pain inside.
i envy you for not being frightend but i also feel such sadness for the
people who you will undoubtedly leave behind thats the only thig that has
ever held me back i think my sister we don't see each other and she is
scared of what i do but i don't want to leave her asking why like we both
did when my parents died i don't even know where i'm going with this but i
guess it's the meds sorry evryone for rambling
blue skies green fieldsx
I think this is the first time for a person who loves life to join this
chat, right ?
I-CAN'T-BELEIVE-THIS-WHERE-DID-MY-FUCKIN-POSTS-GO?
NOW-I-HAVE-TO-WRITE-THIS-SHIT-ALL-OVER-AGAIN
YEAH-I-WANT-EFFECTIVE-METHODS-OF-KILLING-MYSELF-IN-AS-SHORT-TIME-AND-WITH-AS-LITTLE-PAIN
I'M-21-AND-MY-LIFE-IS-TOTALLY-FUCKED-UP-AND-ALL-I-SEEM-TO-DO-LATELY-IS-JUST-GET-INTO-POINTLESS-FIGHTS
AND-ENDLESS-BRAWLS-AT-CLUBS
WHICH-HALF-THE-TIME-I-DON'T-EVEN-START
I'M-SICK-OF-ASSHOLES-COMING-IN-HERE-TRYING-TO-STIR-SHIT-UP-WITH-US-SUICIDAL-PEOPLE
FUCK-OFF!
YOUR-COMMENTS-ARE-WORTHLESS
OH-YEAH-ANOTHER-THING-IF-YOUR-DEPRESSED-AND-U-DON'T-SUFFER-FROM-MENTAL-HEALTH
AND-YOUR-UNHAPPY
ANTI-DEPRESSANTS-AIN'T-GONNA-HELP-U
I-WAS-ON-PROZAC-AND-IT-DID-SHIT-GOOD-FOR-ME
U-EITHER-GOT-TO-SORT-YA-LIFE-OUT-YOURSELF-USING-OTHER-WAYS
OR-END-IT
IT'S-PRETTY-SIMPLE
BUT-MOST-OF-US-DON'T-WANNA-CARRY-ON
AND-PEOPLE-AIN'T-EVEN-GIVIN-US-ADVICE-ON-FUCKIN-SUICIDE
WE-WANNA-KNOW-ABOUT-METHODS
NOT-THE-SAME-OH-DON'T-KILL-YOURSELF-BULLSHIT
THINGS-WILL-GET-BETTER
YEAH-BEEN-THERE-DONE-THAT
NEXT!
life is beautiful in its uglyness. to live is the great indulgance, death
is the great abstinace, hmmmm which to choose? at the turn of an instant
my entire life is fucked. the only sokution so far is carbon monoxide gas.
I didn't say it to cause offence i just said it because i cant bear the
thought of someone else doing what i do i care about people just not
myself and i am so sick of people thinking i am some do gooder you want
methods i got one for you if you have the bottle cos i certainly did slit
your wrists not across but down etc etc etc if you really want to kill
yourself you can do it but believe me its harder than it looks so stop
taking the piss out of someone who cares about others just because i dont
want to be here dosent mean that i want the rest of you to die. Pick on
someone who can take it not on someone who has little or nothing left
keeping them alive!
I didn't say it to cause offence i just said it because i cant bear the
thought of someone else doing what i do i care about people just not
myself and i am so sick of people thinking i am some do gooder you want
methods i got one for you if you have the bottle cos i certainly did slit
your wrists not across but down etc etc etc if you really want to kill
yourself you can do it but believe me its harder than it looks so stop
taking the piss out of someone who cares about others just because i dont
want to be here dosent mean that i want the rest of you to die. Pick on
someone who can take it not on someone who has little or nothing left
keeping them alive!
I didn't say it to cause offence i just said it because i cant bear the
thought of someone else doing what i do i care about
